By Myself
by Abarai Starsha
Summary: Adopted from xXxMiserableLoveFairyxXx...  Toshiro loved Rukia but let her go.  Now Rukia is forced to fight for her life and her sanity as she faces her biggest fear.  HitsuxRuki although there will be IchixRuki and if you squint UlquixRuki... T for now..
1. Chapter 1

**AN: I have been given the great honor of adopting this story from xXxMiserableLoveFairyxXx. Like many of you, I was hooked with this story line and when she stopped and placed it up for adoption; I had to put my name in the hat. I saw a lot of potential as to where the plot could go. I have made an outline and while I'm marking this as Toshiro x Rukia however, you will see a lot of traces of Ichigo x Rukia and a tiny bit of Ulquiorra x Rukia if you squint sideways cause that's just how it is. Also, while I have not firmly decided on the ending, where I'm going with it is definitely outside the "lovey dovey romantic" realm. Want romance? Visit: On the Way to Alaska... (shameless plug, I know...)  
><strong>

**A ton of angst (as usual from me) and hopefully an enjoyable story that you will love reading as much as I love putting together.  
><strong>

**So, thank MiserableLoveFairy for this wonderful story (and bug her to update her others) I hope I can do it justice...**

**AU OCC and all that jazz… **

**I still don't own Bleach… If only…**

* * *

><p>By Myself<p>

Originally by: xXxMiserableLoveFairyxXx

Retold and continued by: Abarai Starsha

Chapter 1

Toshiro hated seeing the tears that ran down her face. He had to hold himself back from brushing them away with his thumb. Instead, his hand twitched at his side. Ever since he made his decision he was dreading this moment. Rukia was the last person he wanted to see hurt, yet here he was, doing just that. He sighed and ran his hand through his white hair. He rehearsed this many times and was prepared for any reaction…But preparing for it and seeing it are two different things. He wasn't prepared for the hurt he felt, compounded by the knowledge that it was his fault, his decision that made it this way.

He had no choice, right? He made a promise and he was a man of his word. He could never back out of a promise. Even if that meant sacrificing his own wants and needs; even if that meant sacrificing her.

He decided to show as little emotion as possible. If he could get her to hate him, think that he never cared for her, it would be ok. She would bounce back as she always does. Wasn't she the queen of sad stories? She had Renji and Ichigo. Surely her brother would help her through. Make her well, help her move on.

He didn't want to look at her, watch her break in front of him. He didn't want this, he didn't want to hurt her but it had to be done. It didn't matter; he said what he came to say. It was done. With a curt nod, he forced himself to turn around and leave. He wasn't sure of his own resolve if he stayed much longer.

Rukia hated tears, they were useless but she couldn't seem to stop herself. Why did it have to hurt so much? She should have seen this coming and cursed herself for turning a blind eye to the signs.

She watched as he left without saying good-bye and thought about how it got to this point.

As they prepared for war, their friendship blossomed, their cold elements bringing them together. They spent many days together, training and soon many nights, talking. It didn't take long before she started to fall in love with him. She thought he felt the same… The way he looked at her, the things he said…

Stupid, stupid, stupid!

She sighed as she leaned back against the tree. She didn't know when she fell to the ground and didn't really care. She choked back a sob and decided she was done crying. She felt the sadness drain, slowly replaced by anger. She was angry with _her, _angry with him, angry with herself.

Everything was going great until _she_ decided to come back into his life again. Then it was a missed evening here, missed training session there and missions he alone had to accomplish that would take days at a time. Looking back, Rukia hitched a laugh. She always wondered why Matsumoto would always look at her with that sad face as he "prepared" for a mission. She had wondered why no one else spoke of his "missions" or why they were never discussed at the meetings. She trusted him completely.

She sighed at how cruel her life was. She knew how wrong it was to love, she knew the consequences, and she had thought she prepared herself. This was why a Shinigami didn't rely on feelings, they were useless in combat; nothing more than a distraction. Yet, here she was, falling stupidly in love with someone who shoved it right back at her.

She stood up and decided to take a walk in her divisions gardens. It was one of her favorite places to think. It comforted her when he would cancel one of their sessions together, although now she knew where he was. What he was doing. Who he was with. She mulled over the conversation in her mind.

"_Hey, you're back!" Her blood pulsed with excitement as he gave her a weak nod. He had been gone on another two week long "mission" and just returned. She rushed to his side, eager to see him, talk to him, when she saw the look in his face. Something was wrong. He fidgeted as she neared. _

"_Hey, yeah…I guess so." He muttered and saw her standing right in front of him staring at him with her violet orbs. He looked away, almost losing his nerve. She was so beautiful and innocent; she didn't deserve to have her heart broken. _

"_What's wrong?" She asked as he took her hand without saying anything. He saw the concern in her face as he tensed up. He didn't dare look at her. He couldn't. He took a deep breath. _

"_I'm with Momo now…I can't see you anymore. That includes training." He replied and looked up to see her face harden. He let her go as she removed her hand from his._

"_What? I thought we– "_

"_You thought wrong," he said, cutting her off. He saw the tears as they started to well up in her eyes._

"_I see. She means more to you than I ever could." That reply stunned him. His first instinct was to fiercely deny it. But then… why was he here? _

"_Rukia, it never would have worked out. It's better this way." He took a step back and shielded himself as he watched her break before his eyes. He looked up to see her face, her tears brimming over and falling slowly down her delicate features. She did her best to hide her breaking heart. She quickly dried her eyes as more tears spilled. _

"_Go then," she managed to whisper. "Be happy, Toshiro."_

_He stood there as his hand twitched at his side. His eyes hardened and he gave her a nod. Just like that, he was gone._

The gardens did little to sooth her breaking heart. If her brother saw her now, surely she would be labeled a disgrace; a disgrace to Shinigami, a disgrace to the name Kuchiki. Crying over love, ha. She dried her eyes again and sniffed. She looked at the wet ground, full of her tears. She narrowed her eyes and scanned her surroundings. No one was around.

She turned the corner and walked to the training grounds. Her heart was heavy. It hurt. She drew her Zanpaktou and swung her around and into a tree. She was angry. She was angry at herself, angry at him. She swung again and again, harder and faster with each blow. She hated how she felt. Hated it.

It took her a long time for her to admit to herself she was in love with him. Even after he started leaving her, she loved him. She was never quite sure how he felt about her. They spent a lot of time together and maybe it was all one sided. Maybe it was all in her head. Had she deluded herself into thinking he cared about her?

She definitely knew how he felt now, didn't she? She thought bitterly as she swung her sword again. He didn't love her. He didn't want to have anything to do with her.

It hurt.

Her human life was cut short due to an accident. Her sister couldn't deal with the harsh conditions and a baby so she was left behind. Tossed away, unwanted. She managed to survive until she met up with Renji and his gang. They were a family for a while until the academy where he all but pushed her away into the Kuchiki family. That was a prison in itself. She couldn't do anything right. The clan hated her, the only reason she was there was because of a promise a man made to his wife. She killed Kaien, destroyed Ichigo's life.

Tears were not allowed. Emotions were not allowed. She was forbidden to feel yet she felt everything. She was a burden to everyone around her. She wasn't tall enough, she wasn't fast enough, she wasn't good enough, she wasn't strong enough.

She was a fool.

Time after time when she allowed herself to become happy something would happen to take it away. A piece of her heart would be lost. She gave what was left to Toshiro only for him to give it back, broken.

She was always left to pick up the pieces. She couldn't do it anymore.

She swung her blade into the ground and panted as she leaned on the hilt. She couldn't do it anymore. She couldn't do anything anymore.

She was shocked to hear a low chuckle behind her.

"My, my, Rukia-chan, why so sad and angry?" A chilling voice said. Rukia's eyes widened as she stood and jerked her blade out of the ground. She swung it around and faced the man who dared return to Soul Society.

"What are you doing here?" She demanded. Her voice cold, filled with confidence she didn't have. "Ichimaru." How the hell did he get through the barrier? How did no one know he was here?

"Put down your sword, I'm not here to kill you." He responded with a smile. Rukia narrowed her eyes. This was the same man who got off on torturing her, taking the last of her resolve and laughing before her execution.

"No. Sorry, but I don't trust you."

"Come on now, if I wanted to I would have already done it as you were exerting yourself a few moments ago."

Her eyes widened, "How long have you been here?" she demanded.

"Long enough to know someone was dumb enough hurt you," he said in that silky tone. Rukia found herself lowering her sword. "I'm sorry whoever it was didn't realize what it was they had," he said as he let his eyes roam over her figure. Rukia shivered in response.

"What do you care? Why are you here?"

"Aizen sent me here to make you an offer. Wasn't it just a few moments ago you were upset because you weren't good enough for these pathetic souls? You were not strong enough? Come with me and I will make you strong. You will make them regret hurting you." He held out his hand as Rukia looked at him. Her eyes narrowed as she stepped back.

"No! I am a Shinigami! I fight to protect!"

"And who protects you, Rukia-chan?"

"I don't need protection!"

"Oh? Momo-chan does. Momo-chan needs a lot of protecting and Hitsugaya is the man to do it, isn't he? I mean, he did choose her over you, am I right?"

Rukia felt an invisible hand close around her throat as her heart sped up.

"How did you…?"

"Doesn't that make you angry, Rukia-chan?"

"I-I-I don't care!" she said as she brought her sword up and pointed it at him. "I don't know why you're here, but you can leave!"

"Rukia-chan, I'm here to offer you power. Aizen can unlock your potential, make you stronger, make you forget all of this pain these people have put you though. All you have to do is come with me."

"Never! I will never go with you! Aizen tried to kill Renji and Ichigo and Nii-sama! Power isn't everything. Being strong isn't everything. Not when you have…not when you have people you care about." She finished in a whisper.

"Ah, and we all know how much Hitsugaya cares about you, right?" Rukia winced at the low blow.

"It doesn't matter; I will not betray my friends."

"I'm sorry, but you don't have a choice in the matter."

Rukia readied her stance, her eyes fixed on him, "Mae, Sode no Shirayuki!" He shook his head at her.

"Poor little Kuchiki," in a flash he was behind her. He brought his palm up and knocked her out in one swift movement. He caught her limp body as she lost consciousness; her sword, falling to the ground. "Trust me, Rukia-chan, you will be much better off with us." He picked her up and retrieved her Zanpaktou and smiled.

* * *

><p>"Taicho!" Matsumoto barged into the office and found Hitsugaya calmly working at his desk. The setting sun shone through the window behind him.<p>

"Matsumoto, I assume you have a reason for your outburst?"

"Hell butterfly…Yamamoto is calling an emergency meeting…All Taicho's and Fukutaicho's…are to be there." She panted out as her big chest rose and fell with each breath.

"When?" He asked as he put his brush down and stood up.

"Five minutes, sir!"

"Five minutes? Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?" He grumbled as he used shunpo once he was clear of his office door.

"I just got the message! It's not easy to run with these big boobs you know!" She pouted.

He gave her a glare as his hand reached the door to the meeting hall in the first division. He entered the hall and noticed right away that he and Matsumoto were the last to arrive. Momo smiled at him as he came in but he didn't seem to notice. His eyes wandered around the room. Byakuya stood at attention with Renji beside him. They didn't seem to be upset. That was a good sign. He looked at Ukitake, surely he would have seen Rukia since this morning, but he gave no indication anything was wrong.

He inwardly sighed. This was stupid. It was like he was waiting for everyone to point fingers at him for what he had done. He glanced at Momo who instantly smiled. He snapped to attention as he realized Yamamoto was staring at him.

"Almost late, Hitsugaya," Yamamoto addressed. "Now that we're all here, I'll get right to the point. There's been a break in the barrier."

Several gasps could be heard from a few of the Fukutaicho's as everyone else was silent.

"Ukitake, do you know where Kuchiki Rukia is?" Yamamoto continued. Toshiro's breath hitched.

"Erm, no Sir. I'm afraid I was undergoing treatment for the past several hours at the 4th and was recently awoken by the Hell Butterfly."

"I see," he replied. "I understand the majority of your division was out on a training mission today. Was Kuchiki Rukia a part of that mission?"

"No, she was the only one who stayed behind. She had some paperwork to finish up for me. Sir, what happened?" He asked as he shifted nervously. He had a sinking feeling that the breech in the barrier and his questioning about Rukia's whereabouts were related and not in a good way.

"According to the 12th Division, about an hour ago a Garganta opened up in the 13th Division training grounds. Ichimaru's reiatsu was detected."

Yamamoto was interrupted by several gasps, this time coming from a few Taicho's. Hitsugaya stood in shock. The 13th Division… Rukia would have been in no condition to…

"Soi-Fon, your report." Yamamoto said.

She cleared her throat and addressed the hall. "As soon as Ichimaru's reiatsu was detected, I along with a team was dispatched to the area. I'm afraid by the time we got there we were too late. The Garganta was closing. According to one of my men, who saw Ichimaru through the gate, he apparently got what he came for."

"What do you mean?"

"Ichimaru was carrying someone who was either dead or unconscious and in his hand was a pure white Zanpaktou."

"NO!" Renji yelled.

"Abarai," Byakuya warned.

"How awful!" Momo said.

Hitsugaya remembered the tears that fell from her beautiful eyes earlier that day. How happy she was when she saw him. How broken she was when he left her there. He suddenly felt sick to his stomach as his mind twisted with guilt.

"This is all my fault," he whispered.

"What do you mean it's all your fault?" Renji demanded stepping out of the lineup.

"She wasn't strong enough to hold him off until help got there! If it wasn't for me…"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Renji burst out again. Matsumoto put her hand on Hitsugaya's shoulders. Momo looked just as guilty.

"Would someone please tell me what is going on? How is this your fault, Hitsugaya?" Ukitake pleaded.

"I…she…" Hitsugaya turned red as all eyes were on him.

"Speak now!" Yamamoto said angrily. "We don't have time for foolishness, boy. If you have something to say do it!"

Toshiro sighed. "We've been spending a lot of time together. I guess, I led her on, or maybe I loved her too, but…I told her I couldn't return her feelings. Maybe I would have before... I had to be with Hinamori. She needed me and…I...left Rukia…I left her upset and in no condition to fight."

"You fucking bastard!" Renji yelled as he stepped out of line with his hands clenched.

"Abarai, need I remind you where you are and the fact you are addressing a superior?" Byakuya said in his cool and even tone. He turned and addressed Yamamoto, "What do you propose we do about this?"

Renji stood back in line and shut his mouth, but glared at the short Taicho.

"We have no choice. She will be deemed our first casualty of the war."

More gasps and whispers among those in the hall. Yamamoto banged his staff down on the floor, instantly quieting everyone.

"Aizen had a reason to take her, more than likely he will use her for whatever purpose that is and then dispose of her. Of course, he could turn her into an Arrancar. If that happens then she will be deemed a traitor."

"What?" Ukitake said, "If he turns her, it will be against her will! She would never betray us! To label her as a traitor…" Exhausted, he slunk back. Unohana and Isane supported him on either side.

"If he turns her she won't be the Shinigami you know nor will she ever be again. Once there is proof she is an Arrancar, she will be deemed as a traitor! You will fight her like any other enemy if she shows up at the winter war!" Yamamoto said as he slammed his staff back on the floor.

"What about a rescue effort?" Hitsugaya asked. "Why can't we assemble a small team and get her back before that happens?"

"Because I can't afford to lose any of you before this war actually starts! We cannot risk the greater good for the sake of one. Now is the time for training. If she's still alive when the war starts this winter and has been untouched, we can reassess the situation."

"But sir – "

"NO! That is final!" He said as he brought his staff down again. "Be on your guard in case any of those traitors come back! Dismissed!" Yamamoto stood up and left the room.

Byakuya stood in his position, eyes closed with Renji beside him, fuming. Ukitake had to be taken back to the 4th by Unohana and Isane, Kyoraku followed. Kenpachi and the rest filed out, all refusing to look at Hitsugaya as he stood there.

"We can't just leave her there!" Renji said.

"You heard the Soutaicho. We must follow the orders given." Byakuya said.

"How? How can you just leave her to that mad man for him to do whatever he wants to with her?" Renji pleaded, but Byakuya had his eyes closed, his expression unchanged.

"Because that is the will of the Soutaicho; we are the ones who uphold that will." He said as he turned and left the hall. "Come, Abarai, we have work that needs to be done." Byakuya silently walked past Hitsugaya not sparing him a glance.

"It's not your fault, Shiro-chan," Momo said as she put her arm around Toshiro.

"Like HELL it's not!" Renji exploded. Toshiro's eyes never left the floor. "Do you have any idea what you've done? You know what Aizen is capable of! And Rukia's just…"

"Renji…" Matsumoto said softly. She was caught between her current love and her Taicho. She put her hand on Renji's shoulder but he shrugged it off and gave her a glare.

"You knew, didn't you?"

Matsumoto gasped. "Wh-what?"

"You knew that bastard was going to destroy her, didn't you?" he sneered.

"Even if I did, what was I supposed to do?" She said as she looked at him. He was tense. He loved Rukia and has always been protective of her. She closed her eyes. She did know what was going on although she pretended she didn't. She was there when they became close, she was there when he first deceived her about his "mission", she was there when he decided he needed to be with Momo. A tear slowly fell down the side of her face. "Renji…"

"Fuck you, Ran and FUCK YOU you little bastard! If he hurts her…If she's…" Renji couldn't finish as the gravity of the situation hit him. He closed his mouth and stormed out.

The three of them were left in the now quiet hall. Yamamoto's words were still reverberating inside Toshiro's head. _Aizen had a reason to take her, more than likely he will use her for whatever purpose that is and then dispose of her. Of course, he could turn her into an Arrancar. If that happens then she will be deemed a traitor… Use her…Aizen was going to use her._ Toshiro felt his brain pound against his skull, wanting to come out. He felt dizzy and nauseous. He vaguely heard Abarai, but knew he deserved whatever it was he was spouting.

Her pale delicate features came to his mind. Her huge violet eyes pleading with him to stop, stop hurting her. His knees buckled as he fell to the floor.

Momo rubbed his back as he knelt down. Matsumoto gave him a sorrowful look before quietly leaving the hall. She knew Renji was hurting and she had to do what she could to make it up to him; especially before he did something rash.

"It's not your fault, Shiro-chan."

"Stop! Stop calling me that and stop telling me it's not my fault!" he growled as he turned on her. Her brown eyes grew big as they started to water.

"I was only trying to help you! Everyone wants to blame you, but…but it's-it's not your f-f-fault!" she wailed as the tears were now flowing freely. Toshiro looked at her and started to feel sick again.

"I need to go lay down for a while. I need to think." He said his voice low.

"O-ok," Momo said as she dried her eyes. She sniffed as she brought herself back under control. She smiled at him. "A good nap will clear your mind and you'll see it's not your fault and you'll feel better!"

"Are you going to be ok heading back on your own?"

"Of course."

"Fine, I'll see you later then, Momo." He walked out of the meeting hall. The sun was almost set and as he turned and looked out over the city he realized it wasn't as bright and colorful as it used to be.

* * *

><p>"Kuchiki Rukia…" Gin said. "You were set on killing her not too long ago and now you have me retrieve her. What do you have in mind?" He asked with interest. Aizen sat on his throne looking smug.<p>

"I take it she is with Aporro?"

"Yes. He was quite excited to get his hands on her when I brought her in."

The man smiled. "It's her tie with the Hogyoku that has me interested."

"What tie? I thought she was just the container?"

"That was the intention when it was placed there, but something happened along the way. Maybe it was the fear of her execution that woke it up a bit and became a part of her."

"A part of her?"

"Self perseverance, Gin."

"So what now? Are you going to give it back to her?"

"No. My plans with it have not changed. I've just added a little detour."

"Oh?"

"We're going to complete the process and extract her full potential."

"You're going to turn her into one of them?"

"Yes. As it stands now what we have can barely keep up with the rest of the Gotei 13. She will be the key to victory. Not only will she be the most powerful Arrancar in our arsenal, but because of who she is, she will cause all kinds of chaos for them. Can you imagine Abarai raising his Zanpaktou towards her?"

Gin shared his leaders smile. "Why no, no I can't. And that brother and Taicho of hers," he added as he nodded.

"Indeed. They'll be more set on trying to save her."

They both laughed.

"They won't be able to undo your handiwork. Central 46, when it's reestablished, won't allow her in Soul Society because of what she will be. She will have nowhere to go."

"Which will keep her in line with us."

"Ah." Gin smiled at her as he stepped closer. "I don't suppose we can have a little fun with her first?"

An evil grin spread across Aizen's face as he looked at her. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt, much." His smile grew as he heard Rukia's screams from down the hall.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Fubuki is Blizzard – you'll see why that's a good thing to know later in the chapter :P **

**Thank you all for giving me so many reviews and alerts! That's amazing for a 1****st**** chapter You guys know how to really make my day and I appreciate you all!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 2<p>

She sat in the corner of her dark cell, her knees drawn up to her chest. She stared into the blackness, unmoving.

Waiting.

Waiting for something, her rescue? No. She had given up on that a long time ago. No one was coming for her. She knew that before they invaded that part of her. No. Waiting for her demise, waiting for fate to deal its final blow was more likely. However it happened, she didn't care. She had once hoped it would be soon. Even that ran out. There was no hope. Not here.

Nothing had meaning.

The pain was intense and blinding, she couldn't move. To do so would be catastrophic. She learned early on how to stay completely still and she could for days if it meant the pain was less.

Granz stuck her with so many needles, injected her a hundred times over. She would scream, pass out and wake up screaming again. She felt like she was being ripped apart and then reassembled but _wrong. _

She was changing, that much she knew, and it was beyond their expectation. Aizen visited the lab more often than not. They expected her to be a monster, an Arrancar. They thought it would be an easy thing, but something went wrong. Or was it right?

She didn't know.

She lost conscious as her brain was drilled into, her thoughts and memories no longer her own as they were erased one by one. She couldn't bear the pain as Granz ran experiment after experiment; injecting this and that into her arms, torso and legs, _changing_ her into something else.

Her heart was the first to go. The tell tale hollow hole appearing above her left breast, _gaping_ in all of its hideous glory for everyone to see.

She was to be reborn, they said. She was no longer Kuchiki Rukia but something better, stronger, faster and more dangerous than ever. An Arrancar, but not quite, she was _different_.

In her mind, she was reduced to nothing, knowing nothing but pain. Rukia no longer existed. She was a blank slate for Aizen to play with, a mind and body for him to control in every way.

She was the Zero Espada.

* * *

><p>"Taicho! We have orders!" Matsumoto said as she came crashing into the office. Toshiro frowned as she handed him a small stack of papers.<p>

He had come from a meeting not too long ago regarding stronger hollows being seen in the Living World. He didn't bother reading through the pages as he already knew what they contained; orders to assess the situation in the Living world.

He set the orders down on his desk and looked at Matsumoto. "Gather the others, we leave in an hour."

"Yes, sir!"

Toshiro closed his eyes. He hoped this would go smoothly, although having to be the one to tell Ichigo…

"Shiro?"

He sighed and looked up.

"I heard about the mission. I was under the impression you got to choose your team."

He knew this was coming. "Yes, Hinamori, I did."

"Why didn't you choose me?" She asked sadly. She looked at him with her big doe eyes. She was sad he would choose to leave her behind.

"Because after Aizen's betrayal – "

"That's not been proven! Ichimaru could still be behind all of this!" She fiercely interjected.

"Because after Aizen's betrayal," he reiterated, "you have been under a large amount of stress. I think it would be better if you stayed here under the care of the 4th."

"But I want to be with you, Shiro," she insisted. She stood in front of his desk, hands clasped together, pleading.

"No, Momo. Not this time."

She looked down, dejected. She tried to hide her eyes as they filled with tears. He didn't want her. She slowly nodded her acceptance. "Can you walk me back to the 4th?"

Toshiro stood and took her hand.

"I'm sorry I'm such a burden to you, Shiro," she said as they left his office.

"Don't be silly."

"I know we disagree on Aizen-sama's intentions and I just wanted to thank you…for sticking by my side when others wouldn't."

"We're all on your side."

"That's not true," she said as she let her tears fall. "A-A-Abarai won't e-even l-lo-ook at me," she sniffed. Toshiro remained impassive. The big baboon wouldn't look at him either. However, he was coming on the mission. "I-I think he bl-blames me for what happened to…to…Kuchiki-san." His body tensed at her name. He stopped walking.

Rukia.

It had been months since he allowed himself to think of her. Security was tightened, punishments threatened if anyone was to mount a rescue attempt. It had been decided she would be the first official casualty of the war. He had hoped her brother would contest it, or that Abarai would throw a fit, but none of that happened. That's not to say they were happy with the decision. Byakuya took the "wait and see" approach while Abarai bounced between grief and fury. The latter part directed towards Toshiro.

"He doesn't blame you, he blames me," Toshiro said slowly, "as he should."

Momo looked at him and frowned. She dried her eyes and huffed. "You're not back to that again, are you? It's not your fault she left with Ichimaru-sama."

Toshiro looked at her as he narrowed his eyes.

"_Left_ with him? You think she left with him willingly?" he said coolly. He didn't want to get into her delusions now.

Momo looked at the ground. "I think it's possible," she whispered. Suddenly she felt a huge tug on her arm as Toshiro took off for the 4th. "Hey!"

They were silent until they reached the doorway of the medical facility. His thoughts were scattered. There was no way she left on her own accord but he didn't have time to argue with Momo about it. It would have been pointless anyway considering she still sided with Aizen after everything that's happened. "I have a mission to prepare for. I'll see you when I get back."

"Be careful, Shiro!" She said as she leaned in and kissed him. He gently pushed her away and took off to the main gate.

Renji, Rangiku, Ikkaku and Yumichika were already there waiting. Renji scowled.

"Let's go," he said as the doors opened.

* * *

><p>"Let's go," Gin said as he opened the cell door, smile on his face. He ignored the sudden chill as it spilled out from the room into the hallway. "You were amazing during training. I knew you would kill them all, but so fast?" He marveled at her as she unfolded herself from her usual sitting position. Something left over from when she <em>remembered <em>he was sure. Granz had told them that mannerisms and memory were separate parts of the brain.

She opened her violet eyes and stared at nothing as she moved. He caught a glimpse of her creamy white leg as she stretched it out before putting her foot on the frozen floor. Her hakama fell into place, covering it. Aizen had chosen her training uniform. It was the same basic Shinigami uniform with reverse colors. Rukia's instinct clung to the familiar, like the way she moved and sat.

Gin had thought with all of the modifications Granz had done she would be different. Physically she looked the same; however from what he had seen that morning, looks were very deceiving. Mentally, she had a tactical mind for fighting, something they instilled in her. However, it was still being constructed, the rest was instinct and mush.

She didn't speak, didn't look at him. She stood and followed behind him to Aizen's throne room. Ulquiorra and Yammi were there talking to Aizen about their latest mission. As they entered the room, Gin quickly took his place on Aizen's right side. Tosen was already there on his left. Rukia walked to the front, ignoring Ulquiorra and Yammi as she walked between them. She stood before Aizen and bowed down.

He smiled at her. "You may rise, Zero," he said as he used his new name for her. She did as she was told. He nodded to the two behind her to continue.

Looking a bit perturbed, Ulquiorra continued with his report. "There are several humans with reiatsu in Karakura. Their powers are different, some are stronger than others. The stronger ones seem to revolve around one person. Kurosaki Ichigo."

Aizen's gaze flashed to Rukia's face which remained passive at the mention of Ichigo's name. His smile widened.

"Did you engage Kurosaki?"

"I did! He was weak!" Yammi stated with a grin. Ulquiorra frowned slightly in disgust which did not go unnoticed.

"Speak, Ulquiorra."

"Kurosaki Ichigo is hardly a threat. I do not understand why you have wasted your time worrying about him."

"He is beneath your level. Is that what you're telling me?"

"He is worthless trash," he replied with indifference. Aizen looked at Rukia.

"And what do you think, Zero?"

"Any and all threats to the mission should be neutralized as soon as possible," she whispered without raising her eyes. They remained fixed to a spot on the floor in front of Aizen's chair.

"Would you agree, Ulquiorra?"

"I do not believe any of them are threats," he stated firmly.

"It matters not. You know what I am after and what needs to be done to obtain it," he said. He stood up and walked down the stairs in front of his throne. He stopped in front of Rukia and placed his hand under her chin. He gently lifted her head and smiled at her.

"I was impressed with your training session this morning," he said gently. He bent down and kissed her forehead.

"Aizen-sama," Rukia whispered her face void of all emotion. Just his presence brought calm to her chaotic mind.

"I look forward to this afternoon's session," he said as he released her. "Get her ready, Gin. I want more of them this time."

* * *

><p>"Oi! What are you guys doing here?" Ichigo demanded as he entered his room. Matsumoto, Renji and Yumichika were on his bed, Ikkaku was going through his desk and Toshiro was on the windowsill, looking out over the town.<p>

Ichigo dropped his book bag by the closet and pushed Ikkaku out of his chair and sat down. He looked at the five new comers and sighed. He blinked and looked again.

"What is this about and why isn't Rukia with you?" He eyed Renji as he asked the last part of his question. Renji scowled and turned towards the window.

"There's been an influx of hollow activity here that needs to be investigated. Apparently there's a new, stronger type of hollow." Toshiro said as he took in Ichigo's bandages.

"I'll say, those two were something else. They – "

"You've seen them?" Toshiro interrupted. Ichigo glanced at Renji who was still scowling.

"Yes, I've seen them," he said cautiously.

"I need to know everything you do about them."

Ichigo looked back at Toshiro and frowned. "Where's Rukia?"

"That's not important – "

"The hell it's not!"

"The people of this town – "

"Have been taken care of and protected by me. The representative you sent as Rukia's replacement sucks. Now, I'm not telling you one more thing until you tell me where Rukia is."

Toshiro pinched the bridge of his nose and hesitated. He really wasn't looking forward to this, especially in front of Abarai. "Ichimaru took her to Hueco Mundo several months ago." The words felt sour in his mouth as he said them. He briefly thought of Momo suggesting she willingly went with the monster.

Ichigo looked like someone punched him in the gut. He turned towards Renji, "You didn't go after her?"

"We were forbidden. We were told that any defiance of the order would be considered an act of treason against Soul Society. They've deemed her the first casualty of the war," Renji said bitterly.

Toshiro closed his eyes as the memory of that morning surfaced his mind. The way she looked at him…the way he left her…

"How long ago?" Ichigo asked quietly when he found his voice.

"Almost three months," Matsumoto said after a while when she realized Toshiro and Renji wouldn't…maybe couldn't answer.

Ichigo looked like he was going to say something else but changed his mind. He looked at Ikkaku and told his tale of the two Arrancar he met. How the one was unbelievably strong, how the other just stood there as if he was assessing something.

He told them how even in Bankai, he wasn't able to do much and it took Yoruichi and Urahara to come to the rescue that day. He frowned. "They're strong."

Toshiro looked at his team. "I want you to pair up, stay together and start your patrols. Matsumoto, I want you with Abarai. If anyone sees anything I want to know about it."

"What about you?" Matsumoto asked him.

"I'll be checking the area between your patrols. Not far from either team. Kurosaki, you might want to tell your friends to pair up. From the sound of it, they might strike again.

"Huh? Yeah, ok."

Renji gave Ichigo a nod, Ikkaku and Yumichika gave him a punch and Matsumoto gave him a hug as they left. Toshiro stayed where he was.

"I take it there's something you're not telling me. The reason why Renji is pissed off at you?" Ichigo asked as he shut the door. Toshiro stared out the window.

"I am to blame for Rukia's capture," he said quietly. Ichigo clenched his fists but said nothing. "We've been training together for a while, since her rescue, since the Bount affair and we…we were…" he sighed.

"You were close to her," Ichigo finished for him.

"But I couldn't…return her feelings. Not that I didn't want too. I did, I do," he sighed again. "I made a promise a long time ago to someone."

"Che…This isn't the first time someone promises something to someone and she gets screwed," he said as he ran his hand through his orange hair. Toshiro closed his eyes and thought about Rukia's execution, how her brother treated her. The comparison made him sick.

"So you told her of this promise and then what?"

"I left her. Not too long after it was discovered Ichimaru Gin was in the area. They caught him, holding her unconscious as the Garganta closed," he turned from the window and looked at Ichigo. "I hurt her and left her. She was in no condition to fight off anyone, let alone Ichimaru."

In a flash Ichigo had moved, he grabbed Toshiro by his collar and had him slammed up against the closet door opposite the window. His other fist poised, ready to strike. Toshiro didn't struggle or resist in any way. Ichigo looked at the closet, closed his eyes and slowly released him.

"Does anyone have any theories as to why she was taken? What Aizen wants with her?" he asked, trying to calm himself. Rukia wouldn't have like him beating up on him.

"No. Kurotsuchi thinks because the Hogyoku was inside of her that something must have happened. She might have become more than just a container for it."

"So they think she's still alive," he said as he breathed a little easier.

"Until her usefulness disappears," Toshiro said bitterly as he thought of Momo.

* * *

><p>"You are astounding, Zero!" Aizen said from his spot above the training area. He was very pleased as he looked at the carnage that was strewn about the frozen arena floor. Twenty hollows of varying degrees of strength were set loose for Rukia to defeat. Without breaking a sweat, Rukia demolished all with lightening speed.<p>

Aizen was seated in the observatory area several meters above the ground. Gin, Tosen and a handful of Espada were also in attendance. Stark looked bored as always, Tia and Ulquiorra watched with detached interest. Granz couldn't help but smile over what he called "his" creation; although he would never tell Aizen that.

Grimmjow was restless. "This is a waste of time!" He said as he sat back in his seat. "Is this all we get to do? Watch her kill everything in site?"

Aizen narrowed his eyes and turned to face him. "Would you rather go down there and fight her?"

Grimmjow's eyes flitted to the raven haired beauty. She stood in the center of the arena, sword at her side. Her uniform was covered in blood; none her own. She stood with a graceful air about her, like she always had. Her face, blank of all emotion, her eyes, slightly dull, her mind set to kill, stood absolutely still. He cleared his throat before sitting back in his chair.

"No," he said quietly. "Excuse my interruption," he added for good measure, frowning. Ulquiorra huffed and turned his emerald eyes back to Rukia.

Aizen smiled and gave a nod to an Arrancar on the floor. He opened another set of doors letting another twenty Arrancar class hollows into the arena. They gathered around Rukia who remained still.

"If you want a treat, you should have her release," Granz said excitedly. Aizen turned to him and lifted an eyebrow.

"You got her to release?"

"Yes!"

Aizen turned towards the Arrancar on the floor and nodded at him again. He walked a few paces and opened another door. Thirty more Arrancar class hollow filed into the arena. Rukia remained as she was.

"Zero!" Aizen called down. Rukia's eyes flicked to his. "Release and destroy," he said as he leaned forward. "Gin…time her."

From their advantage point they only saw her lips barely move as she whispered her release command. "Fubuki," she said as the arena immediately turned white. It was nearly impossible to see. Aizen narrowed his eyes as he tried to find her, Granz laughed.

"What is this?" Aizen asked.

"This is what I call 'frozen death'," Granz said as the snow stopped. Rukia was again in the center of the arena, same position as before. Fifty more bodies lay at her feet. A chill went down Grimmjow's spine. He had never seen anything like it. Even Stark had a look of interest on his face.

"Two minutes fifty four seconds," Gin said.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Grimmjow is an interesting character. While he is big and badass, he also knows his place to an extent. It was mentioned that Grimmjow bowed down too easily and acted more like a scared kitty ( smile ), it's not really like that at all… The Zero position is the highest rank among them. The position itself is respected and is a little something to fear, not just the one who fills it. Grimmjow gives Ulquiorra and Tosen a hard time (in the manga), he does not mess with Tia, Stark or Baraggan… My take is that is because they were too powerful and he knew it. He's cocky, not stupid.**

**Rukia, by her own right, is Zero because of what has been done to her. Is she more powerful than they are? Yes, hence the reason she is Zero. However, she does have her weakness as they all do. Power is not without great fall…as you will see…**

**Besides, even Yammi (the true Zero in the manga) fell to two Captains… **

**If you don't usually read my opening comments, you might want to start over the next couple of chapters as I get into a few phrases. You'll probably want to know what they mean and I will address them at the beginning of the chapter. But if you don't read them, you won't see this will you? Ah well…**

**As always – thank you all very much for your reviews, your alerts and just you out there who is doing nothing but reading. I really appreciate you all… **

**(Come here DeathslittleBirdie, I owe you a glomp!)**

* * *

><p>Chapter 3<p>

"What do you think about all of this, Renji?" Ichigo asked him. It was the following morning of their arrival after their first night of patrol. Everyone met back in Ichigo's room, gave their report and went back out to get some rest. Matsumoto went to shadow Orihime, Ikkaku and Yumichika went to find proper shelter for their rest period and Toshiro said he was going back out for a walk.

Renji scowled. "I don't like it."

"I mean about Rukia."

"So did I." Renji sat back and leaned against the closet door. He closed his eyes and let the memories he's been suppressing surface as he filled Ichigo in on their friend. "Ever since the execution and the rescue, she's become a new woman. Still annoying as ever, but she had a new outlook on her duties and her role in performing them.

"She asked Hitsugaya to train her since their elements are so close together. At first he didn't want to but relented. That's how they started out. You know Rukia, once she gets under your skin it's hard to let go of her," he smiled sadly. "They started spending more and more time together and it went beyond the training. She was opening up to him in ways I have not seen from her since our days in Rukongai before our friends died."

"She was falling in love," Ichigo said.

"Yes. From what Ran told me, he was starting to as well. Or so we thought."

"So what happened?"

"Hinamori happened. After Aizen betrayed everyone, her the most, she started breaking down. After everything that happened, everything he did to her, she believed he was innocent. Before Rukia's execution he tried to kill her. The 4th was able to save her but she was in a coma. It was during that time, Rukia and Hitsugaya-Taicho started their training sessions. Once Momo woke up she started to cling to Hitsugaya and he started spending less time with Rukia, and then finally broke it off."

"The morning she was taken."

"Yeah, that's the gist of it."

"Che…" Ichigo said as he shook his head. "She always ends up with the short end of the stick, doesn't she?"

"She would hit you for the short remark," Renji said. They both gave a short laugh. "I don't know what Aizen wants her for, but when the time is right, I'm going in and will get her back."

"Count me in," Ichigo said.

Up on the roof, Toshiro stared blankly at the clouds passing by. He had heard their conversation and knew every bit of it was true except for one part. He had already fallen for her. He had fallen hard, and he pushed it away, letting it all go.

* * *

><p>Gin and Granz left the arena with Zero. She had just finished yet another training exercise. Ulquiorra wasn't required to be there, but he was curious. Since the introduction training session where they all had to see her, he had a slight fascination with her. She was small, easily underestimated and it was interesting to see how she used it to her advantage.<p>

His eyes caught movement down on the floor. A slight frown creased his lips as he saw who it was, sifting through the frozen bodies.

"Looking for a way to become the new Zero?" Ulquiorra asked as he entered the bottom floor. Grimmjow appeared behind a pillar of ice.

"What's it to you?"

"Her fight was impressive," Ulquiorra stated as he kicked a frozen arm out of the way. The ice broke and the arm vanished.

"Hmph, it's not like you to give someone credit."

"I didn't think I was giving her credit, I just said her fight was impressive."

Grimmjow raised his head. "She was nothing before that rock."

"Like you?"

"No! I was strong and became stronger! She was a mere Shinigami, a nothing! Pathetic and weak. Why did Aizen make her Zero? If he can make something like that, why can't he do that for the rest of us?"

"Jealous?"

Grimmjow sneered, "You act like you're better than any of us. I can take you out any time."

Ulquiorra turned his head and met his stare. "Know your place Sexta, I am out of your league and Aizen's plans are beyond your capability of understanding."

"Don't underestimate me!" He said as he stormed out the arena.

* * *

><p>Granz held up a syringe and pushed the plunger, releasing the air. He was in a small exam room in his lab. Two walls were lined with shelves packed full with jars and bottles of various liquids and materials. The other wall held a counter and a sink. A gurney type bed sat to one side. Rukia was seated on the bed, her back straight, eyes on the floor, her hands loosely in her lap.<p>

"The surgery went well, however it is a fascinating organ, constantly regenerating itself," he said as he tapped on the side, making sure all of the air was out. He turned and gestured to Rukia. She turned slightly as she moved to lift up her hair exposing her neck. The back of it was tattooed with a "0". Granz plunged the needle into the base of her skull. Rukia remained still.

"So the injections?" Gin asked.

"Are necessary for now. They keep her complacent, in control."

"And without them?"

"Her mind will become chaos as she tries to think for herself. As the electrical connections try to reestablish themselves she will be in an unbelievable amount of pain. She will go mad if she doesn't die from the pain first."

"Aizen knows this?"

"He prefers this method, less chance of them turning her against us if she were to be recaptured."

Gin nodded. "How often does she need these treatments?"

"I've been injecting her every other day. Were something to happen, she can last a week, maybe two without them before things start to get painful."

"Fascinating," Gin whispered as he took a step closer to her. Her hair in place, hands back in her lap, eyes fixated to a spot on the floor. Gin moved and gently brushed the hair out of her face only for it to return. He moved his hand in front of her eyes which did not move or acknowledge he was there. He let his hand fall to the collar of her uniform. He gently pulled the material back on the left side, exposing the hole in her chest. He smiled at her. "Zero," he said. Her eyes flashed to his and held them. His smile widened. "Come, it's time to rest now," he said as he led her to her cell.

* * *

><p>The cell was frozen in a layer of ice. Gin felt the chill as he opened the door to her cell. Without a word, she slipped in and sat on her bed. Her back to the wall, she drew her legs up and rested her head on her knees.<p>

"Sleep, Zero," Gin commanded as he closed the door. Rukia closed her eyes.

Her head hurt. She didn't like the shot, but it lessened the pain in her head. She was surprised the pink haired man would lessen the pain. He usually brought the pain; the blinding, debilitating pain. He enjoyed it as he changed her, took things from her she knew she would never get back. But she didn't know what. She couldn't remember anything of her life before the pain.

_Before_ was gone. She wasn't sure how long it had been since _becoming_. Time meant nothing and she didn't know how to keep track of it. The smiling man did, Ichimaru-sama. He would call out times as she trained. She thought he might have known her in the _before _because he had tried to call her by a name that was not her own. _Rukia_…

Aizen-sama had always called her "Zero" and spoke to her with kind words. She doubted Aizen-sama knew her _before_. She briefly wondered who _Rukia_ was as the pain lessened and the cloud moved into her head wiping out all thoughts of _Rukia_ and _before_.

* * *

><p>Days later Toshiro was in Orihime's apartment in the spare room they used to communicate with Soul Society via a huge screen that took up an entire wall. Momo had requested and was granted time to use the communication system to talk to him.<p>

He looked at her standing in front of the screen. She looked stressed out. Her hair was lifeless much like her eyes, dull and flat. She had lost some weight as well. She almost looked like a child playing dress-up.

She smiled for him.

"How are you feeling, Momo?"

"I would feel a lot better if you were by my side, Shiro. I miss you."

"I, uh, miss you too."

"Have you had any luck?"

"No. Nothing yet as I just reported," he said a little impatiently. He hated repeating himself.

"Does that mean you can come home soon?" She asked hopeful.

"I doubt it. Kurosaki has seen two of them. I'm sure we'll be seeing them again soon."

Her eyes widened as she tried to contain her excitment, "Maybe Aizen-sama broke out of his cell and killed them! Maybe he's trying to get back as we speak! Maybe – "

"Hinamori!" Toshiro yelled. That seemed to have snapped her back into focus as she stopped and stared at him. Tears were welling up in her eyes.

"I miss you, Shiro-chan."

"I'll be back soon."

"And then we'll be together again, right? Like you promised?"

"Like I promised…" he said with a small sigh as his thoughts turn to Rukia. He blinked and looked at Momo. He tried to focus.

"Aizen-sama promised he wouldn't hurt me, Shiro. He promised. You're not going to hurt me, right?"

"I would never – "

"You have to promise me! Promise me right now! Promise you won't hurt him! You won't hurt Aizen-sama! This isn't his fault I know it! I just have to get there and prove it! I'll prove it to you, but you can't hurt him!"

Toshiro stared in shock as Isane and another from the 4th stepped in and took hold of her arms. They pulled her away from the screen as she rattled on. She broke their grip and ran to the screen.

"Promise me you won't hurt Aizen-sama!" She screamed as Isane and the other grabbed her again.

"I'm sorry, Taicho, I think the stress has gotten to her," Isane offered. "We're taking her back to the 4th now."

The screen went dark.

Toshiro sighed and closed his eyes. She wasn't getting better. Aizen was going to pay for what he did to her. He clenched his hands into fists as he imagined facing off with him. He frowned as he imagined Momo getting in the way of his blade, protecting her precious Aizen. A sword runs though him, a woman laughs. He turns around and finds himself looking into a pair of violet orbs.

Rukia.

Her face is distorted; bone fragments cover half of her face. She's laughing as she charges a cero… _"You left me to them and look what they've done to me…"_

Toshiro opens his eyes as a chill runs down his spine.

"No," he whispers. His legs feel weak; he stumbles before he falls to the floor. "No," he says again. He holds his head in his hands as he pulls his hair. He blinks as the memory of that morning returns full force. He treated her as if she meant nothing to him. "No," he says again as he sees her in Ichimaru's arms, unconscious. He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to rid the image from his mind. Then he sees her again, morphed into an Arrancar and laughing at him.

He screams.

"Taicho!" Matsumoto calls out as she bursts into the room. Immediately at his side she shakes him awake. He looks confused as he opens his eyes. "You had a bad dream. Are you ok?"

"Dream?" He asks as he gets up off the small couch. He was in the communications room. He frowns. "I don't remember falling asleep."

"Che…that's not surprising," she said as she waved her hand. "You've been on patrol non-stop for days."

"Rangiku!" Renji yelled. His voice filled the room through the communicator Matsumoto wore. "They're here!"

Toshiro's eyes widened as he turned his earpiece on. He cell phone started beeping. "Where are you?" he demanded as he shunpo'd out of the apartment complex and onto the roof. He scanned his surroundings, not seeing anything.

"Southeast from your position," Renji said.

"We have some here, northeast," Ikkaku said. Toshiro narrowed his eyes as he caught a glimpse of someone fighting to the southwest. Were they being surrounded? He was about to take off when he heard a Garganta open behind him.

Toshiro watched as three Arrancar stepped though; two male, one small female. Toshiro held his breath as he thought of Rukia. He quickly looked at her eyes, fearing his dream would become reality. He relaxed a tiny bit when he saw that her eyes were green.

"I'm fighting," Ikkaku said almost happily.

"A Garganta just opened in the northwest," Toshiro said. "You're on your own."

"Understood," three voices reported.

"Taicho!" Matsumoto said as she stood next to him.

* * *

><p>"What?" Aizen asked displeasure in his voice. He was in his throne room, seated; Gin and Tosen standing on either side. Ulquiorra was in a submissive stance in front of the throne.<p>

"Grimmjow took eight of the new Arrancars to the living world," he reported.

"What for?" asked Gin.

"Someone heard him mention taking out the extra Shinigami they have stationed there."

"On his own?" Aizen crushed the glass he was holding in his hand. The broken glass sounded like chimes as it hit the stone floor beneath him. "Go and retrieve him. I want those that went with him to perish for their disloyalty to me."

"Yes, Aizen-sama," Ulquiorra said as he bowed. He turned to leave before Gin's voice stopped him.

"Should he take Zero with him?" Gin asked. "I'm sure those Shinigami have been training very hard. We should make them realize it's not enough, ne?"

Aizen thought and then smiled. "Indeed." He turned to Ulquiorra, "Take Zero."

"Yes, Aizen-sama," he replied.

* * *

><p>Matsumoto was pinned down on the rooftop of Orihime's apartment complex by the small female Arrancar. Toshiro was in the air, panting. His Shikai released but doing little damage to the two males. Ichigo, already in Bankai, had his own hands full with Grimmjow on the street below. Two streets over, Renji was fighting two of his own.<p>

"Sir, there's another Garganta opening to the south," Ikkaku said.

"Damn it!" Toshiro spat. He had called for the limiter to be removed and for reinforcements from soul society and was thoroughly pissed off his call had been unanswered. "Regroup behind the school yard, less humans there!"

Three voices came over the ear piece, "Understood."

Suddenly, everyone froze as a strong wave of reiatsu blew in from the south. It was cold and powerful.

"Aw, fuck," Grimmjow said. Ichigo panted and looked at him.

"Fuck!" Ikkaku screamed over the communication device.

"How beautiful!" Yumichika said.

"What is going on?" Toshiro demanded as the Arrancar he was fighting suddenly backed off and looked to Grimmjow for guidance. Matsumoto stood up and went to Toshiro's side.

"Espada…defeated…own," Ikkaku said as his voice broke up, "Taicho! …-kia! Did you…me? It's…"

"What? You're breaking up! Repeat!"

Grimmjow seemed to be debating something before narrowing his eyes at Ichigo. "Guess I only have a few minutes left." He charged a cero in his hand, Ichigo's eyes widened. He braced for an impact that never came. The next thing he knew, he was flying backwards, Grimmjow was going in the opposite direction.

Ichigo opened his eyes as Grimmjow was being held by an Espada he had seen once before.

"Lord Aizen is not happy," Ulquiorra said. Grimmjow huffed.

"If you had given me a few more minutes I would have wiped the floor with these guys!"

"That is not what has been directed."

The air dropped fifty degrees. With their targets still glued to one spot, Toshiro and Matsumoto went to help Ichigo stand. The ground froze beneath them as ice shards flew out from a spot in the dark and took out the remaining Arrancar with deadly precision. As their heads separated from their bodies, one figure emerged from the darkness.

Toshiro gasped as his eyes grew wide. Ichigo's jaw dropped and Matsumoto stood still, stunned.

Rukia emerged from the darkened alley. Instead of her training uniform, Aizen had wished for her to wear something else for the mission. He kept the white hakama for her since she was used to fighting in it, but changed the outer robe. She now wore the equivalent of a white tube top with a short jacket over it. Her midsection and more importantly, according to Aizen, her hollow hole was exposed.

Toshiro's throat went dry as he stared at her. He couldn't take his eyes off of her since she emerged from the alley. Her face, her hair, her eyes, everything was the same as he remembered. His eyes fell to the hole in her chest and he felt sick.

Was it too late? Had they lost her? This shouldn't have happened. It wasn't supposed to be this way. If he had only told her he loved her she wouldn't have been alone and upset that morning. If only…

This was his fault. He had to fix this; he had to get her back. He watched as she turned her head, her face puzzled.

Ulquiorra cocked his head to the side. "Good work, Zero. They are all taken care of."

She glanced at Ulquiorra before sniffing the air.

"Not all of them." Her eyes locked with Ichigo's and using Sonido she was in front of him. Her eyes narrowed. "Hollow," she said softly, cocking her head. "Yet not."

Toshiro stayed completely still as he watched Rukia look over Ichigo. He was surprised to find himself annoyed that she didn't spare him a passing glance. But then, why would she? Even if she remembered, he was the one who left her; he was the one who hurt her. Did she remember? Did she know who they were? He could hear his heart pounding in his chest.

Ichigo stood there, mouth open. He couldn't believe she was there, in front of him, wearing… _that. _

"Ru-kia..." He searched her eyes looking for the Rukia he knew. Whoever this was looked like Rukia but her eyes…were cold and hollow.

She slowly lifted her small thin arm and touched the blood that was dripping from Ichigo's head. Her sleeve slid back, exposing her arm revealing bits and pieces of hollow bone attached to it resembling a skeletal arm. "Human, Shinigami, hollow," she said.

A senkaimon gate opened close to the alley where Rukia came from. Ten Shinigami emerged, swords in the air ready to strike.

"Zero, destroy the new Shinigami," Ulquiorra said.

Rukia broke her gaze with Ichigo and stomped her foot down. A sheet of snow flowed from her foot and extended to the new Shinigami, holding them in place. She used Sonido and drew her sword. With one strike, she was able to decapitate two heads at the same time. As they fell, with her return swing, she aimed lower, severing the legs of two more Shinigami. She blocked one man's sword as she sliced the neck of another with the shards of ice that were now protruding from her knuckles.

Her dance was graceful. Her dance was captivating as Ichigo and the others were too stunned to move. Her dance was deadly as the last body fell to the ground. In a flash, she was by Ulquiorra's side once more.

"Shinigami-hollow?" she asked referring to Ichigo as she pointed her sword at him. They could clearly hear the blood of her kills drip from it to the ground.

Orihime came running with Renji in tow from the street behind them. She looked at Ichigo and jumped in front of him, her hands on her hair pins.

"No, Kuchiki-san!" She cried. Ulquiorra remembered her. She was the one who had healing powers. Not a threat to Zero.

"No," Ulquiorra replied as he turned to her. "We accomplished what Lord Aizen wished. He wanted survivors." He lifted his hand and opened a Garganta.

With Orihime's and Renji's arrival, the spell over the others vanished. Toshiro blinked. He still didn't believe what he saw. None the less, he cleared his throat.

"Rukia!" He shouted. He had hoped she would turn. He couldn't remember what the other one called her. "Rukia," he tried again. This time, she stopped at the entrance. Ulquiorra glanced at her. Toshiro held his breath as their eyes met. He remembered many times looking into those eyes.

"That is not my name," she said before turning away. The Garganta closed.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: "All hollows have masks…" According to Bleach Wiki… I beg to differ. Nnoitora had teeth in his hole behind his patch – not a mask. So, before someone asks let me head this off… Rukia is different. She is NOT the typical "visored" (Shinigami turned hollow). It will be explained more later, but for now, know that she is different. She does have hollow bone and a hole.**

* * *

><p>Chapter 4<p>

No one moved long after the Garganta closed. Their minds still processing what they had just seen. Ikkaku and Yumichika appeared and looked at the group.

"I take it you've seen her," Ikkaku said.

"She was almost beautiful," Yumichika stated. "The way she took out the Arrancar."

"Why did she do that?" Renji asked. "I mean, why start a fight and then send someone in and take out your team while they're winning."

"Winning means nothing unless it's on Aizen's terms. Apparently the one called 'Grimmjow' acted out on his own," Matsumoto said.

"Kurosaki-kun, let me heal you!" Orihime cried. She motioned for the others to get him lying down.

"I'm fine, Inoue," Ichigo said as he turned towards Toshiro. "Now what?" He asked.

Toshiro turned and looked at the orange haired man, still a bit dazed. "We get her back," he said as he gripped his hands into fists.

"She didn't know who we were. Her eyes…. Getting her back isn't going to be easy. Definitely not as easy as it would have been if you had gone after her as soon as she was taken," Ichigo accused.

Toshiro's anger grew until it snapped. "Do you think I don't know this? Why don't you come out and say it, Kurosaki! I'm responsible! I know I am responsible! I know I should have just gone after her and dealt with the consequences later! Do you think I stand here happy about anything that has happened?"

"No one cares if you're happy or not. And it's obvious you didn't care about her or you would have gone after her!"

"That's not true!" He yelled as he lunged after Ichigo. Matsumoto, Ikkaku and Yumichika grabbed onto him before he could make a strike. Renji placed himself in front of Ichigo and put a hand on his chest.

"Fighting between ourselves isn't going to save Rukia," he said. "Finding a way to Hueco Mundo will."

Toshiro freed himself from the others and took off.

"Taicho!" Matsumoto said sadly. She looked at Ichigo. "You're wrong about him not caring."

* * *

><p>"Speak," Aizen commanded. Rukia, Ulquiorra and Grimmjow returned to the throne room and were kneeling before him. Aizen had just seen everything that happened through Ulquiorra's eye and was addressing Grimmjow.<p>

Grimmjow stood. "I thought I could take out the new Shinigami and the humans you were worried about."

"So you acted on your own, without my direction."

"I was helping you. That guy, Kurosaki Ichigo, he's not just a human, he's – "

"I know what he is. And in spite of your lack of intelligence, I will tell you this once. There is no one that 'worries' me. I have an extensive plan that goes well beyond your miserable life. If you want to be a part of it, you will obey me or you will be destroyed."

"He should already be destroyed for his disobedience!" Tosen stated.

"I acted! That's more than I can say for you! All you do is stand there next to Lord Aizen looking like you're important," he sneered as he moved towards Tosen.

"You cannot pardon this one!" Tosen insisted as he pointed at Grimmjow.

Grimmjow moved to strike, as he extended his arm he stopped inches from where Tosen was standing. He watched as his newly severed arm flew across the room. Rukia stood on his other side looking at him intently, blood dripping from her sword.

"You BITCH!" he screamed as what happened registered in his mind.

"Careful now," Aizen said. "You're lucky I don't have her cut you down completely. If you had so much as touched Tosen, you would not have been forgiven. You should thank Zero."

Grimmjow staggered backwards a few paces. "Zero, take him to Aporro. He should probably look you over as well," Gin said.

"Hai," she said as she sheathed her sword and bowed. She looked at Grimmjow who was glaring at her. She moved and picked up the severed arm, slung it over her shoulder and headed for the door. Realizing it was either leave with her or face more of Aizen's wrath, he followed.

* * *

><p>The next evening Toshiro stood on the river embankment looking out at the water. The sun was setting. He frowned as he remembered the communication with the Soutaicho earlier that day.<p>

"_So we were right to consider her a traitor to Soul Society," the old man stated._

"_No!" Toshiro said, "It's not her fault what they did to her! She helped us! If my call was answered sooner, none of this would have happened. I asked for the limiters to be removed or backup to be sent!"_

"_Enough!" he said as he slammed his staff down. Although it was only in front of the screen, the effect was the same. Toshiro backed down. "She may have killed those Arrancar but she also took out several of our squad members that were sent for back up. That will not be overlooked nor will it be forgiven! You are to continue to patrol Karakura with your limiters released. If you should encounter her again, you are ordered to take her out by any means necessary!"_

He closed his eyes. Rukia was an enemy to Soul Society now. They wouldn't help her. He picked up a rock and threw it into the river. He picked up another and did the same. Over and over again, he threw them into the river, trying to let go of this mounting rage he felt burning inside; anger at Aizen, anger at himself.

"I used to do that a lot after my mother died." Toshiro stopped throwing but didn't turn around. "I thought if I could throw one hard enough or fast enough it would make the pain go away. But it didn't."

"What does?"

"Nothing."

"Ahh. So be it then," Toshiro said as he sat down.

"We'll get her back," Ichigo said as he sat down next to him.

"Then what?" Toshiro asked bitterly. "They've already changed her and we can't change her back. She'll never be the same. She'll never be a Shinigami again. What do you think Soul Society is going to do? Do you think they'll welcome her back with open arms? They'll put her in prison or let Kurotsuchi pick her apart. Maybe they'll be kind and just execute her."

Ichigo was silent for a while. He hadn't thought about what would happen once they had her back. If she were turned against them, they would turn her back. If Soul Society wouldn't accept her, then she would stay in the living world. It seemed simple to him.

"And what about you? Are you ready to just abandon her again?"

Toshiro remained silent.

* * *

><p>Days later Rukia sat in her cell, knees drawn up to her chest, eyes open. Granz had spent most of his time with Grimmjow trying to figure out how to recreate his lost limb with little success and had forgotten about Rukia. She couldn't remember when her last treatment was. She thought it was before her last mission as he barely looked at her when she brought Grimmjow in. Her mind wasn't as foggy as it usually was right after the shot but her head ached constantly.<p>

She had not seen Ichimaru-sama or Aizen-sama since their report. She had heard Granz mumble they were working on a project together based on his work. He was upset because he was not allowed to participate although he inspired the idea. That was before throwing Grimmjow's arm to the ground in frustration and giving her the sleep command.

All she could do was wait for one of them to come get her after that.

Although her head hurt, her mind wasn't clouded so she allowed her thoughts to roam. It would be a matter of time before she received another treatment and she would forget again. It was times like this she found herself curious. She dangerously thought about what _Rukia_ might have been like, who she was. She knew Aizen-sama would not be happy if he knew.

Still…

Images of the town they called Karakura flashed in her mind along with her first mission. Ulquiorra had told her to take out the Arrancar but leave the humans and Shinigami in the small area alone. The tall orange haired man confused her. He was hollow, she knew because she felt it. _It_ was somehow trapped inside. He smelled human and Shinigami. Aizen-sama was supposed to have control over all hollows. Did he have control over this one? Did the orange haired man? The hollow she smelled was strong. Stronger than anything she had seen before. She wondered what it looked like, how it would fight. The Shinigami side of him couldn't stand up to Grimmjow. She wondered why he didn't let the hollow out. _It_ could have taken out Grimmjow easily, even in his release mode.

She shook her head. She mustn't think about things like that. Aizen-sama would not like it.

She blinked.

Her thoughts turned elsewhere, to the smaller white haired man; the one who called her _Rukia._ He was only a Shinigami, like Aizen-sama. Could it be he knew her from _before?_ He was smaller than the others yet exerted an air of authority. She sensed he was strong. He could be stronger should Aizen-sama decide to use him.

She sighed as the pain in her head intensified. She shifted carefully as to not make it worse.

Her cell opened and Ulquiorra entered. He saw that she was sitting on her bed, back to the wall, knees drawn to her chest. Her jacket lay at the foot. He could see her hollow bone as it trailed from her fingers to her shoulder. Finger like tendrils with sharp points of bone spread out from her shoulder towards the hole in her chest. They fell a bit short to where if she were wearing the jacket, they were undetected. Five points stretched across her skin. One lay on her collarbone, three more spread inches apart with the last "finger" lying near her armpit. One tendril lay across her shoulder and reached towards her back. Like a six fingered demon holding onto her shoulder.

This was the first time he had seen her without her kimono or jacket. He looked her over and frowned. "You are in pain," he said factually. Rukia studied him. She knew Aizen-sama relied on him to carry out "jobs". She wasn't surprised that her first mission was with him. He was loyal and dependable. This was, however, the first time he had been to her room.

"It is nothing," she replied. He stood there, thinking about what Aizen said; about the commands he had been given. Rukia grew impatient as the seconds grew into minutes but remained in place and said nothing.

Ulquiorra knew the many operations to her brain had left her speech patterns something to be desired. While most of her thoughts remained whole, she lost the ability to articulate which frustrated her further making her choose to speak only when necessary. He liked her quietness over the incessant ramblings of Yammi or Grimmjow.

"Lord Aizen has something to show us before our next mission." Rukia looked at him and nodded slightly in comprehension.

"Mission?" she asked.

"We are to capture a Shinigami." The white haired man Rukia had seen on her last mission flashed through her mind. Would Aizen want him? "She is to be passing through the Dangai soon according to our Intel."

Rukia looked at him and nodded slightly again. Not the white haired man.

Rukia unfolded her legs and stood, her hand automatically resting on the hilt of her sword. She grabbed her jacket as Ulquiorra led her out of her cell and towards another room, several hallways away. He opened the door. Several other Espada were already there standing in a semicircle. Aizen was in the center along with something else.

She entered the room and stayed next to Ulquiorra. She met Grimmjow's glare with a blank one of her own.

"Ah, you made it," Aizen said. Rukia broke the gaze and gave him her full attention. "Zero, Ulquiorra. We were just finishing up." He moved slightly so that Rukia could see.

In the center of the room was a body bound by bandages. It was suspended on its knees in a box made of green light. Aizen held up the Hogyoku, looked at Rukia and smiled.

"What we accomplished with you, Zero was only the beginning." He pushed the rock into the barrier. It cracked then burst apart. Aizen turned his attention to the one in the center. "Would you tell us your name, new comrade?"

Rukia watched as it lifted its head. It had a small child-like body with blond hair. His hollow mask looked like a crown on the top of his head. He opened his bright violet eyes and looked around.

"Wonderweiss. Wonderweiss Margela," he said as he stood.

Aizen turned to Ulquiorra, "Do you remember the directive we talked about? I want you to proceed after today's mission."

"Yes, Sir," He replied.

Rukia was staring at the child-like man who had just stood. _Wonderweiss._ It had said. It smelled different than the others. Stronger, yet there was something not quite right. Her mind broke into a thousand thoughts at once. Intense pain shot through her head. She stood still and focused on the floor, concentrating on nothing.

Aizen took a step and touched her under her chin. He lifted her head so their eyes met. All thoughts ceased as her mind became calm. He smiled at her.

"What we've achieved with you, Zero we turned around and put to use. Memories tie and bond people together. Without them, there is nothing to hold them in place. No reason to keep them. Bonds can make one weak." He inclined his head towards the child, "He will have no bonds, no thoughts. Everything has been diverted to increase his strength." He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "Now go, complete your next assignment, Zero."

Rukia bowed and left with Ulquiorra.

* * *

><p>"Why?" Toshiro asked as he tried to hide the frustration in his voice. He was in the make shift communications room. Inoue and Matsumoto were in the kitchen cooking something non-edible. Unohana and Isane were on the screen.<p>

"Because we feel that a small visit would be good for her. She's been asking about you and wanting to see you. A change of pace in the living world will do her so much better than a day in my clinic."

"We're in the middle of a mission! This isn't the time for a vacation!" He complained.

"Hinamori is still a Fukutaicho."

Toshiro pinched the bridge of his nose and buried his frustration. "When?"

"She'll be there within the hour." Unohana said as she signed off. The screen went dark as did Toshiro's mood. Kurosaki was off training somewhere, Abarai and the human, Chad were training together, Ikkaku and Yumichika were supposed to be patrolling, but Toshiro knew they were goofing off at the mall.

He felt a slight pounding behind his eyes. Great. He threw open the door.

"Matsumoto!" he bellowed.

"Yes, sir?" she asked. Her head popped out the kitchen. She was in her gigai wearing a white button down blouse and jeans. She wore a frilly pink apron over it.

"They're sending Hinamori. I'm going for a walk," he said as he left the apartment.

"Is he ok?" Inoue asked concern in her voice.

Matsumoto forced a smile to her face, "He will be."

"I'm sure he will be as soon as we get Kuchiki-san back."

"Orihime…"

"Oh! It's ok! I can tell these things," Inoue said as she smiled. "When we get Kuchiki-san back, I can heal her and they'll be happy again."

"They'll? "

"No. It-it's ok. I know Kurosaki-kun loves her. It's part of the reason why he's gone off to get stronger somewhere. And Abarai-kun and Ishida-kun, they all love her. She's pretty great so I know your Taicho is in love with her too." Tears flooded her grey eyes. "K-Kuchiki-san…(sniff)…Kuchiki-san is my friend and I want her back too."

Matsumoto gave her a sad smile before closing the distance between them and enclosing the smaller girl in an embrace.

* * *

><p>Toshiro sat at the coordinates they gave him and waited for the gate to open. He was in a secluded area on the riverbank. He leaned against the guardrail and resisted the urge to sigh. He still couldn't believe they were sending her. Now. But then, maybe they did it for a reason. Their way of reminding him that they are in control and their rules will be followed.<p>

Rukia.

He closed his eyes.

"_That is not my name."_

His hand curled into fists. He felt…helpless. He hated that feeling more than anything. One of the reasons he wished to be strong was so he could make a difference, he could fix things, and he could react. Yet when the time came he didn't do any of those things. He did nothing.

"_So, what's the plan?" Matsumoto asked the day after Rukia was taken._

"_What are you talking about?"_

"_The plan...you know, to go get Rukia-chan."_

_Toshiro looked at her and frowned. "It is forbidden." He set his brush down and stood. "I'm going for a walk."_

_Toshiro walked around aimlessly for a while, lost in thought. He was surprised to find himself at the Kuchiki manor. As he realized where he was and turned to leave, Byakuya walked around the corner and spotted him._

"_What are you doing here?" he asked in his stoic voice._

_Toshiro wasn't sure how to answer without appearing stupid. But then, he supposed after everything that happened he was looking pretty stupid to everyone anyway._

"_I don't know." _

"_I would suggest you start to prepare for the impending war. Rukia would have wanted that."_

"_So that's it?" _

_Byakuya looked at him. "If you are implying that there will be some sort of rescue mission for her, then I can assure you there will not be one. The Soutaicho is the leader we have sworn allegiance to as we took our position and rank. I trust that you will not forget that."_

"_But Rukia – "_

"_When the time comes we will act but not in defiance."_

_Toshiro gave a small nod before heading back to his own division._

He shook his head and looked at his watch when he noticed the sun had started to set. Momo was three hours late.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Here we start to get into commands… Fukusuru means to yield or to submit. Shitagau means to accompany. You'll see why the commands are important later and how it all works…**

* * *

><p>Chapter 5<p>

Ulquiorra was slightly impressed at how easy the last assignment went. They approached the Shinigami in the Dangai and told her Aizen-sama wanted to see her. She went very willingly although she kept looking at Zero. Even after they presented her to Lord Aizen, she was looking at her, almost glaring at Zero. No, he didn't care for that. Nor did he care for the fact this Shinigami was a new addition to a plan he knew nothing about. He would request an audience later.

What surprised him the most was that they were both dismissed without a glance almost as soon as they entered the room. This was the first time Lord Aizen had not acknowledged Zero in some way. His eyes were on the Shinigami the entire time. Once they were dismissed, Ulquiorra noticed Zero hesitate. She never hesitates.

He closed the door to the throne room leaving the Shinigami with Lord Aizen. Zero was in front of him looking at the floor. He looked her over. Her eyes shifted.

"When was your last treatment?" He watched as her eyes remained focused on the floor. He moved in front of her, forcing her to look at him. He waited until she reluctantly met her eyes with his. They were full of pain.

"Don't remember," she whispered.

"Come, I will take you to Granz," he said as he turned towards the hall.

Rukia remained where she was. Ulquiorra stared at her. Since the string of operations ended, she had never defied any order given. The obey command immediately came to mind but fell silent on his tongue. He was curious.

"I was…" She started. She looked away, not sure how to continue. Her head was in pain, but her mind was filled with so many stray thoughts she didn't know what to do with them. She wasn't used to this many. Normally her mind was cloudy, only commands filtered through and she performed them. When her thoughts became chaotic, Aizen would calm them, she would receive a treatment and all would be well. "Thinking," she whispered.

"I didn't think they let you," Ulquiorra said.

"They don't," She glanced at the door to the throne room. "That Shinigami is not strong."

"Most are not."

"Trash?" she asked.

"Yes. They will never be able to fully understand us."

"She has importance," she said as her eyes remained on the door.

"Oooh, what are you doing out and about?" came a voice from around the corner. Ulquiorra turned his head in time to see Nnoitora come around. He was eying Rukia like a starving dog to a steak. She looked at him blankly. "Does Lord Aizen know you're on the loose?"

Rukia narrowed her eyes but said nothing.

"She sure is the quiet type," he said to Ulquiorra as he gave him a nudge with his elbow. "I like the quiet type. At least until I make them scream."

"Zero is returning to her room."

"Aww, that's too bad," he said as he licked his lips. He grinned showing what seemed to be all of his teeth. He leaned towards Zero, "that's really too bad." He laughed as he continued down the hallway. Ulquiorra watched him through narrowed eyes resisting the urge to rip out his throat though those annoying teeth.

Rukia held her head as a wave of intense pain crashed her senses. Ulquiorra turned his attention back to her and frowned.

"Zero, fukusuru!" Rukia looked at him, still holding her head. Her eyes glazed over. "Shitagau." He commanded and led her down the hallways towards the lab.

"Fix her, she is in pain." Ulquiorra stated as they entered Aporro's lab. Granz frowned.

"You don't get to come in here and make – "

"Lord Aizen will disagree with you."

"At this point I don't – " Again Granz's words were interrupted by a thud. They both turned to find Rukia passed out on the floor.

* * *

><p>"What do you mean, 'she's gone'?" Toshiro asked. He balled his hands into fists and scowled as he stared at the big screen. Soutaicho-Yamamoto stood with his eyes closed. Isane was next to him along with someone from the 12th.<p>

"We sent her though the senkaimon four hours ago," Isane offered. "When you reported she didn't arrive it was discovered a Garganta had opened in the Dangai."

"Is that even possible?" Toshiro asked, surprised.

"Apparently so." Yamamoto stated. "Kuchiki's reiatsu was detected along with another. They are responsible for the kidnapping of fukutaicho-Hinamori!"

Toshiro frowned. "Now what? Are you going to declare her a traitor as well?"

"All travel between worlds has been shut down. I will not let Aizen take his pick of our own to do with as he pleases. Central 46 is deciding now if there is to be a rescue party. You will await further orders."

The screen went dark.

Toshiro blinked. So they're considering a rescue mission for Hinamori yet refused the idea when Kuchiki was taken? He shook his head. Sure, Momo was a higher rank while Rukia wasn't seated, but still… He needed to talk to Urahara.

* * *

><p>Granz scrambled to find the syringe he needed. Ulquiorra picked Rukia up off the floor. He was amazed at how small she really was. He placed her on the gurney type bed in the room and rolled her onto her side. He moved her hair, exposing the back of her neck. He absently traced the "0" with his finger as he waited for Granz to prepare her shot.<p>

If he had not seen how powerful she was with his own eyes he never would have believed the number on her neck. Surely one so small could not take down the likes of himself, yet…Some of the things he had seen her do during training made him think otherwise.

"How long before she recovers?"

"It'll be almost instantaneous." He watched as Granz gave her the shot and waited.

And waited.

Ulquiorra looked at the pink haired man and frowned. "I believe Lord Aizen should be informed – "

"No! No, it'll be ok. She'll be fine, just give it a few more minutes."

Ulquiorra was about to leave when he saw her eyes open. Rukia sat up straight, placed her hands in her lap and looked at the floor.

"Are you better?"

"Hai," she replied her voice flat. Ulquiorra looked at Granz who shrugged his shoulders.

"Come, I will take you back to your room. You will rest before our next mission." Ulquiorra left the lab with Rukia trailing behind. He opened the door to her cell when they reached it and watched as Rukia sat on her bed, drawing her knees to her chest.

"Our mission tomorrow will be in the living world. Lord Aizen wishes to have a certain human."

"The human-hollow?" Rukia asked as her mind vaguely remembered the male with orange hair.

"No, but we might encounter him."

"We are to fight?"

"Only if necessary; retrieving the human is the mission."

Rukia sat back and closed her eyes. "Hai," she whispered. She waited for the cloud to descend and take her thoughts. Her head still hurt.

Ulquiorra watched from the door for a few moments before turning to leave.

"Ulquiorra?"

He stopped and turned. Her eyes were still closed. "Yes?"

"I am trash?"

His eyes widened at the question. It wasn't a secret that he considered almost everything beneath him. He had called Shinigami 'trash' many times although he wasn't sure if he had done so in her presence.

"No, Zero. You are not."

* * *

><p>Rukia opened her eyes many hours later. She had finished resting and was annoyed to find her head still hurt. Perhaps she needed another treatment. She blinked as she looked at her window.<p>

The view never changed. The same starless night with the same crescent moon was there every time she looked. She heard footsteps coming towards her room, the key as it slid into the lock. She tilted her head slightly as she waited for the door to open.

"You're awake," he said in a higher pitched voice than normal. Rukia narrowed her eyes. "I thought I had given you a big enough dose to keep you out for a while." He adjusted his glasses and ran his hand through his pink hair. He took a step forward and produced a syringe from his pocket. "No matter, I brought a back up."

"What are you doing?" She asked as he plunged the needle into her arm.

"Shhh," he said as he placed a knee on her bed and tossed the empty needle aside. "This will be our little secret."

Rukia watched as his hand touched the side of her face. She felt her skin crawl under his touch as her mind flashed to another time.

"_I want her ready by the end of the week," Aizen stated as he turned to walk out of the lab. _

"_I really wanted more time with her…"_

"_The end of the week or else. She is a vital piece to my plan and nothing is going to get in the way of that. She will be above all others, including you."_

"_Yes, Lord Aizen," Granz said between his clenched teeth. He turned to the pile of flesh strapped down and lying on his exam table and scoffed. She would be nothing without him. HE was the one who came up with the idea, HE was the one who performed the procedures. All Aizen did was fuse her with that rock creating another useless Arrancar. _

_Useless. Yes._

"_You would be nothing without me, do you understand, Zero?" He walked over to her and turned her head so he could look into her blank, violet eyes. "Do you know why he calls you Zero? It's not because you are the most powerful, it's because you are nothing. NOTHING!" His fingers dug deep into her face as his anger rose. "You are nothing without me." He whispered. "You are my creation, mine!" His other hand moved the thin blanket that was covering her naked body. He exposed her chest and smiled. "You will always be mine, Zero."_

Rukia's conscious slammed back to the present as she felt his tongue slide down the side of her neck. She felt lightheaded and her limbs felt a thousand times their weight. He drugged her. At that realization, her instinct kicked in. She gathered and concentrated her reiatsu into her right hand. It started to glow red as she formed a Bala. With what strength she had she was able to land a punch to his shoulder sending him out of her room and across the hall.

She heard the satisfying crunch as his shoulder shattered on impact. She tried to move again, get to her feet. As the drug took over, Rukia rolled off the bed onto the floor. She heard him groan as he moved to stand. She tried to keep her eyes open, fought against the heaviness of her lids and lost as the darkness overtook her.

* * *

><p>"Let me get this straight. Kuchiki-san was kidnapped and turned into an Arrancar. It was forbidden to go after her. Aizen strikes again and takes Hinamori-san. Soul Society is currently deciding her fate and you want to bypass waiting and just go to Hueco Mundo on your own?" Urahara said as he reached for his cup of tea. He and Toshiro were in the back room of his shop. A table was between them. On it sat a small tea pot and two cups.<p>

Toshiro looked at him. "I can't just sit here while Aizen destroys someone else I care about!" He said. Urahara straightened his back.

"Aizen is creating an army. All of which are there. Do you really think you will be able to do anything by yourself? You have a remarkable Bankai, but against all of them?" He set his cup back down on the table. "What if you run into Kuchiki-san?"

Toshiro felt his spine tingle as he scowled.

"From what Kurosaki-kun has told me, Aizen turned her into something quite formidable. Are you going to fight her? Kill her?"

"No…I-"

"Then she will kill you. This is something Aizen has planned from the moment he took her. There was a reason for turning Kuchiki-san. She has close ties to three taicho's, a fukutaicho and an extraordinary Shinigami-daiko. She is the perfect tool to use to divide Soul Society."

"We've been ordered to…"

"Kill her, I know."

Toshiro fisted his hands as he closed his eyes. He still couldn't believe everything that was happening. The Soutaicho refused to hear anything in her defense. She had already been written off. He shook his head.

"And Hinamori? Why would he want her?"

"I think he wants something different from her. While she is a Fukutaicho, her connections are substantially smaller. However, she would be useful to Aizen in other ways."

"How?"

"I do not know. Not for certain anyway. She has been nothing but loyal to him, even now."

"What do you suggest I do then? I can't just sit around…Arraah!" he yelled as he slammed his fist against the table. Urahara lifted his head so that his eyes were visible beneath his hat and met Toshiro's gaze.

"I would strongly suggest waiting until you hear word from Soul Society. You never know, they might want Hinamori-fukutaicho back and will mount a rescue of their own. However, if they do not and if you are that determined to save Hinamori then I will open the gate for you. I must warn you. It will take me a few days to bypass Aizen's control over the area."

"Fine," Toshiro said. Urahara lowered his head in a bow. He stood and paused at the door. "Tell Abarai that I'm taking his shift tonight since he's helping the human train."

Toshiro walked outside and looked at the moon. His thoughts were conflicted and he was frustrated not being able to do anything about it. He didn't feel any better after talking to Urahara and realized it only made him want to invade Hueco Mundo even more. Hinamori, Kuchiki… He had to get them back.

* * *

><p>He sat and watched as she slept off the drug that was in her system. He had found her in the hallway passed out with Granz looking a little worse for wear by the wall. Her door had been broken. When he confronted the man, Lord Aizen picked that exact moment to summon him leaving Ulquiorra orders to take care of Zero and proceed with their mission. With her room no longer secure and not sure what else to do, he picked her up and brought her to his quarters and watched her.<p>

Rukia opened her eyes and sat up slowly. She was not in her room. She was on a bed, softer than her own. She pulled the covers off of her and swung her legs off the bed.

"You are awake. Are you unharmed?"

Rukia turned her head and met Ulquiorra's gaze. He was sitting in a chair, opposite side of the room, watching her. This was his room, her mind registered. She gave a small nod.

"Where is Granz?" She asked as her eyes grew dark.

"Aizen has him out on a mission. I went to retrieve you this morning and found the door to your room broken and you were passed out in the hallway."

"Why am I here?"

Ulquiorra blinked. He wasn't sure how he should answer that as he wasn't quite sure of the reason himself. He didn't trust the others around her. Nnoitora had a hidden agenda and Grimmjow wanted vengeance for his arm. It wasn't that he didn't think she could handle herself. He knew she could. It was more along the lines of she shouldn't have to. Not if he could prevent it. She had enough to deal with judging by what he had seen earlier. Granz was up to no good that was a fact that didn't sit well with him. He had drugged Zero. Why? What was he going to do with her?

The more he thought, the more agitated he became. Granz was beneath Zero. If it were not for her treatments, he shouldn't be touching her. He would request a conference with Lord Aizen.

Instead of answering her question he looked at her. She was still in pain. He frowned.

"I believe I will take another on the mission," he said. It was her turn to frown.

"Why?"

"We must be ready to fight if needed. The human we are after will be surrounded by Shinigami. You are still in pain."

In an instant, Rukia released her reiatsu and moved from the bed in a blur. She straddled Ulquiorra, pinning him to the chair. Her right hand was on his shoulder; her left was balled into a fist, ice shards protruding from the hollow bone poised at his neck. Their eyes locked.

"I am well enough to fight trash," she mocked. Ulquiorra gave a small smile.

"Fine."


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Thank you all for your kind reviews! I really appreciate them all! Thank you for reading!**

**As far as my hatred of Hinamori… ;) Kubo made her mentally weak and dependent on Aizen. I like to explore it and take it further. She's not one of my favorite characters, neither is Orihime. While they are strong in their own ways, to me, they are emotionally weak. It's not that I hate them – it's more like they have traits I like to exploit…**

* * *

><p>Chapter 6<p>

Toshiro sat on the couch in Inoue's apartment. He finished the patrol in Abarai's place and sent Ikkaku and Yumichika out to patrol the other side of town. Things were too quiet. He had a gut feeling that it was all about to change. That Aizen was about to make his first move and he didn't want to be caught off guard. Kurosaki was off training somewhere, Abarai was training with the male human and Matsumoto was shadowing the human girl at school.

His mind was in turmoil. Aizen took Kuchiki, he took Hinamori and there wasn't anything he could do. He thought about what Urahara had said. Kuchiki had ties to several people. Even with the order in place, would they be able to strike her down? After a bit of thinking he came to the conclusion they wouldn't. He couldn't imagine any of them striking her down. Even Byakuya would hesitate; but if she was up against someone like Kenpachi… He shook his head. Kurosaki would interfere. That he knew. He didn't risk his own life in order to save her from her execution only to have another kill her.

He felt a pang of jealousy at that thought. Indeed, Kurosaki would find a way to save her. He would have chased after her as soon as he knew she was gone.

He scowled.

His communicator crackled to life.

"Taicho! I need back up! They're here!" Matsumoto's voice yelled as his cell phone started beeping.

Toshiro clicked on his communicator. "Where?"

"We're at the school!"

Toshiro took off to the roof. It was late afternoon and the streets were crowded with people returning home for the day. Anger flowed through his veins. He hated Aizen, he hated Ichimaru, and he even hated Yamamoto at this point.

He was a block away from the school when he stopped. He felt the cold and her reiatsu at the same time. His pulse quickened.

"Rukia…"

He scanned the deserted school yard. Matsumoto was with Orihime helping her with an after school project. They were on their own when the Garganta opened in the gym.

Ulquiorra and Rukia stepped through. "I will see to the woman, you make sure the others do not interfere," he commanded.

Rukia spread her fingers out as the floor became slick with ice. Matsumoto and Orihime looked up from their poster project at the same time.

Matsumoto reached for her Zanpaktou and gasped as her arm froze as she touched it. Layers upon layers of ice formed, enclosing her hand to her sword, keeping them in place. She looked up and gasped again as she looked into Rukia's cold eyes.

"Kuchi-…AH!" She screamed as Rukia enclosed her in a cage of thick ice. Matsumoto tried to break it with her remaining hand but could not. She tried several times to crash into the ice but could not maintain footing on the slick floor beneath her. Panting, she watched as Rukia turned away. She lifted her hand, "Shakkaho!"

A red ball shot out of her hand, breaking the front of the cage. Rukia turned and pointed her finger at Matsumoto as she began to step through the bars of the cage. Yellow light shone from the tip of her finger before it branched out and turned into a crawling rope. It wound its way around Matsumoto, binding her non frozen arm to her side.

Rukia touched the side of the cage and the bars reformed. Satisfied she posed no further threat, Rukia walked towards Ulquiorra. She was met with an intensifying stab of pain that temporarily blinded her. Ulquiorra finished talking to Inoue and watched as Rukia fell to her knees clutching her head.

The door to the gym blew off its hinges. Ulquiorra narrowed his eyes. Frozen by fear, Inoue shrunk back to the wall. Toshiro entered the gym.

He surveyed the area. He gasped and his eyes narrowed as he saw Rukia on the floor, holding her head. Ulquiorra opened the Garganta, scooped up Inoue and made a move for Rukia.

"Don't you touch her!" Toshiro yelled out as he positioned himself between the two. His sword extended. "I will not let you hurt her anymore!"

"Fool, she will be dead if I do not take her back," Ulquiorra said. "She is already in pain."

"You've done enough!" He yelled as he lunged forward. His sword stopped by Ulquiorra's arm. As they came apart, Ulquiorra shifted the woman in his hands and looked at Rukia.

"Zero…"

Blinded by the pain in her head, Rukia tried to make her way to Ulquiorra. The more she moved, the more the pain increased. Fearing she was jeopardizing the mission she forced herself to her feet.

Toshiro watched her as she staggered a few paces. Her face was scrunched up, and deathly pale. Ulquiorra took another step closer to her.

"Soten Ni zase Hyorinmaru!" Toshiro yelled out and threw the dragon between them. "Drop the human!" He walked a few paces closer to Rukia trying to position himself between the two. Rukia fell to her knees as her hands clutched her head.

"Go!" she said as she managed to open her eyes. "She is the mission. You have her and will complete it!"

Renji and Urahara arrived. They stood next to Matsumoto, trying to assess the situation.

"Zero…" Ulquiorra said hesitating.

"Now!" Rukia ordered as she pointed her Zanpaktou in his direction. A huge wall made of snow and ice formed, sealing them off from each other. Ulquiorra turned to the open Garganta and went through holding Inoue as Rukia collapsed on the floor.

Toshiro rushed to Rukia's side. He hesitated, reluctant to touch her. He cringed as his fingers went over the bone on her left hand. She was cold and _felt_ like a hollow.

"Rukia?" he whispered.

"Rukia!" Renji called out as he knelt on her other side.

She opened her eyes and tried to focus; the pain was too bright, the hole in her head too deep. She saw the white haired man she had seen from her first mission; the one who called her by that other name.

"It's not…Rukia," she managed.

Toshiro's eyes grew as she instantly stilled. "Rukia? Rukia!" he yelled as his arms slipped behind her back and he gently lifted her to his lap. His eyes lingered on the hole above her breast as he wrestled with himself in his mind as he faced his fear. She was a hollow now.

The Rukia he knew was gone.

* * *

><p>"<em>Kuchiki, I have something I need to ask you." This was proving to be harder than he thought as he looked at her. He had walked her back to the Kuchiki mansion after one of their training sessions. The afternoon was bathed in reds and oranges as the sun continued its descent. <em>

"_Yes?" she asked as she gently prodded him. Her violet eyes shone with mischief as she had already guessed what it was he was going to ask. _

"_Kuchiki…" He started. This was hard enough but when he looked at her with e soft glow of light behind her…His mouth went dry and his brain froze. He ran his hand through his hair and took a deep breath. He decided it would be easier if he didn't look at her. At least maybe he would be able to ask her without looking like a complete idiot. "I would really…appreciate it…"_

"_Appreciate?"_

"_I would be indebted…"_

"_Ouch. That's worse than appreciate."_

"_You're making this difficult." He snapped. He met her gaze and watched as she laughed. He was getting frustrated. This was all wrong and he was on the verge of giving up._

"_Ok, ok. I'm sorry. You were saying, Taicho," she said as she held her hands up in a silent promise she would behave._

"_I want you to come with me tomorrow night to Matsumoto's birthday party," he said as he changed his stance and stood defiantly, daring her to say no, yet not looking at her either. _

_Rukia smiled. "Ok."_

"_Ok?"_

"_Ok," she assured. He opened his eyes and looked at her. She wasn't laughing at him although she had a small smile on her face. They reached the gate to the mansion. "I'll see you then," she said as she shunpo'd into the house._

"_Ok!" Toshiro said to no one as he felt exhilarated. He headed back to his office and was almost there when the realization hit._

_He had a date._

_The exhilaration turned to nervousness and it had not abated come the following night. His palms were sweaty as he told himself for the hundredth time that it was just Kuchiki he was taking. It was no big deal. They trained all the time now, he was beginning to know more about her and was…comfortable with her. She was his friend. Yes. Friend. _

_Then Matsumoto had to make a big deal out of her birthday and throw a party. She had to specify that guests were to bring dates. While he debated not going at all, he couldn't stop thinking about Kuchiki and decided to ask. He smiled as he reached the mansion. _

_Matsumoto modeled her party after the human world and insisted everyone come dressed "modern". She had transformed the 10__th__ Division into something called a "dance club". Toshiro almost regretted giving her free reign but the promise of restoring everything the following day and doing his share of the paperwork got him to reconsider. Hell, he would be happy if she did her share._

_The door opened before he could knock and he found himself staring into a pair of beautiful violet eyes. She had on a violet and black striped off the shoulder dress that fell to just above her knee. She had a black shear lace wrap with matching black sandals. Her cheeks were pink as she stared into his eyes._

"_You look good," she said blushing. Her eyes widened as she realized what she said. "I mean…you look…that is…."_

_He smirked as she started to fumble. He was dressed in a white button down shirt with a tie to match his eyes, jeans and a black sport jacket. _

"_You're cute when you're flustered."_

_Rukia was silent but gave him a sideways look. She wasn't sure if she should be complimented or insulted by that comment. He didn't give her time to be either as he led her towards his division and the party._

* * *

><p>Kisuke walked over and examined the small woman Toshiro was holding and frowned. He had never seen one like this before. Aizen had obviously perfected his technique over the others. He glanced at the wall she created and whistled. "Renji, take Matsumoto-san with you and patrol the area."<p>

Renji tore his eyes away from Rukia, still not believing what he was seeing. "Hai," he replied. He knew the Espada would be back. He struck the ice cage and freed Matsumoto. She looked at her Taicho and left with Renji. Urahara stared intently at Rukia, taking in the hole and the bone.

"Can you help her?" Toshiro whispered.

"I thought she was to be destroyed?" He replied in his mock teasing tone. "I could have sworn that an order of her demise was to be carried out on sight."

Their eyes met and held.

"I want you to be sure what you are asking. You are the Taicho of the 10th Division. Your duties – "

"Will be damned! Can you help her?" He ground out. His irritation quickly escalated as his fingers dug into her flesh. He watched as Kisuke crouched down and touched her chest, fingers lingering on the edge of the hole.

"I can't turn her back," he said. He indicated for Toshiro to lay her flat. As her head lolled to the side, he caught a glimpse of her neck and gasped. He pushed her head down further and lifted her hair. Toshiro's eyes widened.

"Zero," he whispered. "That's what the other one called her."

"I'm imagining they did more than just rename her," Kisuke said as his fingers traced jagged scars that ran through her hairline. He muttered a spell and she was encased in a green light. It lasted only a few moments before blinking out. With a sigh, Kisuke stood and looked at the wall she made once more. He was still trying to comprehend what it was he saw. How could such a thing be _allowed_ to happen? He sighed and lowered his head, hiding his eyes. "It would be better for you if you followed your orders and destroyed her."

Toshiro gasped. "What?" He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

Without turning from the wall, Kisuke continued, "Yamamoto gave you an order specifically regarding Kuchiki Rukia. I am telling you, without a doubt, she is no longer a Shinigami. She should be destroyed."

Toshiro was on his feet and by Kisuke's side in an instant. Anger and disbelief burned in his teal eyes. "I will not abandon her again!" Kisuke lifted his head slightly and stared intently at the short man.

"It's not about abandoning her. It's about putting her out of her misery."

"What are you talking about?"

"Look at her! That's not a Shinigami! That's not even an Arrancar! Not fully… I don't even know what it is, my spell was blocked. Aizen doesn't want us to know what he's done. He's not going to just let her go and neither will the Soutaicho. And what do you think is going to happen to those who help her? This isn't about neglecting your duty or skipping over a small order, Hitsugaya-kun. This is about defying the Central 46."

Toshiro felt the blood drain from his face. He's had similar thoughts.

"Is she worth it?"

Toshiro closed his eyes.

"I should also mention that not only do you have to watch your back for Soul Society and Aizen but you'll have to watch your front to make sure she's not trying to kill you with a power that is probably equal to or greater than your own."

Toshiro shook his head, there had to be a way. "Why?"

"Because that's what she's been programmed to do. Kill you, kill me, kill everyone in Aizen's path. This is more than just brainwashing like Hinamori. He physically reconstructed her brain."

"Re…con…struct…ed," Toshiro breathed out as his spine tingled. "He dug into her _brain_?" The realization of what she had to endure made him sick. He felt the strength in his legs vaporize as he stumbled back to her side.

"_Be happy, Toshiro."_ Her voice rang out in his head. He hadn't been happy since he made the decision to let her go. He turned around and looked at her on the floor. Everything he fought for in his life was on the line; his title, his power, everything. Was he willing to give it all up for her? Become banished by Soul Society or worse?

He watched as her body shook as her chest rose and fell. It was obvious she was in pain. Killing her would be the easiest route to take. The position he was in was familiar…Rukia or Momo. Although the steaks weren't as high before, he had chosen his childhood friend because of a promise he made; because she needed him, because she wanted him. He thought that was what he wanted too. He knew that it was expected. Everyone knew how much Momo meant to him so the choice was obvious. Rukia was the newcomer in his heart. Something so new it could easily be pushed aside and forgotten about.

Except he hadn't forgotten and he wasn't able to push his feelings aside. Her eyes, broken and filled with tears haunted him. The memories of their time together plagued his dreams filling him up with happiness he found he'd only known with her; only to wake up to the reality of what was…life without her.

He reached out, took her hand and entwined their fingers as they had done many times while taking walks after training. Her fingers were still small, yet with the hollow bone attached, they were bulkier. Her skin was smooth and cold, like marble.

He looked at her face, just as smooth, just as flawless as he remembered, although she was noticeably paler. With his other hand he tentatively touched her cheek. Her stubborn bang fell to the side. He gently pushed it back.

"Hitsugaya-kun?" Urahara asked softly.

Matsumoto ran back inside the gym, jumping over the crumpled door Toshiro had destroyed earlier, "There's a Garganta opening in the school yard!"

Toshiro carefully picked Rukia up and carried her to the doorway. He looked out into the yard and saw several Arrancar step through. He turned back to Kisuke as his eyebrows drew together in determination.

"Help her."

Kisuke nodded.

"Then there is only one place we can take her if we have any shot at all in saving her."

"Where?"

"There's a warehouse on the other side of town by the old station."

Toshiro nodded and spoke into his communicator. "Everyone, I want you to keep as many of these guys occupied as long as you can."

"There are a lot of them," Ikkaku said over the speaker.

"They don't seem to be interested in us at all," Yumichika said.

"I would imagine they're not. They're looking to get Rukia back and I will not let that happen. Keep them away from the old train station. I want that entire section cleared and blocked. Is that understood?"

"Taicho!" Matsumoto called from outside. Renji was already engaged with several Arrancar. Toshiro tightened his grip on Rukia as he flashed stepped to the roof.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: Thank you all for your reviews, alerts and time!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 7<p>

Toshiro and Kisuke arrived without incident to the old part of town. Old crumbled buildings with broken windows stood quietly in the dark.

Kisuke stood in front of an alley and squinted. "I'm not as good at detecting these things as I used to be." He noticed how his breath made smoke in the sudden cold air. He looked at Rukia. "I think we're going to have a problem if we don't get inside."

"Huh?" Toshiro followed the other man's gaze and looked at the woman in his arms. Her cold reiatsu was spreading out. She would be conscious soon.

"Ah! Here we are!" he said as he walked across the street. Toshiro looked at the vacant lot and looked puzzled. Kisuke took a step and disappeared. Toshiro blinked.

"It's shielded."

"She won't be able to pass through. Wait here for a minute." He looked at Rukia again. "Don't let her go." With that he completely disappeared.

Toshiro looked at Rukia; her breathing was calmer than before. Her eyes were still closed. A small layer of ice started to form around her body. It encased Toshiro as well. If he wielded any other element he wouldn't have been able to hold on to her.

"What have we here?" Toshiro raised his head and found he was looking at a brown eyed man with chin length blond hair and big teeth. He looked familiar. "Interesting, indeed," he said as he looked at Rukia. "Hachi, modify the shielding to let one of _them_ in."

Toshiro saw a brief flicker of a warehouse building where the lot stood before it disappeared again. "Come on, before she wakes up."

Toshiro entered the warehouse and looked around. It was empty. He looked in the corner and saw Kisuke and the other man at a ladder that led underground.

"My! I wonder where this goes?" Kisuke said. The other man rolled his eyes before heading down. Toshiro shifted Rukia over his shoulder so he could climb down.

The warehouse "basement" turned into a cavern much like the one under Kisuke's own shop. He opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by a moan.

"What is THAT doing here?" A short girl with pigtails and a nasty attitude said as she came barreling into the blond man. "What are you doing bringing more here?"

"Ow! You don't understand…"

"Isn't that one enough?" she demanded as she pointed in the direction she came from. Toshiro glanced over and saw Ichigo surrounded by people who were oddly familiar. Then it hit him.

"Hirako Shinji…" he said. The blond looked at him and smiled.

"Hitsugaya Toshiro. I was before your time, but it's nice to be remembered," he extended his hand but was knocked back down by the girl in pigtails.

"Hiyori…" The girl whirled around and stared Toshiro down.

"Now you listen! I – " She gasped, cutting herself off. The sandy ground turned to ice.

"Shinji!" Kisuke said urgently.

"Hachi! I need a box and I need it now!"

"Hai!" The big man said as he slapped his hands together. "Do you want to be in the box with her when she wakes up?" Toshiro looked at the large man then laid Rukia down on the ground and stepped back. The barrier went up.

"Rukia!" Toshiro turned to see Ichigo running towards them. "How?" He reached the barrier as her eyes opened. He was panting, out of breath and looked pretty worse for wear. In fact, they all did.

Everyone seemed to be holding their breath. Inside the box Rukia opened her eyes. The pain was still there, still blinding and only slightly better after her rest. She had to get back to Lord Aizen, he could fix what Granz screwed up. She slowly stood, her hands still attached to her head. She felt like she had to hold it or it would fall off. She extended her left arm and tapped the air. Nothing happened.

She tried to focus and blinked several times. That's when she saw them. The white haired man from earlier, the human/hollow man and several others she had not seen before. Fury burned in her eyes. She had been captured.

She spread her arms out and found she could not fully extend them without touching the sides of a barrier. It sent a shock of electricity though her as she came in contact with it. She quickly withdrew her hands.

"Rukia!" Ichigo called out.

"Release me," she demanded.

"I'm afraid we can't do that," Toshiro said as he stepped forward. Rukia looked at him and narrowed her eyes.

"Then kill me."

Toshiro looked into her eyes, searching for anything that was Rukia; searching for any reason not to do what she asked. Kisuke's words hung heavily in his mind.

Her eyes were still the same violet orbs he knew, but they were cold, distant and blank.

_Reconstructed_.

He had a thousand reasons to kill her and not one to keep her alive, yet…

Yet…

"Rukia…" he whispered. She looked at him. A flash of puzzlement danced across her face before it hardened.

"Zero," she corrected.

"Kuchiki Rukia was your name before Aizen took you from us." Her eyes widened before narrowing.

"Lord Aizen saved me. Before does not matter."

"Is that what he told you?"

Rukia was agitated; the pain in her head was intense. It hurt to move, to talk, to think… This man…he was talking about _before_. She shook her head. She tried not to think about _before_. It always intensified the pain. It didn't matter anyway, it wasn't who she was. She remembered standing in the hall with Ichimaru. He had called her Rukia once.

"I was Shinigami," she whispered.

Toshiro was excited, "Yes! You…" he almost choked, "were Shinigami."

"Trash," she snarled as she repeated Ulquiorra's words. "All Shinigami are trash and are to be destroyed!" She placed her hands on the barrier, ignoring the shocks being sent through her body. She marveled at how it gave her something to concentrate on other than the pain in her head. Snow flowed out from her fingers and covered the front wall of the barrier. Cold blue reiatsu swirled powerfully around her, pushing on the walls of the box.

"Everyone get ready," Shinji commanded as he saw the sides of the box expand. Swords drawn everyone gathered and surrounded Rukia. They shielded their faces as the barrier finally gave way and they were assaulted by the blast of cold reiatsu.

She stood in the center her face blank. As the reiatsu died down she immediately noticed something was…off. She looked at Shinji and tilted her head. "Hollow…" she whispered. She slowly looked at the faces surrounding her and became more confused. She reached for her Zanpaktou and noticed it was not there.

Kisuke guessed her dilemma and took a careful step forward. "Aizen had a hand in creating these people as well." He glanced at Shinji who cleared his throat.

"Yes, well… " He said as he realized he had her attention. "We are visored; part Shinigami part hollow, like you."

"Not like me."

Shinji became interested as was Kisuke. "Aizen experimented with us. Tried to fuse us with a hollow and left us to die. We overcame the demon inside," his gaze followed hers as he saw she was looking at Ichigo. "Like he is doing now, Kurosaki Ichigo."

"Ichi…go," Rukia said as she turned to him.

"Ichigo recently overcame his hollow. Now he's able to use its power but not fully become one."

Rukia snapped her head back towards Shinji and stepped forward. Everyone stood ready, if she was aware, she didn't show it.

"Not like me. You are Shinigami and weak," she said as she squeezed her eyes closed. The pain was intense.

"I am not weak!" a voice said from the back. Hiyori lunged at Rukia.

"Hiyori freeze!" Shinji cried out.

Not listening, she pulled her hollow mask on and charged. Rukia turned and waited until the girl was close enough. She grabbed the sword with her hand, stopping all motion and stared into Hiyori's hollowed eyes with slight interest. Hiyori froze. No one had ever stopped her sword like that. Rukia reached out and grabbed her by her throat, not hurting the girl, just enough to hold her still.

Seconds dragged like minutes as Rukia and Hiyori were locked in each other's gaze.

"I am not limited like you."

"Limited?" Shinji asked. She gently shook her head; still looking at Hiyori's hollowed eyes.

"Only one at a time in control. You use power that is not your own."

"How do you…"

"Aizen-sama created you," Rukia blinked and pushed, sending Hiyori backwards. She landed on her butt, her mask dissolved. Love went to her side to make sure she was ok.

Hachi erected another set of barriers around Rukia who didn't seem to notice. Her hands went to her head as her features distorted. She fell to her knees but didn't cry out.

"Rukia!" Ichigo called out as he stepped closer to the barrier.

"What happened? Why is she in pain?" Toshiro asked. He watched as she pulled her knees to her chest, trying to find her comfort position.

"Immense pain," Kisuke said. "Something went wrong with the transformation, didn't it?" he asked her as he sheathed his sword. The others looked at him. "Aizen took you and used the Hogyoku to transform you into an Arrancar, but something happened. Instead of becoming a full hollow you fused with it along with your Zanpaktou spirit. You have the features of a hollow and when they stripped your mind you have the instincts of a hollow, just what he wanted. They must have tried a memory block first. When that didn't work he tried his Zanpaktou. I am guessing that didn't work either. That's the only reason I can come up with for why they did what they did, cut into your brain and physically alter your mind."

Toshiro shuddered. Ichigo frowned. The others gasped.

"How do you know?" Ichigo asked.

"I tried to scan her, but was blocked. I did get a glimpse though. I'm assuming the reasons behind the actions, but the part that serves memory has been severely altered, some of it has been removed. Also other areas have been altered. To compensate, it is continuously trying to heal itself, reestablish new connections, fix the ones severed. That's why she is in so much pain. The easiest solution would be to leave the Hogyoku in her, but Aizen has other plans for it. So they're doing something else to force her to stop making connections, leaving her at her instincts and without pain."

Toshiro recalled what the other Espada said to him before he left. "She'll be dead if he didn't take her back."

"Aizen is brilliant. He has the most powerful being in his arsenal and no worries if she falls into the wrong hands. Without whatever it is they give her, she'll die."

"That is sick!" Shinji said as he recovered.

"What can we do to help her?" Ichigo said. The others looked at him.

"Hitsugaya-kun?" Kisuke asked. "I only remind you of our earlier conversation. How far do you want to go?"

"What conversation?" Ichigo asked.

"As soon as Soul Society finds out exactly what Aizen has done to her, they will either destroy her or try to use her for themselves. To simply hide her from them is a risk."

"What are you talking about?" Hiyori asked.

Toshiro cleared his throat and addressed the crowd. "I was assigned to Karakura to investigate the new hollow Aizen has created. I'm also here to take out as many as I can before the war," he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "That includes Kuchiki."

"No!" Ichigo yelled. "I will NOT let you hurt her!"

"She is an enemy of Soul Society and the order has been given to destroy her." Toshiro said.

"Pfft, there they go again, thinking they know everything," Hiyori said as she joined Shinji's side.

"I don't care about their orders," Ichigo said as he positioned himself in front of the shorter man.

"If Soul Society doesn't kill her, Aizen will and neither of them will give up looking for her until that happens. Everyone, EVERYONE who helps her might as well be considered a traitor to Soul Society."

"That's no different than how it is now," Lisa said softly.

"But they've stopped looking for you," Toshiro said. "There's a risk in keeping her, hiding her, trying to get her back into some form of the Rukia we knew. That might not even be possible."

"And you…" Kisuke said, "You will be risking your position."

"Inconsequential," Toshiro whispered. "I'm going to help her, but I can't do it alone."

"I won't speak for the group. If anyone says no, we're out of it." Shinji said.

"I think we know better than anyone how Soul Society treats Aizen's experiments. I'm in," Lisa said. Around the room everyone nodded. Shinji looked at Hiyori, thinking back to their altercation. She looked at him and feigned indifference.

"Sure," she said. Shinji grinned.

"There's more," Toshiro said. He looked at Ichigo. "The whole reason we have her is because of why they were here. Kurosaki…The other one was able to take Inoue with him."

Ichigo's eyes grew. "What?"

"Matsumoto and Inoue were in the gym when Rukia and another attacked. By the time I got there, I was able to separate them, but Rukia blocked my way of getting to Inoue. I'm sorry."

Ichigo was shocked and stunned, not entirely sure what to say. His fist clenched and unclenched. His eyes narrowed as he turned to Urahara.

"How long until you can get a gate ready?"

"Assuming your human friends are going with you, I will need at least a week to accommodate their makeup and to get around Aizen's blocks."

Ichigo looked at Rukia and frowned. "How long would it take for Aizen to turn Inoue into…" He couldn't say it.

"He's not going to turn her. Her abilities are what he's after more than likely." Kisuke offered.

"How do you know?"

"Because that's what I would be after."

Rukia was curled up, her head resting on her knees silently watching the exchange. Ichigo balled his hands into fists. "I can't wait a week."

"You just overcame your hollow. You can't maintain more than a few seconds with your mask. You need more training," Shinji said.

Ichigo paced back and forth, restless. He wanted more than anything at that point to go to Hueco Mundo and bring Inoue back and take Aizen down in the process for hurting Rukia. He looked at her who met his gaze.

"What does he want her for?"

Rukia remained silent. Toshiro's communicator beeped. Kisuke glanced at him.

"Sir, the hollows have cleared out," Matsumoto's voice rang out. "But I need you back at the apartment. There's someone here you should see."

"Not now, Matsumoto," Toshiro replied tersely.

"Sir…" he heard static as someone was grabbing the small transmitter.

"Shiro-chan? Is that you?"

Momo.

"Where are you?" She asked, panicked.

"Hina…mori?" Toshiro was stunned. She was back? Did she escape? Was she let go? Was she hurt? A million questions went through his mind at once.

"Where are you? I need to see you!" Momo asked. Toshiro was about to reply when he saw the look on Ichigo's face.

"Sit with Matsumoto, I'll be there shorty." He turned off the transmitter and looked at Ichigo who was looking at him expectantly. "I'm sorry. I –"

"Just go. I'll look after Rukia," Ichigo said. He turned away and didn't look back. Toshiro hesitated.

"Go, Hitsugaya-kun. She will be looked after," Urahara repeated.

"I'll be back later." He took one last look at her before heading for the stairs.

"Kurosaki-san," Kisuke said. "There are some things I need to get from my shop; especially if we're going to help her."

"Will you help her?"

"Yes." Kisuke said as he headed for the stairs.

"Hachi?" Shinji asked as he looked at the barriers.

"It's not a problem. I will not underestimate her again."

"Hnn…"

"Are we going to train or what?" Hiyori asked.

"I think that's enough for one day," Shinji replied as he looked at the time. It was nearing midnight. "We'll set up a watch in teams of two."

"Now we have to babysit too?" She complained.

"Would you rather she visits you in the middle of the night?" Lisa asked. Hiyori scowled and looked away.

Teams and times set, the others scattered. Ichigo and Shinji took first watch. Shinji yawned as he sat down on a mat Hachi brought out before turning in. The sand, now thawed a bit, was wet. Ichigo watched as Rukia sat in the same position. She had not moved.

He was restless and agitated. Aizen had taken his friends. Turned Rukia into…that and now he had Inoue. He shook his head.

Rukia watched as they talked and separated. She watched as the white haired man left, then the one in the hat. She understood the watches and when they were to switch. She watched Ichigo with interest. His body language suggested he was upset and angry. Thinking made the pain worse. Moving was blinding. If only she could get out of there, back to the pink haired one. Granz. A shot of anger coursed through her. This was his fault.

She watched as Ichigo paced. He curled and uncurled his fingers. He would stop, say a few words to the man with the teeth and continue pacing. He had not tried to talk to her since the others left. Lord Aizen wanted this one. He was powerful beyond his own comprehension.

Ichigo sat on the mat in front of the box and looked at her. He felt his stomach tighten into knots, he started to feel a wave of nausea course though him as he looked into her eyes. They were cold and held no warmth. Not like they used to. He tried to imagine what she had gone though, what that bastard had done to her and realized he couldn't. He looked at her and knew it was a continuing battle with pain she was facing now. He vowed he would kill Aizen. Maybe have Inoue revive him so he could kill him again for what he'd done.

Shinji sat quietly and watched as Ichigo tried to comprehend what he was seeing.

"Rukia is gone." Ichigo said his voice flat.

"You don't fully believe that, do you?"

"If Aizen took her memories…changed her…"

"She is changed, but she is still Rukia. She is in there, somewhere."

"You think so?"

"Maybe in her inner world."

"What about her Zanpaktou spirit?"

"I don't know."

Ichigo turned back and looked at her. Her eyes were still open.

She listened with feigned interest. They were talking about her, she knew, but she didn't understand the words. Hollows, inner worlds, and Zanpaktou spirits – she knew they were important but not how they were related to her. She didn't want to think about _before._ The pain in her head was relentless. Ulquiorra would not come for her. Aizen-sama would not come for her. She was left behind.

"_Lord Aizen may control your life, but I control your death. Do you understand, Zero? You are nothing without me. That's what Zero means. Nothing."_

Ulquiorra once told her Granz like to live above his station. He liked to pretend he was better than everyone else except when Lord Aizen was around. He knew his place then. He also knew it when Ulquiorra brought her to see him before the mission. He tried to assert himself but Ulquiorra wouldn't have it. She wondered if he screwed up on purpose. To drive home the fact her life rested in his hands alone.

She would kill him if she saw him again.

Her eyes locked with Ichigo's. She saw the desperation and sadness there. Do emotions make one weak as Ulquiorra insists? Or do they give you strength?

She blinked.

Ulquiorra said he wasn't worth Aizen's interest. She heard the hollow inside of him and thought Ulquiorra might have underestimated him. He was powerful. Aizen-sama was right in wanting to watch him progress. His power had already increased since the first time she saw him.

"What are you going to do about your friend?" Shinji asked.

"I'm going to rescue her. I'm not going to let Aizen do to her what he's done to…" He closed his mouth.

"She will not be harmed," Rukia whispered. Ichigo and Shinji looked at her.

"How do you know?" Shinji asked.

"What does he want her for?" Ichigo asked.

Rukia's eyes never wavered from Ichigo's. She watched how his face relaxed a little.

"Urahara-san said you were in a lot of pain. Are you still?"

She said nothing.

"I'm sorry, Rukia." She looked at him as she watched a new emotion wash over his face. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. I'm sorry I didn't save you. If I had known…"

"It does not matter."

"It does matter. You are Nakama."

"I am Zero."

He shook his head at Aizen's new name for her.

"It does not matter. I will be dead soon." With that she closed her eyes.

Ichigo stared at her, mouth open.


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: For those asking, there will be an epilogue to Dreamscape… And another chapter to OTWTA soon…**

**Thank you for your reviews, alerts and your time! I honestly appreciate it!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 8<p>

"Shiro-chan! I was so worried!" Momo said as she flung herself at him as he opened the door to Inoue's apartment. As he held her, he caught Matsumoto drying her eyes as she sat on the couch. Renji was sitting next to her.

"Ikkaku and Yumichika are patrolling. We're switching with them in a few hours," Renji said. He looked at Momo and wasn't sure if he should continue, but he had to know. "Is she ok?"

"No," Toshiro replied. Momo looked at him quizzically.

"Who?"

Toshiro looked at her and frowned. Instead of answering her he looked at the pair on the couch. "What happened?"

"There were tons of them," Matsumoto said. "Gargantas started opening all around. Ten, twenty, thirty Arrancar class hollow were just in the school yard alone. Once you left, they started searching. Renji and I tried to engage them, distract them away from you but they had no interest in fighting. It was…odd."

"Once you were gone they stayed for a while, not really doing anything. I engaged a few and took them out easily. They hardly tried to defend themselves then they left," Renji finished.

"We continued to patrol the school area. When nothing else happened we searched the gym again. It was there another Garganta opened and Momo appeared," Matsumoto said. Toshiro looked at Momo. She seemed to be unharmed, thankfully. He gently pried her off of him and guided her to the couch. Renji stood up to make room.

Momo sat but refused to let go of Toshiro. She looked at him with wide eyes. "What happened, Momo?"

She frowned as she thought. "I don't really remember. I mean, I remember being in the 4th and I remember wanting to see you. The next thing I know, here I am."

Toshiro looked at her, "You don't remember anything?"

"No," she said as she started to panic.

"Momo, they said you were taken in the Dangai yesterday afternoon." Her eyes widened before becoming teary.

"I d-don't remember! I should remember, shouldn't I?" She started to shake. Toshiro wrapped his arms around her. "What happened? Why don't I remember?"

"We need to get you to the 4th to make sure you're ok."

"No! What if something happens again? What if they take me on my way back? Can't I just stay here with you?"

"Momo, I'm in the middle of a mission, I can't just – "

"Please? I'm scared," she pleaded.

"You can stay the night, but you're going to the 4th in the morning," he said as he relented. He felt her arms tighten around him.

"Erm, Taicho," Renji said curtly. "I need to speak with you privately."

Momo looked at him and frowned slightly. She felt the couch shift as Toshiro moved her arms and stood. "I'll be right back." She turned and watched as they went to the communication room.

"Are you hungry?" Matsumoto asked.

* * *

><p>"How is Rukia?" Renji demanded as soon as the door was closed.<p>

"She's not well," he replied honestly. He quickly filled Renji in on the main parts of the evening.

"Where is she? I want to see her."

Toshiro held his hand up. "I know you do, and you will, but your patrol tonight comes first."

Renji shook his head. "I'm not due on for a few hours. Why can't I go now?"

"I want you rested for your patrol for the mission."

"What?" He looked at him like he was out of his mind as his anger increased. "You're still thinking about the mission?"

"Yes, the mission."

"Don't you think there are more important things going on than patrolling? But then, now that Hinamori is back nothing else matters, right?" Renji said agitated.

"What?" he asked coolly.

"There is no reason I should have to wait to see her!"

"You're on dangerous ground, Abarai!"

"Am I? Cause I really don't give a fuck right now!"

"The patrols are important, maybe now more than ever! We have her back! Do you really think Aizen is done with her?" He shouted.

Renji balled his hands into fists.

"We have to protect her," Toshiro said lowering his voice.

"Which one?" Renji asked as he almost sneered.

Toshiro scowled, "Hinamori was taken yesterday and who knows what happened. I don't know what he wanted her for or why he let her go."

"All the more reason she should be in Soul Society, not here," Renji said. Toshiro ran his hand through his hair. He was frustrated.

"She's too unstable tonight. I'll send her in the morning."

"Will you?" Renji asked as he opened the door. He looked at him, shook his head and left.

The screen buzzed to life. Toshiro scowled. The gods truly hated him.

"Hitsugaya Toshiro!" The Soutaicho filled the screen. Toshiro buried his anger and frustration and cleared his face as best as he could.

"Sir!"

"According to the 12th there has been a lot of activity. What do you have to report?"

Damn it, the 12th and their sensors. Would they have been able to tell one of them was Rukia? Shit. Would they be able to tell she was left behind? Fuck. He cleared his throat.

"Yes, Sir. Two Espada showed up earlier this afternoon. Matsumoto and the human girl were alone at the school. Matsumoto immediately called for back-up. When I arrived, I found she was subdued. I fought with them, but they were able to take the human girl and escape."

"Who were the two?"

A line a sweat formed on his brow. This is the one thing he didn't want asked. He thought about the consequences of hiding her. The things Urahara said.

"The one who grabbed Inoue has been here many times before. He was here with another and watched as Kurosaki and his friends fought." He took a breath, "The other was an Espada as well…"

"Shiro!" Momo opened the door and stood next to him. The old man opened his eyes in shock. Toshiro jumped at his chance for distraction.

"After the fight with several more hollows another gate opened and Hinamori appeared. She has no recollection of what happened."

"Why did you not inform me of these events?"

"We just reached the apartment and started the investigation when you called," Toshiro looked at Momo who glued herself to his side. "She's pretty shaken up about not remembering."

"She is otherwise physically ok?"

"Yes, but I believe she should be evaluated at the 4th."

"No. The gates will remain closed. I want you to continue the investigation. I want to know why she was taken and why she was released."

"Surely the 4th has – "

"YOU will take charge of this. I do not like the fact Aizen can come at any time in both worlds and take who he wants. NO TRAVEL!" He faded out as the screen went dark. Toshiro took a deep breath and looked at Momo. He didn't know how he was going to answer the Soutaicho's question. They couldn't know he had her. Thankfully because of Momo, he didn't have to.

He smiled at her, "Come on, Momo. Let's get you settled." She stopped in front of him and gave him a kiss.

"Thank you for arguing with Abarai-kun and defending me."

"What are you talking about?"

"You were yelling at him about the patrols. You said that the patrols were important. You defended me."

Toshiro frowned.

"Do you think Aizen will want me back?"

"I don't know."

"I wish I remembered what happened."

He led her to the living room. Renji was next to Matsumoto again on the couch scowling.

"You should get some rest," Toshiro said as he looked at his friend. She looked exhausted.

"I don't want to be alone."

"I'll be here," Matsumoto said gently. Momo looked at Toshiro and blushed.

"I wish for you to stay with me, Shiro."

Toshiro frowned slightly.

"Come on, Ran. We should rest before our patrol," Renji said as he held his hand out for her. He led her to Inoue's bedroom. She had opened her home to them and shared her bedroom with Rangiku. Renji pulled out both futons and laid them side by side on the floor.

"You're upset," she said.

"He won't tell me where Rukia is. He won't let me see her." He was agitated and pissed off.

"I'm sure he will in the morning. He has his hands full with Hinamori's return."

"How do you think he would feel if I kept him from her?" He sighed as he plopped on the futon. "I don't trust her. The timing is too convenient."

"You think Aizen has something up his sleeve?"

"I don't know."

"Maybe Aizen changed his mind and wiped her memory before sending her back here."

Renji frowned at her.

"When has Aizen just let someone go?"

"You're right. He would have just killed her. We'll keep an eye on her. Come," she said as she held her arms out. Renji snuggled close, putting his head on her ample chest.

"It'll all work out."

"I hope you're right."

* * *

><p>Rukia opened her eyes and found there were different people watching her, but they were further away, chatting with themselves. The one called Ichigo was still there, staring intently at her. The pain in her head was relentless and felt like it had spread to her neck. Her vision was dim, things blurry.<p>

She knew she was going to die, without a doubt. It was currently a race between what Granz had done and what the Shinigami would do.

"You were always so annoying," Ichigo said softly. Rukia watched as a wistful expression crossed his face. "Yet you were always there for me right when I needed you to be." He watched as she tried to focus. He silently wished Urahara would hurry the hell up. "The day we first met you saved me and my family. You risked your own life to save mine."

"Not me," Rukia whispered. _Before_ didn't matter. _Before_ wasn't allowed to be questioned. _Before_ was gone. That is what Aizen-sama decreed.

Ichigo went on for the next hour talking about his adventures with Rukia while she listened. She found _before_ irrelevant and didn't understand why he continued to babble on yet found his voice soothing. The tone was comfortable. She stopped trying to make sense of what he was saying and closed her eyes. Not that she could see much through them anyway. He stopped his story telling and sat straighter.

"Is Rukia trapped in your inner world?" He asked as his thoughts danced around a theory. Rukia opened her eyes and looked at him, confused. "Like in my inner world, my Zanpaktou spirit and my hollow exist. They lend me their power when I need it. You said we were weak, only one of us in control at a time. How are you different?"

"I am Zero."

"What about Sode no Shirayuki, is she still there?"

Rukia blinked.

Ichigo stared at her feeling like he was on the brink of understanding something. Aizen couldn't have separated Shirayuki and Rukia only to leave the hollow. What would be the point? But if he could combine them like those siblings had done before…

He gasped as the knowledge hit him.

* * *

><p>"You're still here?" Love asked Ichigo. It was morning, shift change.<p>

"Yeah, the stup didn't want to leave the box," Hiyori said. She turned to Ichigo. "You know, I don't care that you were up all night. I'm not going to go any easier on you during training."

Ichigo didn't say anything but continued to watch Rukia.

"He hasn't moved all night according to Mashiro and Kensei who were on before we were," Lisa offered.

"Has she?" Rose asked.

"Only her eyes – they open, they close. That's it," Hiyori said. "Creepy. I'm hungry." The girls left to get breakfast while Rose and Love took positions on opposite sides of the box. Ichigo remained in front.

Rukia opened her eyes and saw that he was still there, watching her. He had been there all night. She found it curious how his amber eyes sought hers. He had spoken to her earlier, something about how they shared a connection. Memory or not, he would always be connected to her. She found his ramblings odd.

A loud bang came from behind her. She made the mistake and turned. She almost passed out; as she moved the pain radiated down her spine. Confused, she let loose her reiatsu; the temperature in the box dropped. Her breath quickened. Her vision was nearly gone and she threw her hands out in front of her; ice forming on the tips of her knuckles.

Ichigo stood. "Zero! It's ok!"

Shinji arched his eyebrow at Ichigo's use of Rukia's new name.

"What's going on?" Toshiro asked. He came down the ladder with Urahara. Hachi and Shinji joined the group.

"She can't see, the pain has taken over," Ichigo said simply. Toshiro frowned, not understanding.

"I'm sorry; this took longer than I thought it would. Considering I have no details on what exactly happened and what they've been using, I can only guess." Kisuke said as he came in and stood beside Ichigo. He looked like he was up all night as well. He peered inside the box. "I have something that should help with the pain."

Rukia held her breath. This was it. They were going to kill her now. Aizen-sama would be disappointed in her performance; her inability to overcome simple Shinigami. While she had wished many times for death and even waited for it, now that it was here, in front of her…her survival instincts kicked in. She wouldn't let them kill her. She had much to do for Aizen-sama. She had a pink haired freak to kill. Yes, she had a lot of things left to do before she died. Her eyes glistened as resolve set in.

Ichigo sensed the change in her and looked at Urahara. "She's not going to let you touch her."

Kisuke nodded to Shinji.

"Hachi?"

"No!" Ichigo yelled as he stood. "Don't drop the barrier!" He walked around the box so he faced her again. "Zero? It's ok. No one is going to hurt you."

Rukia shoved her hand onto the barrier and cried out as the electric shock ran through her body. She increased her reiatsu and pushed. The barrier bulged.

"Hachi?"

"Zero! Stop!"

Rukia, panting, drew her hands back to her lap. Her head was down but she was looking at him through her lashes. "Do not touch me."

"We can help you," Kisuke said. Rukia moved her eyes to him and looked like she was going to snarl. Ichigo waved Kisuke away.

"I'm not going to let anyone hurt you, Zero. I will protect you," Ichigo said.

Toshiro looked at Ichigo. What's this? He was already in a pissed off mood. He spent half the night with Momo to find, thankfully, Aizen had not touched her, only her memory was being blocked. The gods who hated him shone their brightest as he was denied his request to send her to the 4th because of the imposed block.

He had wanted to come back and be with Rukia as soon as possible but was unable to pry himself away from Momo without her asking too many questions. He didn't want her to know anything about Rukia. Matsumoto had talked to him before they went on patrol. She had her own concerns about Aizen's plans and how it might have involved both Momo and Rukia. No, it was better she didn't know anything.

He watched as Rukia looked at Ichigo. The shards of ice were gone and she didn't look quite so feral. Ichigo was here all night with her. He was able to establish some kind of connection, albeit a small one, with her. Jealousy smacked him like a blow to the gut. He forced it down as best as he could, but the anger remained.

"What happened last night?" Toshiro asked his words cold.

"I stayed with her," Ichigo scowled at the shorter man. "I talked to her. I told her a bit about her life before she was taken."

"So she will listen to you?" His hands curled into fists. He was tightly wound by jealousy and had to force his hands to open.

"No," Ichigo said. He turned his attention back to the girl in the box. She was on her hands and knees, panting.

"She needs this shot or she will die," Kisuke said simply.

"Zero – " Ichigo started.

"No! I will not die by a shinigami's hand so easily!" she said. She didn't think it would matter soon anyway. Her vision was gone, all she knew was pain. It had spread down her spine and into her limbs. It hurt to breathe.

"Urahara-san…" Ichigo watched as Rukia fell to her side.

"Hachi, now! She's out of time, everyone else get ready!" Urahara said. Everyone surrounded the box, swords drawn as Hachi let the barrier down.


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: This is so much fun…**

**Thank you all for your reviews! Thank you also to everyone else just reading! I appreciate you all!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 9<p>

Everyone held their breath as the barrier disappeared. They felt a blast of cold air, left over from her last push to break free. She didn't move.

Ichigo and Toshiro were by her side. Toshiro reached out and gently rolled her over. She had stopped breathing. He looked to Urahara who was already injecting her with some blue substance. The stuff he had been working on all night.

"Zero…" Ichigo said as he waited. Toshiro glanced at him and resisted the urge to shove him aside. He focused on Rukia instead.

"I think we were in time," Urahara said as he stood back. He looked at Shinji. "What you saw yesterday was a tiny glimpse of her power. Her ability to break though Hachi's barrier, for instance, was remarkable considering what she's been going through."

"You mean she was that powerful in a weakened state?"

"Exactly." Shinji's eyes grew. "Aizen does not call her Zero for nothing."

"But someone does," Ichigo offered. "One of the few times she spoke last night, she had said Zero meant nothing. She was nothing. "

Toshio felt a stab of pain at those words and put his hand over hers. It was cold. He was about to ask if there was anything else they could do when he saw her chest move.

"She's breathing!" He yelled out. He felt some of his tension ease.

"Hachi…" Shinji said. He was worried about her gaining consciousness and killing his friends. He thought again about the risk they were taking.

"It's ok," Urahara said. "She'll be out for a long time." He held up another syringe and injected her with that as well. Everyone relaxed. He mumbled a spell and Rukia was engulfed in green light. Toshiro released her hand, but stayed close.

Shinji moved and stood next to Kisuke. A green panel of light hovered near Rukia's head. Numbers and letters flashed quickly across the holo-screen. His eyes flicked from her body to the screen.

"This is…" Shinji stopped himself and frowned.

"Interesting?" Kisuke offered.

"Disturbing."

"What?" Toshiro demanded.

"Urahara-san…" Ichigo asked.

"It's like I was telling you yesterday. Her mind has been completely reconstructed and is in constant flux, trying to heal itself, but it doesn't know how. Too much has been done. She has instinct; she has basic thought, but not much else. This part here," he said as he pointed to the glowing panel, "represents emotions. While it wasn't removed, it has been altered. A lot has been altered. This part here…is very intriguing."

He waved his hand and the panel moved down her body then back up, stopping over her chest. He frowned and looked at Toshiro.

"Ok then, now that she'll be out for a while and I have some more information, I need to get back to my lab and do some more research."

"And you need to train, weakling," Hiyori said as she punched Ichigo in the stomach. Ichigo recovered quickly. He looked up to see Hachi bring out a small futon. Toshiro carefully picked up Rukia and laid her down on it.

"I'll be there in a minute," Ichigo told Hiyori who glanced at the three, rolled her eyes and went out to the grounds they were on the previous day. "So, what happened last night?"

"What?"

"You said you would be back. Something more important keep you away all night?"

Toshiro wasn't in the mood for his digs. "I was with Hinamori all night. She lost her memory. She can't remember anything after waking up yesterday morning."

"So Aizen returned her, just like that?"

Toshiro looked at him.

"She doesn't remember anything."

"You mean, she says she doesn't remember anything."

Toshiro's eyes were dark. "What are you saying, Kurosaki?" His voice was dangerous.

"Che, I'm not saying anything. But you can't ignore the fact she's been in Aizen's corner ever since Rukia's execution."

"I didn't say I was ignoring it." Now he was agitated.

"Good. She doesn't know that we have Zero then?"

"No."

"I hope you keep it that way."

Toshiro resented this line of questioning. ""Kurosaki, if you have a problem with me…"

"You'd know it," he said as he walked away.

His blood boiling, he turned back to Rukia. He knelt beside the futon and put his elbows on the edge. He put his hands through his hair and sighed, trying to let his anger dissipate. He hated this. He wanted things to go back to the way they were, once upon a time. He closed his eyes.

"_Toshiro!" Her laughter was as light as the wind. "What's this? Resorting to snowballs?" She asked as she shook the snow out of her hair. Her eyes sparkled in the afternoon sun. They had just completed a training session when Toshiro decided to be mischievous. _

"_It's called using your surroundings to your advantage," he said as he lobbed another at her. Her laugh was infectious as she picked up some snow._

"_My surroundings, huh?" She threw the snow at him and just missed his shoulder._

"_You throw like a girl, Kuchiki!" He teased._

"_Last time I checked, I was," she grinned as she threw another. This one hit him square in the forehead. He fell over backwards. "Score!" she yelled._

_Toshiro stayed down._

_Rukia stopped laughing. "Toshiro?" _

_Silence._

"_This isn't funny… Toshiro?" She dropped the snow she was holding and ran over to him. "Are you ok?"_

_Rukia was treated to a face full of snow as Toshiro sat up._

"_Tactics, Kuchiki," he said as he laughed._

_Rukia wiped the snow off her face. "You know this means war!"_

"_Does it?" He asked as he leaned over her. Their faces were close. He noticed their breath mingle in the cold air. She looked at him with her big violet eyes. She tilted her head slightly as he lowered his. Their lips met. He didn't notice the hell butterfly until it started reciting its message. _

_Momo had woken up from her coma._

"No…" he opened his eyes, wanting to hold onto that memory, not wanting to believe it was taken from her. Everything about their time together was gone. Buried in the back of his mind he was telling himself he should be happy this happened. No memories meant no guilt. He was free to be with Hinamori just as he decided. He dropped his head on her bed.

It was the worst decision he ever made.

He loved Hinamori. He loved her for a long time growing up. When he joined the academy he joined to be closer to her. But when he excelled and exceeded everyone's expectations, things changed. When he became Captain, things changed even more. He was finally in a position where he could protect her but their time apart had done its damage. He grew up in that time frame and while he was still protective of her and still loved her, it wasn't the same kind of love he felt when he was younger.

When he started seeing Kuchiki and spending more time with her he became confused. The feelings he started to have for Kuchiki were different, stronger. They were beyond anything he has ever felt for anyone. But there was his responsibility to Momo. He had promised he would always look after her and protect her. He didn't think he could do that and love Kuchiki. So he tried to push her away. He avoided spending time with her but it only made things worse. He felt horrible and found himself thinking about her all the time.

It was the evening he said Kuchiki's name when Momo kissed him that he realized he needed to end things with her. Of course, it didn't help that Momo had a fit. It took him weeks to gather the courage and then she confessed to him her feelings. He felt like an ass. He could so easily accept and return her feelings, but then he would be breaking his promise.

Confused, he did the only thing he knew to do. Break it off with Kuchiki. Keep her completely out of his life.

Toshiro lifted his head and looked at Rukia sleeping.

"I'm sorry…Zero. I never should have pushed you away. I never should have denied how I felt. Nothing has been the same since that day. I swear if I could take it all back, I would." He took her hand in his.

"Taicho, we've finished our patrol. Matsumoto is with Hinamori who wants to know where you are," Renji said as his voice cackled over the communicator.

Without opening his eyes, Toshiro said, "Ok, Abarai. Meet me in the shopping district."

"Be there in five."

Ichigo was taking a break from training and came over to the pair. He looked at Toshiro holding Zero's hand. "I'm going to meet Abarai and bring him here. Then I'll be spending some time with Hinamori this morning and afternoon. I can't have her suspicious. I'll be back tonight."

"Don't worry. I'll take care of Zero."

Toshio turned sharply and stared at Ichigo. He opened his mouth but closed it. What could he say?

"Call me if there's any change," he said and stood. He reluctantly let go of her hand. He closed his eyes before looking away. "I'll see you later."

* * *

><p>"MATSUMOTO!"<p>

Rangiku jumped as her Taicho yelled her name. She nearly fell off the couch. "What? When did I fall asleep?"

"I was about to ask you the same question along with where is Momo?"

"Huh?"

"Hinamori? Where is she?"

"She said she wanted to lay down, she wasn't feeling good." Rangiku said as she stood. She rushed to the back bedroom to find it empty. She checked the bathroom, also empty. Her hand flew to her mouth. "Oh no!"

Toshiro felt a vein pop in his forehead.

The front door opened and Momo came in holding a few grocery bags. She gave Toshiro a huge smile and lifted up one of the bags.

"I knew you would be coming home soon so I thought I would go out and buy some things for lunch. I was going to take Matsumoto, but she was so exhausted from the patrol that I figured she needed her rest. Besides, it was only the corner shop. I could see it from my window." She walked by Toshiro, gave him a kiss and continued on to the kitchen.

He wasn't happy. "Momo, you are not to leave this apartment unless someone is with you, do you understand?"

She put the bags on the counter and frowned. "I just wanted to make you something and the store was right there. I…I…"

He sighed and stepped towards her. He had the habit of forgetting how mentally fragile she was. "Too many things have happened, Hinamori. We only got you back last night. I know you said you were fine, but the fact remains you were missing for a day. I don't want that to happen again."

"I'm so sorry!" she said as she flung herself in his arms. "I didn't mean to make you worry about me!"

"I don't want you alone." She sniffed and nodded. He patted her on her head. "What are you making for lunch?"

"I have some ramen and amanattō," she said as she smiled again.

"Amanattō?" Toshiro asked as his interest perked.

"Yes, now let me fix it!" she said as she bounded off to the small kitchen.

Matsumoto looked at him from the couch with an apologetic look on her face. Toshiro ignored her and went to the communication room. There was a small couch off to the side where he laid down and started at the ceiling.

"_Ukitake-taicho sent me to train with you today, sir." Rukia said._

"_Why?"_

"_He thought you could help me seeing we share a similar element."_

"_I don't have time," he said simply. He didn't even bother looking up from his paperwork. Rukia frowned but stayed where she was. Agitated, Toshiro put down his brush and scowled at her. "I told you, I don't have the time."_

"_Is it not your job to help subordinates?"_

"_It's actually Matsumoto's. Go ask your – " He stopped, remembering what happened to Shiba. He looked at Rukia knowing it was her blade that went through him and saw her wince as she remembered as well._

"_I see."_

"_Kuchiki – "_

"_No… I understand. My Taicho doesn't quite know what to do with me either."_

"_You are not in my division."_

"_Does it matter?"_

"_Kuchiki – "_

"_Forget it. I'll just tell my Taicho you were too busy." Toshiro frowned. He didn't like the idea of letting Ukitake down. She turned and headed for the door._

"_Wait..." She stopped, a small smile forming on her face. Toshiro grumbled a bit. "Meet me at the training grounds in an hour. Do NOT be late!"_

"_Hai. Thank you, Taicho."_

She tried hard at their first practice session. Of course he knocked her flat on her ass several times. Toshiro smiled at the memory. She was determined and she fought back, not giving up. They practiced until it was dark. What he thought he would dread, turned into a day of amusement. He was impressed with what skill she had. She -

"Shiro?" Momo knocked on his door. "Lunch is ready."

"Thanks, Momo."

He went and sat with her and tried to eat. Even his favorite food was hard to swallow. He looked at the couch, Matsumoto was sprawled out, sleeping.

"Are you ok, Shiro? You seem distracted."

"I'm fine." He poked at his lunch a bit more and tried to clear his mind. "How about you? Are you feeling better? Do you remember anything about yesterday?"

"I feel fine. I was tired this morning, but I'm much better now." She sighed and pushed her plate away. "I want to remember, but every time I try and retrace my steps I come to a big blank wall. It's so frustrating."

"Don't try so hard. Maybe you're still blocked because you're thinking about it too much."

Momo smiled and put her hand in his lap. "It's all I've thought about. Maybe I need a distraction?" She lean over and softly kissed his cheek.

The front door opened. Toshiro turned around and saw Abarai scowling at him. Momo frowned and removed her hand as he moved to stand.

"How are things?" Toshiro asked.

Renji, still scowling, nodded his head. "The same." He looked at the couch and saw Matsumoto. His scowl eased. "When she wakes up, tell her I went to Urahara's."

Toshiro's ears perked. What was he going there for? Was there something new? Before he could come up with a way to get him alone to ask, he was back out the door. Toshiro frowned. He couldn't help but wonder if there was something wrong. Something he could help with.

He turned back to the table and pinched the bridge of his nose. "You look tired," Momo said sadly. "Would you like to lay down with me?"

"Maybe later, Momo. When Matsumoto wakes up," he said. He wasn't about to fall asleep and leave her alone.

"Oh, ok," she smiled. She knelt behind him and rubbed his shoulders. "Is it ok if I do this then?" she asked softly.

Toshiro closed his eyes and sighed. It felt good as she worked his muscles and eased some of the tension he had built up. He knew he should be thinking of a plan to take out this new type of hollow, or of what their next step should be in dealing with Rukia, but for the moment, he let himself relax.

"You have a lot on your mind. I'm sorry I am such a burden. Why don't we go out to dinner? Matsumoto said while I was here in the Living world I should try as many new things as I could. She said that might help me remember too."

"If you want," he said absently, his eyes still closed.

"There's this place called Karakura Café. Hanataro said it was really good but there's a bit of a walk to get there. It's on the other side of town, close to a train station. I'm not sure what that is, but that's what Hanataro said. He believes the trains are not running there anymore." Toshiro tensed. It was close to the visored warehouse. "Can we go there tonight?"

"Maybe some other time, Momo," he said as he got up. "I really need to start doing my share of this mission."

"Oh," she said sadly.

"I'm sure Matsumoto will take you somewhere nice before their shift."

"Yeah…I know she will, it's just…I want to go with you." She looked at him with her huge eyes. Toshiro started to feel guilty. None of what was happening was her fault. His decision and indecision wasn't her fault. The only thing she was guilty of was loving him. That made him feel worse. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her. Of course, he didn't want to hurt Rukia either and look what happened.

Momo's fault was being too naive and trusting. She followed Aizen loyally because that's the kind of person she is. She wasn't ready to be a fukutaicho. But Aizen needed her in that position so he could easily use her. He balled his hands into fists. He knew she was naive and used it to his advantage. He used everything to his advantage and didn't care about anything or anyone.

He took a deep breath.

"I suppose I could take time to have dinner with you tonight." It's not like Rukia was going anywhere, he thought. An image of Ichigo sitting by her side the previous night made a shot of jealousy pipe through his system. "But not there. I have a lot of work to do, so it will have to be somewhere close by."

"Oh! Thank you Shiro!" she said as she hugged him. She kissed the side of his face and ran her hand through his hair. "I'll go get ready!"

"But we just had lunch!"

"I'll need the extra time for our date!" She said, already down the hall.

* * *

><p>"So this is where you've been hiding," Ishida said as he looked at the warehouse. They were just inside the upper portion. He, Chad and Ichigo were standing just inside. Shinji had ok'd the meeting although he wasn't thrilled with more people knowing of their whereabouts.<p>

"Training," Chad said as he corrected Ishida. He had been training with Renji in Urahara's "basement" recently. They knew Ichigo was training but did not know where or with whom.

"Yeah, look, I didn't ask you to come here to take a tour, there's something I need to tell you," Ichigo said. He was agitated.

"About your hollow?"

"About Inoue."

Ishida frowned. "Is she ok?"

"Is she training here too?"

"Yesterday late afternoon two Espada showed up at the school. She was with Matsumoto-san, but…" Ishida's hand curled into fists. "She was taken. Urahara is working on opening a Garganta so I can go after her, but it's going to take some time."

"You know I'll go," Ishida said.

"What would Aizen want with Inoue?" Chad asked.

"Probably her powers, they are pretty unique," Ishida said. "I can't wait to get my hands on one of them."

Ichigo looked away and took a few steps towards the hatch.

"When they attacked yesterday afternoon, Matsumoto was able to get a call out. Hitsugaya showed up and was able to separate the Espada." He reached the hatch and opened the door. "One of the Espada didn't make it to the Garganta and was left behind."

"What?"

"They left one behind?" Chad asked as he pounded his fist into his hand.

"Let's have at him!" Ishida said. "Is he here?"

Ichigo put his hands up. "Hold a on a second."

"No! These bastards have Orihime! We have a bargaining chip! Maybe we can make a trade. Have you questioned him? I'll bet he's not happy about being captured," he finished an evil glint in his eye.

"Ishida…"

"If we can't use him to bargain with Aizen, then maybe we can get information out him. Fight with him and find his weak points we can use with the others."

"Ishida!" Ichigo said anger in his voice. He was rethinking taking them down to the basement. "We're not going to bargain and we're certainly not going to give her back to Aizen!"

"But if we can get Orihime back I don't care!"

Chad put his hand on Ishida's shoulder and looked at Ichigo.

"Her?" he asked quietly.

Ichigo sighed. "The one that was left behind…the one we have…" he closed his eyes, "its Rukia."

"Kuchiki-san?" They both exclaimed at the same time.

"Come on, I'll show you." He opened the hatch and explained what they knew about her as they went down.

Still sleeping, Rukia lay on the futon. Although unconscious, Hachi put up another barrier around her. Renji was with her, frowning. He looked up and acknowledged the others as they arrived.

Ishida looked her over and matched Renji's frown. "So, if what you say is true, there is no hope in getting Kuchiki-san back."

"Maybe not," Ichigo said.

"Then maybe what I said about using her would be an option," Ishida said.

"You can't be serious!" Ichigo argued.

Ishida put his hands up, "Hey! I'm all for saving her, but it doesn't sound like a separation is possible."

"So what? We give her back to Aizen and say 'Here, we don't think you've fucked with her enough?'"

"We can kill her," Renji said quietly.

"You too?" Ichigo said as his head whipped around, "I can't believe this."

"If there's no way we can save her…We have to look at this from a different perspective. Would she have wanted to live like this? Knowing she was hurting her friends?" Renji said.

Ichigo shook his head. "This is Rukia."

"Yes, strong willed, putting other's before herself, Rukia. You know she wouldn't want this had she been given a choice..." Renji said.

"She may look like her, but that's not her anymore," Ishida said. "Kuchiki-san is gone."

"You're wrong. Rukia is still there only she's Zero now."

Renji looked at him skeptically.

"I have a feeling that Aizen used the Hogyoku to combine her spirits together. Rukia, Sode no Shirayuki, her hollow…they're all the same person now."

"How do you separate them?"

"You don't," Urahara said as he finished descending the stairs. "Based on my limited study of her, you're right Kurosaki-kun."

His face fell. "So it is like that other time."

"With the siblings? Yes," Urahara said as he pressed his lips together.

"But you were able to separate them!" Renji said, excited. "You can do it again!"

"I'm afraid it's a bit different this time, more permanent." Urahara said. "Maybe if the Hogyoku wasn't involved, but Aizen…"

"So what can we do?" Ichigo asked.

"I don't know. I have a better idea of what's been done and I can help heal her mind, but what she does with it…"

"All the more reason we should bargain with Aizen for the return of Orihime." Ishida said as he looked at Urahara. "Even with her mind healed, she'll be unpredictable at best. Who is to say we can convince her to be on our side? I can't imagine Soul Society…" he stopped as something dawned on him. "They don't know, do they?"

"They want her destroyed," Ichigo said bitterly.

"Well then – "

"No!" Ichigo turned and faced his friend. Ishida looked at the intensity of his eyes and backed down and shook his head.

"Let me know when we're leaving for Inoue-san. I have some things I need to do."

"Not a word about Zero to anyone." Ichigo warned. Ishida gave a curt nod and headed for the ladder.


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: Life is getting in the way again… **

**Thank you for your reviews alerts and those that just read. I appreciate you all!**

**Vocab – Rirakkusu: Stand down. Shihai: Control. Mou ii jo: Stop, enough. (although I think that's next chapter…)**

* * *

><p>Chapter 10<p>

It was late evening by the time Toshiro reached the warehouse. He opened the hatch and went down the ladder. Shinji and Hiyori were off to the side, arguing. The other visoreds were in the upper warehouse doing their own thing. Ichigo was kneeling beside Rukia; his head in her lap, eyes closed. He took a deep breath as familiar feelings of jealousy started to rise.

Scowl firmly in place, he let himself in the barrier and took a position on her other side. He resisted the urge to shove Ichigo off of her. Instead he focused on her face. She no longer looked tortured by pain. Her eyes were closed, her breath even. Her face was relaxed; she was as beautiful as ever.

As his eyes traveled downward, they landed on her chest and the hole that was now in place of her heart. He frowned. Maybe it was too late for Rukia. Maybe she was gone forever. Tossed aside by one person then the next, never having the happiness she managed to find last. He closed his eyes. He was no different. He should have been man enough to admit his feelings, should have been man enough to tell Momo that he would keep his promise, but he loved Rukia. He never should have pushed her away. Never should have broken it off with her.

For a prodigy, he was stupid.

His eyes opened and fell on the orange mop and his hand twitched. Still fighting to urge to shove him, he thumped Ichigo on his head instead, waking him up.

"You're going to drown her in your drool."

"Huh?" he said, bleary eyed. He stretched and blinked a few times.

"How is she?"

Ichigo matched the scowl on his face with one of his own. "How good of you to come."

Toshiro sat down. "It looks as if the pain eased."

"Yeah," Ichigo said as he sat up. He had a faraway look on his face. "I met with Chad and Ishida today. Told them what happened with Inoue. When Urahara-san can get the gate open, we're all going."

Toshiro nodded. He expected as much.

"Renji wasn't happy to see her," Ichigo said as he stared at the bone on her hand. "He thinks she's too far gone. That we've lost her. Ishida agrees in that we should take advantage and kill her now or use her to get Orihime back."

Toshiro sat for a while before speaking. "Maybe we have lost her."

Ichigo frowned. "If that's the case…"

"If that's the case then we can't help Rukia," Toshiro said as he looked up. Their eyes met. "We'll help Zero."

Ichigo raised an eyebrow.

"Rukia will always be a part of Zero. That's all that matters," he said quietly. He touched her hand.

"You really care for her." He said his voice flat.

"I didn't know how to keep my promise and love another. She suffered because of my stupidity and that is something I will never forgive myself for."

"Che…You know she wouldn't want you here out of some kind of obligation."

"I know. It's not just that," he closed his eyes.

Shinji and Hiyori finished their argument and separated. Shinji looked over at Ichigo and Toshiro before heading up the ladder. Hiyori came over and plopped down next to Ichigo. "Are we going to finish this session or do you need to gawk at sleeping beauty more?"

"I'm not gawking."

"Whatever."

"Let's go," Ichigo said as he stood. The two of them left leaving Toshiro alone.

He watched her for several minutes as his mind sifted through memories of her.

_Toshiro looked up from his paperwork as Rukia entered his office. It was late, almost dark. He was trying to catch up from being gone for the previous few days on a mission._

"_I thought you would be hungry, working late and all," she said as she set a bento on his desk. He eyed it but continued with his papers. Rukia stood in front of his desk._

"_I'll get to it, thank you."_

"_Toshiro…"_

_He didn't say anything, just kept working._

"_Never mind," she said as she turned for the door. Toshiro watched as the door closed._

He was an idiot and a coward. All he had to do was tell her that he was trying to help Hinamori in their old district, help her settle in, help her gain her strength back. He shook his head before placing it on her chest.

"I don't think I can ever apologize enough for the things I have done. I know you won't ever remember, but I will never forget."

"_So, I have cleared things with my Taicho and I now have tomorrow off. I am glad that you are going to go with me to visit my old friends. With Renji off on a mission, I didn't want to miss telling them about our past year. I know it's a bit silly to still visit the hill every year, but when they died, it changed everything for both Renji and I -" He looked at her and frowned. "What?" She asked. While she expected a range of reactions, frowning wasn't one of them._

"_Rukia…something came up and I can't go with you."_

"_What?" She looked at him with her big violet eyes. He could see the Kuchiki mask as it slid into place so easily, hiding her emotions._

Toshiro squeezed his eyes tighter.

"_Toshiro, I'm so glad you're back! I – "_

"_We need to talk. I can't right now, but meet me later." He watched as the excitement in her eyes shifted and changed into concern._

"_Oh…ok."_

"_If you'll excuse me, I need to make my report," he said as he lifted his hand and indicated the door._

"_O-of course. I'll see you later."_

He had it all planned out. How he was going to tell her about Momo, but once he saw her…

"_So, what's up?" She asked him, her face still showing a measured amount of concern. She had waited for him at the training grounds where they usually talked._

"_Rukia, there's something I need to tell you. I – " he stopped and looked at her. His breath caught, stopping him from continuing. She was looking at him with her beautiful eyes. He couldn't do this. He couldn't hurt her. He would make this work. He would find a way._

"_What is it?"_

"_I, uh…" He ran his hand through his hair. "I..uh…wanted to know if you would like to accompany me to the third district. They opened a new place to eat that's supposed to be good."_

_Rukia let out the breath she was silently holding in relief. She blinked a few times and smiled. "That's what you wanted to talk about? Taking me out to dinner?" She touched his arm as her eyes lit up. "Why, Taicho, are you asking me out on a date?"_

_Toshiro blushed._

"_I suppose I am."_

He shook his head. "I can't fix it, but I can protect you. I won't let Aizen, Soul Society or anyone hurt you. I'll do everything I can to keep you safe," he held her limp hand to his chest as he made his vow.

He turned to see Kisuke walk up and stand beside him. He was holding another syringe.

"This will keep her unconscious for a while longer as it helps start to heal what they have done to her," he watched as Toshiro's eyes widened with excitement. "It's not going to bring Rukia back, but it will help her relieve some of the pain and restore some of the brain's functions that were tampered with."

Toshiro nodded and absently watched as the blue liquid was injected into the back of her neck.

"The skin is softer here in this area. It's not like the rest of her, like an Arrancar, hard. I believe this is so they can maintain control," Kisuke continued.

"They control her mind?"

"They took her memories, why stop there? Why not control what she thinks, what she feels, how she acts?"

"How?"

"I don't know the specifics, but between the scan and the fact she's still receiving some kind of constant treatment from them…it was the best conclusion."

Toshiro shook his head. "Utter control…"

"She isn't going to heal overnight. There's too much damage. She's going to have a long road ahead of her. We all will."

Toshiro nodded as he met the man's gaze with a determined one of his own. He wouldn't let her down again.

As the morning came, Toshiro opened his eyes. Rukia was still asleep. Kisuke had given her another shot so she would stay that way until her mind had a chance to heal. Then they would begin the next phase. Re-training her mind and giving her back some of the things she lost. Control being the main thing. Hopefully in the process, she would realize they were on the same side.

He watched as she slept. Shinji suggested she might be an asset in the war. Toshiro wouldn't hear it. It wasn't an option. Ever. There was no way he would allow Aizen the chance to have at her again. Kurosaki had backed him up on that. He frowned as his eyes shifted to where the orange head was still sleeping on a mat on the other side of Rukia. He had feelings for her as well.

He sighed and stretched. He had to get back to the apartment, make his report and check on Momo. Maybe she remembered something. Maybe she knew why Aizen took her for only a short time.

"You leaving?" Ichigo said as he sat up.

"Only for a few hours. I should be back by lunch."

"What about Hinamori?"

"Matsumoto will take care of her today. I've shortened the patrols but am keeping everyone on alert so she can stay with her."

"Well, we'll see you later then, " Ichigo said as he turned his attention back to Rukia.

* * *

><p>She was weightless… Floating…<p>

Everything was dark, unable to see or feel anything, including what was the constant pain in her head.

Had death finally come for her?

"_I'm sorry, Rukia…"_

Voices…

Whose? It wasn't anyone she knew, was it?

"_I promise to protect you…"_

He sounded sorrowful, determined.

Protect…

Me…

Why?

She tried to focus; the male was speaking about _before - _a time when they were…together. She felt herself close to the surface, his voice clearer. This wasn't the same one who was with her before, Ichigo. This was someone else who knew her. She listened as he spoke of their time and his regret on how he would have made things different.

Then another male had joined him. She listened as they talked, confused.

Memories…stolen…

She wanted to hear more. She wanted to understand. They weren't trying to kill her. They were trying to…help? Why?

The voices became harder to hear as she floated back down into the darkness. She struggled as she tried to maintain focus.

Failing, everything went dark.

* * *

><p>He pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. He didn't exactly <em>lie<em> to the Soutaicho, just omitted and avoided anything having to do with Rukia. His conscience started bothering him about his oath to the Court Guards. He had already violated that oath.

Things were going to become more complicated.

A soft knock interrupted his thoughts.

"Are you finished with your report?" Matsumoto asked as she opened the door.

"Yeah."

"How is she? Renji told me he thinks she's too far gone."

"He's wrong," he said fiercely.

She gave him a sad smile and decided to switch topics.

"Hinamori is making you a snack to take with you on patrol. She spent most of the night putting it together."

"Fine." He stood and made his way towards the door. He was frustrated Momo still couldn't remember anything after trying a few relaxation techniques and he was anxious to get back to Rukia. Discussion with the others about her recovery needed to take place, along with a long term plan of keeping her from Aizen and Soul Society.

"Wait!" Momo said as she ran to Toshiro. He stopped close to the front door and looked at his friend. She gave him a kiss and handed him a bag of amanattō. "Be careful on patrol!"

"Uh, yeah, thank you," he said as he left.

"Want to go shopping with me?" Matsumoto asked as she came out of the hallway.

"Sure, care to have a snack first?"

* * *

><p>Toshiro made his way down the ladder and looked around. Hachi and Ichigo were sitting near the futon, talking.<p>

"Where are the others?"

"They're with Urahara talking about Zero. They're trying to come up with the best way to handle her rehabilitation," Ichigo said. Toshiro immediately frowned.

"Why wasn't I – "

"Hinamori is why. Urahara was going to come in this afternoon, but Shinji had some other errands to run. The others followed him."

"I see," he said. It still pissed him off. He sat down and opened the bag of amanattō.

"Oooh, can I have one?" Hachi asked. Toshiro held the bag for Hachi and Ichigo to have some of the treat. Hachi downed several pieces.

"These aren't that bad," Ichigo said.

"Any change?" Toshiro asked as he nodded to Rukia who was sleeping soundly on the cot.

"None."

Ichigo looked at the ground. "I'll be leaving in a few days."

"You're going after Inoue?"

"Of course." Ichigo said it so naturally, like there was never any doubt. Toshiro envied him for a moment before his thoughts turned. Ichigo wouldn't have hesitated to go after Rukia. If he had known about it then, she might not have had to suffer as much as she did. She might have still been a Shinigami. Toshiro's anger rose. HE should have gone. His heart started to pound and he felt a wave of nausea pass through him. He looked over to Hachi who had his eyes closed.

"Hachi!" The big man fell over, passed out.

"I don't feel so well," Ichigo said. Toshiro turned to the sound of the hatch door opening and watched as a small figure made their way down the ladder. His vision blurred as another wave hit him. He looked at the bag of amanattō he brought and then looked at Ichigo. Ichigo was on his knees holding his stomach and was sweating.

Toshiro was on his hands and knees, trying to focus his vision on the small figure. He was going to pass out soon. The figure was now at Rukia's side.

"Hina…mori!" he exclaimed. He tried to focus as he watched her bring out a syringe and inject Rukia with it. He felt the cold as Rukia moaned and awakened. Her reiatsu spilled and flowed around her.

Ichigo wasn't in any better shape as he realized what was going on. He held his hand out as he watched Momo assist Zero. She stood and saw the three men on the ground and narrowed her eyes. She exerted her reiatsu and focused on Momo.

"Rirakkusu!" Momo yelled with her hands raised defensively. "Lord Aizen sent me to save you and bring you home!"

"Save me?" Rukia asked. The pain in her head had receded to a dull throb. Definitely manageable considering how it was. She flexed her fingers. She regarded the woman in front of her.

"Hinamori Momo. Aizen-sama was my Taicho before he left. I wanted to go with him, but he didn't…he didn't take me," tears were building in her eyes.

Rukia ignored them instead she looked at Ichigo and cocked her head.

"I didn't hurt them, only incapacitated them for a while," Momo said.

Rukia took a few steps and stumbled as her muscles protested being used after so long. As she fell to her knees her gaze met Toshiro's as his eyes were closing. He managed to keep them open as he looked at her. "Why?" she asked.

Toshiro couldn't answer, his thoughts jumbled. _ Momo betrayed me…again. What is she asking? Did she hear me? She's going back to Aizen! No! Momo is taking her away from me…I…_

Not getting an answer, Rukia stood and tried to open a Garganta. Confused, she looked at Momo. "This warehouse is protected by a kido barrier, come on. We need to get outside." Momo headed for the stairs.

Rukia looked at Toshiro and Ichigo once more.

"Zero! Come on! They won't be out for long!" Rukia turned and followed Momo up the ladder.


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: Happy Belated Mother's Day! **

**Shou - Destroy Hanashi - speak  
><strong>

* * *

><p>Chapter 11<p>

Momo and Rukia reached the top of the ladder. Momo mumbled a few words and touched the barrier. As she spread her arms, she made a hole big enough for them to go through.

"Come on!" she said.

Rukia stepped over and through the barrier. As she looked up she saw they were surrounded. Instantly, her eyes flashed to Momo. "I didn't know they were coming back! I swear!" she pleaded.

"Hyapporankan!" Shinji yelled. A rod of energy formed in his hand shaped like a javelin. He threw it towards Rukia. Seeing this, Momo pushed her out of the way as the rod separated into smaller rods and pinned her to the side of the warehouse.

Rukia lifted a finger. Yellow light emitted and flew from the tip as she pointed it towards Shinji. The yellow rope wrapped itself around him, binding his arms to his side. Momo's eyes grew, she was shocked. Hiyori engaged her hollow mask. The others followed suit. Shinji saw Rukia as she narrowed her eyes, calculating.

"Hold on, guys," he said. "I acted first." He turned to Rukia, "That's impressive. You're still able to perform kido without any incantations." Rukia looked at him. He was trying to diffuse the situation. Of course, he posed no threat now that his arms were banned.

"Visored," she said.

"Yes, you remembered? I'm surprised considering the state of your mind is mush." She looked at him for several moments. Finally losing interest she turned and lifted her hand.

"We can fix it," Shinji said. Rukia paused and turned.

"Aizen-sama can restore order," she said.

"We are Aizen's creations," he said. He threw Hiyori a warning look to keep her quiet. "We would not be visored if it were not for him."

"Not like me," she said softly.

"No…We're not like you," he admitted. "You are his perfection." She looked at him doubtfully.

"I am nothing."

Shinji frowned. He wasn't sure how to proceed. He could try to take her down, but would more than likely get someone killed. He could let her go, but she would be back in Aizen's hands doing his bidding. He had to stall. Kisuke would be here soon.

"I know a lot about chaos," he said darkly. "Aizen wanted to know if he could turn Shinigami into hollows. That is what he did with us. He turned us." Rukia watched with interest. "It was the worst feeling in the world. It was like drowning – being taken over by another entity; fighting to stay in control."

"Fighting chaos," Rukia said softly.

"Yes. So in that respect, we are the same. Ichigo knows of chaos more so because he is human." Speaking of which, Shinji wondered what happened to him and Hachi. He shivered thinking the worst.

"Ichi-go," Rukia whispered.

"Yes. Is he ok?"

Rukia tilted her head slightly towards Momo. Shinji understood, Momo took them out. He felt a little better as he eyed the little Shinigami.

"We're out of time, Zero! Open the Garganta!" Momo said. Rukia lifted her hand once again.

"I can help you overcome the disorder and the pain!" Shinji said, hoping to stall her a little more. Surely Kisuke would be here any minute.

"Aizen-sama can restore order," she repeated.

"You don't need him to do that!" He snapped. "You are strong enough to do it on your own!"

Rukia was growing frustrated in trying to understand what this man, who was of Aizen's creation, was trying to say. Order without Aizen-sama?

"He's trying to trick you!" Momo cried out when she saw that Rukia wasn't making a move to open a Garganta. "We need to get back to Aizen-sama."

"You! Shut it!" Hiyori yelled as she pointed her sword at her. Rukia turned towards Momo. Kensei made a move and lunged forward. Without turning back, Rukia pointed her left hand at an angle to his feet. Several shards of ice shot out of her hand, pinning his feet to the ground. Slowly, she turned her head.

"I told you not to do anything!" Shinji shouted.

"I thought I would use the distraction," he replied lamely.

"She wasn't distracted. She knows where everyone is, make no mistake," turning back to her, "How is the pain in your head? Did what we give you help?"

Rukia remembered not wanting to be touched by these people but being too weak to stop them. So they did give her something. Why?

"It is tolerable."

"But still there?" He was genuinely surprised.

The door to the warehouse flew off of its hinges as Toshiro burst through, Ichigo close behind. Both pale and out of breath.

"You're paying for that," Shinji said.

Toshiro was relieved to see Rukia still there. He turned and saw Momo pinned to the warehouse.

"YOU!" he cried out as he started towards her.

"Zero, Shou! Destroy them all!" she shrieked. Rukia's eyes flickered as all thoughts were instantly gone and replaced by the order to kill.

"Zero, no!" Shinji said.

Momo laughed. "She has no choice! As soon as I gave her the order your life is over! She can't physically go against that order even if she wanted to! The only way she will stop is if you kill her."

In a flash Rukia swiped Kensei's sword from his hand and swung. Metal clanked with metal as Toshiro engaged her. Turquoise met violet as their swords crossed and held. Toshiro felt the power of her reiatsu push against his own. It instantly reminded him of their many training sessions. Their reiatsu mingled, hers was darker then he remembered.

"Destroy the Shinigami," she whispered as she pushed him away. Toshiro stumbled back a few steps as he realized he was still weakened by Momo's annatto.

"Soten ni zase, Hyorinmaru!" Toshiro called out as he recovered his footing. He threw the ice dragon towards her; Rukia took Kensei's sword and struck the dragon. She was at a disadvantage not having her own Zanpaktou. A lot of her moves now limited including her release.

She lifted her finger and shot a white lightning bolt.

"Byakurai! " Toshiro said amazed. "You can do kido?"

"With no incantations," Shinji said, still bound. He nodded to Hiyori who came over to help him. Love and Rose went to release Momo from the rods and restrained her. Mashiro and Lisa started digging at the ice near Kensei's feet, trying to free him.

"No! What are you doing? Not him!" Momo screamed ignoring the two who were now at her side. "Not Shiro!"

Rukia fired off several blue waves of reiatsu reverting to Rukia's favorite Sokatsui. Toshiro countered and slashed, sending Hyorinmaru spiraling out. The ice dragon hit midway and split into three dragons, each going a different way. Two attacked Rukia from both sides, the third straight up the middle. Rukia jumped in the air missing the two and threw shards at the third as it tried to follow her, deflecting its path.

She took the sword and broke the ice, shattering the dragon once again. Toshiro kept reminding himself that this wasn't a training session with her, this was real. He looked at her and gasped. She stood with her hands out, spaced almost a foot apart. Inside was a glowing red ball.

"Cero!" Toshiro said, shocked.

"Zero, Mou ii yo!" Ulquiorra said as he stood at the entrance of a Garganta. No one noticed it open a few yards from where they were standing. Rukia separated her arms, instantly dissipating the cero charge. She maintained a defensive stance and stood still. All eyes turned to the emerald eyed Espada.

"I will not let you take her!" Toshiro yelled as he pointed his sword towards him.

"You do not have a choice," he said simply. Suddenly Gargantas opened all around them. Hollows of every shape and size filtered through. Toshiro was about to charge after him when the sky ripped apart. "Menos Grande!" Turning his attention back, he saw Ulquiorra extend his hand towards Rukia. "NO!" he screamed and lunged towards her. He felt a sword impale his shoulder as a nearby hollow grabbed him and held him back. He push him aside only to find he was surrounded by a massive number of hollow. Three struck in one fluid motion, cutting his thigh, calf and ankle. Still getting over the drug Momo had given him, he fell to his knees, he watched helplessly as Rukia dropped Kensei's sword, lifted her hand and put it in Ulquiorra's. She turned her head and their eyes met briefly as the gate closed.

Toshiro screamed again, "Bankai!" and unleashed his fury on the surrounding hollows, killing most of them by himself. He turned to see the visoreds had pushed the Menos Grande back and the sky was sealing itself.

He pulled out the hollow's sword from his shoulder and noticed the empty clank sound it made as it hit the ground. Empty. Ignoring the bleeding and fueled by rage, he stepped through the warehouse door and flew down the ladder. He ignored the others as they followed him, concerned as to what he was going to do next. He crossed the small field and forced himself between Love and Rose. He grabbed Momo by her collar and lifted her into the air.

"This is the last time you betray me, Hinamori! You will tell me everything you know about Rukia and you will tell me now!"

Momo's eyes were wide as she made choking sounds. Ichigo, now fully recovered, placed his hand on Toshiro's shoulder. "She can't talk in that position," he said gently. Toshiro dropped her.

She landed ungracefully and looked at Toshiro with tears in her eyes. "You're bleeding!"

"Answer me!" he yelled. His voice was cold.

"Zero…Zero is more than an Espada. She is a weapon." Momo's eyes were on the ground, tears fell silently as she spoke softly, defeated. "Only Aizen-sama and a chosen few know all of her commands. That's how they control her."

"You were able to control her." Shinji said.

"That was only a temporary command. It's a back up Aizen-sama created for emergencies like this."

"So she no longer has a mind of her own?" Hiyori asked.

"She does," Ichigo said firmly.

Momo nodded. "She has her own control until a command is given."

"I thought you said she would kill until she was killed?" Shinji asked.

"They didn't tell me how to stop her," she said sadly.

Toshiro shook his head. "How long?" Momo raised her tear filled eyes. "How long have you been working for him?"

She cried harder and shook her head. "I…I've never st-stopped."

Toshiro's eyes grew before his hands fisted. He had to get out. Now. Before he blew up, hit her or…he didn't know. As he turned to leave, Momo was on her feet and tried to grab him. Love and Rose restrained her.

"Shiro!" She yelled. He continued towards the ladder. "SHIRO!" She screamed before bursting into hysterical tears.

Toshiro slammed the hatch down, sealing the noise. He slowly walked outside of the warehouse, stopping to pick up a piece of ice mixed with snow. He put it to his face, trying to absorb her reiatsu. He fell to his knees.

"Rukia," he said as his breath hitched into a sob. He closed his eyes and fell face down into the ground.

* * *

><p>"You came for me," Rukia said as they reached Los Noches.<p>

"Are you surprised?" He asked as he looked at her. She looked better then the last time he saw her. Granz was sure she would die and Aizen was…different. He was calm about the whole matter. Ulquiorra thought he would fly into a rage, but since losing his newly gained eye to show Aizen firsthand what happened, he gave a nod and that was it. Rukia said nothing so he continued. "Lord Aizen used one of his shinigami's to find you and break you out of the barrier. It was blocking your reiatsu; we didn't know where to look for you."

They stopped in front of the doors to the throne room. He looked her over once more. "You are no longer in pain?"

"Not as much," she said as she took a step forward towards the door. His hand reached out and held her arm.

"What happened?" He wasn't sure why he was asking, but a part of him wanted to know before Aizen.

"I died, they saved me," she said simply. Ulquiorra was taken aback.

"You…died?" Even though she was standing before him, clearly alive, he felt a small surge of anger run thought him. He blamed Granz and wanted to kill that idiot for not taking care of her.

Rukia's eyes met his. "I will challenge Granz." Ulquiorra reached for and pulled out a sword from his hip. He released her arm and presented it to her. Rukia's eyes widened for less than a second before she reached out and took it.

"You recovered it," she said as she felt the comforting weight of her own Zanpaktou back in her hands.

"Of course," he said. He caught her expression, even if it was fleeting. Her mind was healing. He wondered if Aizen would allow it to heal on its own or if he was going to have Granz strip her of everything once again. He found himself irritated at the thought.

The door to the throne room opened revealing Ichimaru's grinning face.

"Welcome home, Zero!" he said as he hugged her. Rukia stood still. Ulquiorra frowned. Gin put his hand on her lower back and guided her into the room. "Come, Aizen will be pleased."

Rukia entered. Aizen was on his throne and a girl with orange hair in a white Arrancar uniform was standing before him. She was the same one who threw herself in front of Ichigo. Grimmjow was standing next to her. All eyes focused on Rukia as the door closed. She registered the look of shock on the girls face before she looked away. Grimmjow was wearing his usual smug grin.

Rukia walked to the front and bowed down looking at the floor. Aizen stood and walked down the steps and stood in front of her. He caressed the side of her face before lifting her chin. As their eyes met, the thoughts in her mind ceased. He looked at her for a long time, easing the rest of the pain in her head. It was almost hypnotic.

"Welcome home, Zero," he said softly. He gently pulled on her chin and Rukia stood before him. "Were you worried I would abandon you?" She said nothing, enjoying the silence in her mind. He leaned over and gently pressed his lips against her forehead and held them there.

Grimmjow grew uncomfortable and cleared his throat. Aizen stepped back, "I will never abandon you, Zero." His eyes flicked to Ulquiorra. "Come, you should see this," he said as he took her hand. He led her up the stairs and had her sit in the seat reserved for Gin, on his right. He sat in his chair and re-focused on the girl.

"I would like to see a demonstration of your healing power, Orihime." He looked at Grimmjow's missing arm. "Our scientists have not been able to successfully reattach his arm since Zero cut it off. Heal him."

"B-but…I…" She stammered. She looked wildly from Grimmjow to Rukia. "K-k-kuchiki-s-san," she said. Rukia looked impassive.

"Heal him," Aizen said again.

She turned to face Grimmjow and swallowed. She touched her hair pins, "Sōten Kisshun, I reject!" Two tiny spirits flew from her pins and surrounded Grimmjow's shoulder, engulfing it in yellow light. Almost instantly, bone started to form, muscle over that, skin over that until his entire arm was repaired. When it was completed, the spirits flew back to her hair pins.

Grimmjow grinned as he tested out his new arm. "Alright!" He looked at his arm and was happy to see even his tattoo was restored. "If you will excuse me, I have someone to kill," he said as he jumped around in a fighting stance.

"Luppi?" Gin asked.

"Then you are challenging him," Aizen said as he motioned for Ulquiorra to open the door. As soon as he stepped aside, Grimmjow impaled Luppi as he entered the room. His new arm sliced through Luppi's midsection. Blood splattered and hit Orihime who screamed. He never saw it coming.

"I am resuming my title as the sexta," Grimmjow said as he pulled his arm out. Luppi fell to the floor. Grimmjow looked at Orihime, "Don't bother healing that."

Orihime was shocked into silence. Her body shook with fear.

"Ulquiorra, Orihime will be in your care," Aizen said. "Calm her down and take her to her room." Ulquiorra looked at Rukia and hesitated.

He bowed and led Orihime out of the throne room.

"It seems he is becoming attached to you," Gin said as he leaned over and whispered into Rukia's ear. She sat with her back straight, her hands in her lap. "Did you know he spent the entire time you were gone looking for you? I've never seen him so out of character. He brought Orihime to us as you directed and let us see what happened. After that, he went back to look for you. He found your Zanpaktou and wouldn't let anyone touch it." He stood. "Grimmjow, take Zero to Granz. She should be checked out."

"No." Rukia said.

"Now Zero, it's not like you to defy one of my orders," Gin said surprised. Grimmjow looked on with interest.

Rukia stared at the floor. Aizen turned to her and placed his hand under her chin. He turned her head so that her eyes met his.

"What happened?" he asked. When she still did not respond, he commanded softly, "Hanashi, Zero."

"I challenge Granz," she said softly. Grimmjow smirked. He wouldn't mind joining her in that venture. Her eyes darkened as the rage flowed through her. Her speech became jumbled which only added more frustration to her agitated state. "Too much pain…could not function." Her eyes remained locked with Aizen's. "Captured. Too much confusion, wrong treatment," her voice was cold and sharp. "Aizen-sama's creations…helped me…ordered to kill…cannot hurt, Aizen-sama's…," she shook her head violently. "Kill Granz!" She stood and took a defensive position.

Without missing a beat, Aizen stood and placed his hand on her head. "Shhhh," Aizen crooned as he stroked her hair and calmed her down. He slid his hand down and let his thumb caress her jaw. "Indeed, I have found his attentions have been directed elsewhere lately and that is not acceptable. However, I cannot allow you to challenge him just yet as there is another project I need him for. When the time comes, he will be yours to kill."

Grimmjow huffed. He really wouldn't have minded if she took that freak out now.

Aizen leaned forward and kissed her forehead once more. "Gin will be taking care of your treatments from now on."

"Hai," she said softly; the anger draining out of her.

"Grimmjow, take her to my lab," Gin said with a smirk. "I will be there shortly."

Rukia bowed down to Aizen before leaving. As they left the room Aizen's gaze never left the door. "Things could not have gone better if I had planned it myself."

"You mean you didn't?"

Aizen laughed.


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: Happy summer vacation everyone! I've been guilty of working on another project… Shame on me, I know… I have not forgotten about OTWTA… I lost my notes on it I made during the move last year and have recently started reworking the plot. There will be an update on it soon…**

**Thank you for your reviews, alerts and your time in reading. I am honored and I will thank you even if you find this one turns out to be "annoying junk" like Dreamscape…**

**And if anyone wants to draw an image for this story... That would be waaay cool since I can't draw myself out of a paper bag... (I see we can add images as a cover for the stories now - cool addition!)  
><strong>

* * *

><p>Chapter 12<p>

Ulquiorra led Orihime up a flight of stairs that led to the chamber cells Aizen wanted her locked in.

"Aizen got you a new plaything, I see." Nnoitora said grinning as he came around the corner. He leaned in to touch her when Ulquiorra pushed her out of the way. He positioned himself between them. "And you're defensive already. Impressive for one who cares about nothing."

"What do you want?"

Nnoitora's eyes reluctantly left Orihime's chest. "Just looking for some fun. Seeing as how you have something new to play with, you wouldn't mind if I went after the other, would you? There's got to be something in that small package worth while."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh come on. Everyone noticed the change in you when she finished transforming. From the moment you saw her in the arena."

Ulquiorra frowned.

"What if I went after her?"

"Zero will not give you the time of day."

He laughed. "Maybe, maybe not… but if I asked Aizen for a key to her cell I can change that. What do you think? I hear her brain is all fucked up anyway. It's not like she would remember anything if I take her to Granz afterwards."

Ulquiorra reached his hand out and grabbed Nnoitora by his throat. Orihime let out a yelp as she was pushed back towards the wall, away from them. Silently they stared each other down.

"You are not as indestructible as you think. If you touch Zero and she does not kill you, I will." He let go and took Orihime's hand in his and continued up the stairs. He heard Nnoitora's laughter follow.

He jammed the key into the lock, turned and threw open the door. It crashed outside with a loud bang that echoed down the stairwell and hallway. Orihime jumped. She took a few steps into the cell and put her hands together against her chest. She had so many questions. Since she was taken they had basically ignored her. A female Arrancar with bone across her mouth gave her a change of clothes, a wash basin and she had returned to bring food, but today was the first time she had seen Aizen or had someone to really talk to. She didn't want him to leave. She turned to him, finding her voice. "Will Kuchiki-san be ok?" When he didn't answer she frowned. "That guy we just met… He isn't going to hurt…her?"

She saw anger flash in his eyes albeit briefly. "He will not hurt her. Zero is quite capable of killing him."

Her eyes were round as saucers. "Oh." She looked at him, her eyes lingering on the hole in his neck and thought of her brother. "Does…does it hurt?"

"No."

"I don't know if my powers can fix Kuchiki-san," she said as she turned towards the window.

"Fixing her is not why we brought you here."

"Then why? Why did you bring me here?"

Ulquiorra took a step back and closed the door.

"Please! Please tell me! Talk to me! Just don't…" he could hear her start to cry, "don't leave me here alone."

* * *

><p>"<em>Will you help me?" asked a soft voice in the dark.<em>

_Toshiro stood, trying to get his bearings. Everything was dark. He didn't know where he was._

"_Please," the voice said again._

_Toshiro tried to find where the voice came from. "Where are you?"_

"_Help me."_

"_How can I find you?" He put his hands out in front of him and stumbled a few steps; too dark to see, too dark to move._

"_I needed you…"_

"_I can't find you!"_

_Toshiro frantically searched the dark, looking for a wall, a door, a blade of grass, anything that would help tell him where he was and where he needed to go._

"_Don't leave me…"_

"_I won't!" he promised the voice. "Just tell me how to get to you!"_

"_It hurts…" _

"_I can't help you if I can't get to you!" he cried desperately._

"_It hurts so much…"_

_Toshiro was ready to pull his hair out in frustration. "Rukia!" He yelled as he realized who the voice belonged to. "Rukiaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"_

Toshiro opened his eyes and saw blurry images. As his vision cleared he was able to make out he was on a futon in Inoue's apartment. He shook his head and sat up. Pain shot through his shoulder as he remembered what happened. He'd lost her. Again.

"Taicho!" Matsumoto ran over to him and placed her hand on his bare chest and gently pushed him back down. "You shouldn't get up yet. Your wounds are – "

"I don't care," he said as he pushed her aside. He sat up and saw he was wearing shorts and his thigh was bandaged. His left arm was taped to his side to lessen the movement of his shoulder. He focused and looked around the apartment. "Where are the others?"

"Training, patrolling, sleeping," she replied.

"Where's Hinamori?"

"She's at the warehouse. We were going to turn her in if you didn't wake up soon."

"Soon?" He asked as his head snapped. "How long was I out?"

"Three days. Renji made a small report to Soul Society, told them we were caught off guard by the numbers of the last attack, but didn't tell them anything about Zero or Momo. We all felt you should decide how to proceed."

Toshiro scowled and nodded. "Kurosaki?"

"Is training and gathering his friends. Kisuke said he should be able to open the gate soon. He's going after the human girl. I have a feeling Renji is going too, but he hasn't told me anything."

Toshiro looked at the nearby chair. His uniform was carefully draped over it. He looked at the kanji symbol for his division. Several minutes went by.

"If he wants to go, I am not going to stop him."

Matsumoto opened her eyes. "What?" Toshiro stood and looked at her.

"I'm going to do what I should have done when they took her."

Matsumoto's heart pounded. "You're going after Zero?"

"Yes."

"Then I'm – "

"No," he watched as her face scrunched up. "There is still a war to prepare for, humans to protect. Ikkaku and Yumichika are still here. I'm putting you in charge until the old man figures out what to do here."

Her eyes widened more.

"You're defying orders!"

"Yes." He said.

"But – "

"I'm bringing her back, she doesn't belong there!"

"She doesn't belong in Soul Society either!" Matsumoto shouted. "You know the order they issued!" She shrank back a little when she saw the look in his eyes.

"I won't let that happen. I will not let her be used as a weapon by either side. Rukia is still in there, a part of Zero and I will do anything and everything I can for her…that includes resigning if need be."

She stared at him, shocked. Tears were in her eyes. Toshiro pulled on his uniform and left the apartment.

* * *

><p>"<em>I'm sorry…"<em>

Rukia opened her eyes. She was in her room, on her bed. She received a treatment from Ichimaru-sama that put her to sleep. She had no idea how long she was out. Time meant nothing.

She tiled her head. No pain.

She sat with her back to the wall and thought about her capture. That first night Ichigo had called her his Nakama.

She frowned. The term was foreign to her. She would have to ask Ulquiorra what it meant.

She stopped.

Her mind was clear. Usually the treatments kept her from thinking about anything.

_Curious._

Was this the Shinigami's doing? Was Aizen-sama aware? Did the treatments not work anymore?

"_Let us help you…"_

"_I'll do everything I can to keep you safe__."_

"_I will protect you."_

"Protect me," she whispered out loud. The sound of her voice shocked her. She sat straighter. Aizen-sama would not be pleased. She would go back under Granz's knife. She didn't want that. She didn't want him touching her. Her fists clenched.

_Ulquiorra._

Rukia stood and looked at her door. They always locked it.

_Prisoner._

She touched the handle. It wouldn't move. She blinked. She never thought about it before; never had a reason to; her mind never clear enough to think this far.

She frowned as she froze the lock. She pushed the door and watched as it opened.

* * *

><p>She made her way down a long flight of stairs and turned the corner. She was familiar with Lord Aizen's throne room, Ichimaru-sama's lab, Granz's lab, the meeting room and, of course, the arena.<p>

_Ulquiorra._

She came to a point where there were three other hallways. Avoiding the ones she knew led to the throne room and the labs, she took the third. After walking for a while, the hallway opened up to a small room and another flight of stairs.

Rukia drew her sword and turned in one fluid motion blocking a hand that was intent on impaling her.

_Wonderweiss._

"Ehhhh…?"

Rukia backed away and cocked her head. He lifted his hand, pointed it at her and came at her again. Rukia grabbed it and spun him around and threw him into the wall.

He smiled as his head hit the white brick behind him. In an instant, he again lifted his hand and pointed it at her. She watched as it glowed bright pink.

_Bala._

"Ahhhhhhh…" he breathed.

Rukia threw her hands in front of her and erected a thick wall of snow, ice and reiatsu, blocking the blast. He ran forward, breaking through the barrier and lunged at her. He grabbed her neck and squeezed. Rukia grabbed his arm and twisted, the motion separated his fingers from her neck. His other hand latched onto her jacket. He charged another bala.

She pulled on his arm that was attached to her jacked, tearing the material, and pushed him away. He brought his arm up as he stumbled backwards. Rukia spun and kicked his midsection, throwing him back into the wall. She threw shards of ice at him and pinning him in place.

Sword drawn, she narrowed her eyes and pointed it at his neck.

He smiled.

"He is magnificent, isn't he?" Tosen said as he reached the bottom of the stairs and entered the room. Rukia didn't move, her eyes glued on Wonderweiss who was now looking at the new comer, slightly drooling. "He is perfection. While I would love to stay here and watch him destroy you, Zero, we have things to do."

"Fukusuru, Zero," Aizen said as he appeared behind Tosen.

Her eyes glazed as she returned her sword to her hip and took a step away from the wall. Aizen stopped in front of her and cupped her chin in his hand. "Zero," he whispered. Her eyes met his. He placed his lips on her forehead before stepping away. "It is time I put in motion part of my plan. While I originally included you in it, I find that you would be better off staying here."

Rukia watched as he ascended the stairs with Wonderweiss in tow. The corners of her mouth fell as she realized he was leaving Hueco Mundo and was taking the idiot with him. Not her.

_Why?_

She gasped. She wasn't allowed to question Lord Aizen, not even in thought. Where was this coming from?

The Shinigami…?

"Bah!" she said in frustration. She continued down the hall to continue her search for Ulquiorra.

* * *

><p>Toshiro descended the ladder and out of habit, he looked to the area where Rukia was kept. Momo was now in her place. His jaw tightened as his muscles clenched in anger. After a quick search he found who he was looking for.<p>

"Kurosaki…"

Ichigo looked up and saw the small Taicho come forward in full uniform. His eyebrow rose. Official capacity?

"Feeling better?"

Ignoring him Toshiro said, "Matsumoto tells me Urahara will get the gate open soon."

"Yeah."

"I'm coming."

"What?"

"I'm going to bring Zero back." Ichigo nodded. Toshiro looked over to where Momo was kneeling on the futon, her hands between her knees.

"What are you going to do about her? It's not like you can send her back to Soul Society without them knowing about Zero."

"We can keep her here until you get back," Shinji offered. Toshiro thought.

"No," he said. "This is my mission, my problem. I'm going to have Ikkaku take her back."

"And ignore the no travel order?" Shinji said as he crossed his arms against his chest.

"She can't stay here."

"You know they'll come for you," Ichigo stated.

"Which is why I'll make sure Ikkaku takes her after we leave. Once we're over there, there's not much they can do. At least, not until we get back."

"And by that time we'll all have our hands full with Aizen," Ichigo said. "Ok."

"HEY Ichigo!" Lisa yelled from the top of the stairs. "Urahara sent a message…He's ready!" Toshiro looked at him. He took a breath.

"Let's go."

* * *

><p>Rukia watched as Ulquiorra emerged from the human girl's cell. He turned to her and cocked his head. "You are not in your room," he stated flatly. What was she doing here of all places?<p>

"I had to…find you. Things are different."

"How?" He looked at her jacket and frowned. Nnoitora? "What happened?"

"I am…confused." She looked at him, not sure how to proceed. She shook her head. "Lord Aizen is leaving."

"Yes."

"We are left behind?"

"I am here to watch over the human and Los Noches. There are humans who have come for her."

"We protect her?"

"I am in charge of her and I do not require your help. What happened to your jacket?"

"Wonderweiss. Aizen-sama and Tosen-sama took him with them."

"They just left you wandering the halls?" This was interesting. She was supposed to remain in her room until she was needed. He looked her over and didn't find anything else out of place. "Return to your room." Rukia looked at him as her eyebrows drew together. She started to doubt her reasoning for wanting to see him. He noticed her hesitation and knew Lord Aizen hadn't stripped her mind again. She was starting to think on her own.

This was a dangerous thing. With Lord Aizen and the others leaving to the human world soon, that left Granz in charge of her if something were to happen. He did not want Granz touching her. He was told not to take the threat of the humans coming lightly but did not want Zero involved.

"Return to your room, Zero." He said again.

She didn't understand. "I am not needed?"

"I do not require your help," he repeated firmly. He was close to using a command but watched as she concentrated. Her eyes were unfocused.

"What am I?" It was Ulquiorra's turn to become confused. "I am Nakama? I am prisoner?"

"Zero…"

"What am I?" she cried out, frustrated.

This was bad. He had received the message that the humans had reached their location and were engaged with the lesser Arrancars. This was not the time for Zero to have a mental breakdown. He held his hand out to her and was surprised she shrunk back.

"Zero…"

There was a crash from down the hall. "Guard the door," he ordered her as he left to go back down the hall.

Rukia stood outside the cell door more confused than when she had left her room. Aizen-sama was taking the idiot. She was not needed. Ulquiorra was in charge of the human. He told her she was not needed. She shook her head.

Sounds of fighting came from the far end of the hall and down the stairs. Ulquiorra was fighting.

Who?

"Humans have come for you," she whispered.

"Kuchiki-san? Is that you?"

Rukia thought back to her first encounter in the human world. Inoue Orihime. The red head who put herself in front of Ichigo, protecting him.

_Human._

_Ichigo?_

"Who is here, human? Who has come for you?"

"Kuchiki-san?"

"Who has come?"

"I…I don't know."

"You lie!" Rukia placed her hand over the doorknob and froze it. As it fell to the ground the door swung open. Rukia looked at the human woman who was now dressed in an Arrancar uniform.

_She belongs to Aizen-sama._ She shook her head and grabbed the woman's hand. "Who is here for you?"

"K-Kurosaki-kun…But – "

"Come," Rukia tugged on her hand and led her down the hallway. When they reached the top of the stairs they both looked at the chaos below. Ulquiorra and Ichigo were fighting. A small green form was curled up safely in a corner of the room.

Rukia stood at the top of the stairs and released her reiatsu. Immediately the temperature dropped. Ulquiorra was buried under what used to be a pillar. Ichigo was bloody, panting and almost dead.

"Kurosaki-kun!" Inoue yelled as she started towards him. Rukia held onto her. Inoue stopped and looked at her. "Please, I need to help him. I can heal him." Rukia looked to Ulquiorra who was still buried.

"Kuchiki-san, please!"

"Zero!" Ichigo said as he tried to sit up. "Zero, you're ok." Rukia released the woman's hand and watched as she ran over to him and erected the orange shield. The same one Rukia had seen her do with Grimmjow's arm.

_I will protect you._

Rukia shook her head and went to the pillar. She pulled Ulquiorra up out of the rubble. As he opened his green eyes he narrowed them.

"Why is she out?"

"Ichigo came for her. She does not belong here."

"She belongs to Lord Aizen."

"Why?"

"Because that is his will, Zero. We are here to serve him."

"He does not wish for me to serve him. He has that fool, I am not needed." She stood and backed away. "Not needed with him...not needed with you…"

"You are needed with me!" A cero blast came out of nowhere and blew the room apart. Everyone was thrown in separate directions.

Out of the dust and debris, Grimmjow walked in and smiled at Orihime. He leaned down, picked her up and slung her over his shoulder. "I'm gonna need you to fix this one so I can finish killing him," he said as he looked at Ichigo who was trying to stand. "If you want her, come find me," he said as he took off.

"Nel!" Ichigo said as he dug his small companion out from a small stack of rocks she was hiding behind. With her safe he scanned the area looking for Zero, but her and Ulquiorra were gone. "Come on, we need to find Grimmjow!"


	13. Chapter 13

**AN: Sorry for taking so long… A lot of personal issues and life getting in the way – but here is another installment and I hope to get back to posting more regularly soon!**

**Some have suggested making this Ulqui/Ruki or Ichi/Ruki… you have not gone unnoticed and I have considered it, but that's really not where the story is going. Although, I don't think you'll be disappointed. Maybe you will… I don't know… **

**Anyway – on with it… Thank you so very much for your reviews, your alerts and your time… I am, as always, honored.**

* * *

><p>Chapter 13<p>

Toshiro watched as one of Aaroniero's heads rolled around on the frozen ground. The other, split in two. He cleaned off Hyorinmaru before sealing his Shikai. Promises of no more pain, it had spouted before dying, imploring Aizen to save it.

"Che," he said as he looked down at the heads. "Aizen is not interested in saving you. He only used you to get what he wants." Turning towards the door where he came in, he glanced around the frozen room. As he exited, he closed his eyes and concentrated. He quickly pinpointed Abarai's location and knew Ichigo was fighting. He opened them as he zeroed in on the one he was looking for. In a flash, he was gone.

* * *

><p>In the midst of the cero blast, Ulquiorra used Sonido, grabbed Rukia and took her down the hall to another, safer room. As he set her down he looked at her. His conversations with the human about bonds, friends and "heart" confused him. Arrancars ran on instinct. He ran on facts. It didn't exist if he could not see it. Yet when he looked at Zero a part of his mind became irrational. The fact he didn't want Granz to touch her, the way he had this need to find and hold onto her Zanpaktou when she was lost to them, the urgency of finding her and the need to know what happened to her before she went to see Lord Aizen. Feelings were not rational. They didn't exist. Did they?<p>

"Ulquiorra…" She looked up at him. He should have saved his charge…What was he thinking?

"You are bleeding," he said as he wiped blood from her forehead. Her hair was dotted with sharp pieces of glass. He started to pull a few shards out. She gripped his hand and looked at him.

"I am ok."

"Come, we must retrieve the human for Lord Aizen."

"I am not needed," she said as she looked towards where the blast had come from. "You are more powerful in _that_ form."

"Zero…" he said as he looked at where she was still holding his hand.

"I am not ok. My head…too many thoughts that are not allowed." Her guard down, she allowed Ulquiorra to see her confusion. "Ichimaru-sama…he didn't…he didn't…"

"Cleanse your mind," he finished for her.

"I must see Granz."

"He caused you to get captured!"

"The idiot goes with Lord Aizen!" Rukia huffed and looked away. "I am…defective."

Ulquiorra's eyes widened a bit before taking a step towards her. "The Shinigami have confused you. Kurosaki is confusing you. Do you think Lord Aizen left you because he didn't think you're strong enough? Do you think these thoughts in your head make you weak?"

"Wonderweiss has no thoughts. He is perfection."

Ulquiorra closed his eyes and received Aaroniero's last transmission as he died. The Shinigami were coming. He had to get the woman. With her healing abilities maybe she could help Zero.

"You are strong, Zero. Granz has taken on more than he can handle. Capture them and wait for me. Do not let him do any kind of procedure on you until I am there. Do you understand? I will retrieve the woman and bring her. I believe she will be of better use to you than Granz." Rukia looked at him and gave a small nod. "Go through his lab to the door on the other side. It will lead you to his secondary lab. You will find them outside."

"Hai," she said as she looked at him. He put his hand on her shoulder.

"I want them captured, but do not hold back. I will see you shortly." With that, he was gone.

* * *

><p>As she opened the door to the lab, her mind unlocked memories of the many times she had been in there before. The room was dark and cold. She stopped and looked at the familiar table in the middle of the room. Rukia closed her eyes and could almost hear herself scream, but the voice was not her own. It was…hollow.<p>

Her hand reached out and touched one of the restraining straps. She remembered Lord Aizen staring down at her. It was one of her first memories…

"_Is it done?"_

"_Yes, although I don't understand why you just couldn't use your Zanpaktou."_

"_The Hogyoku is immune," he waved his hand in front of her eyes. "What did you do?"_

"_I was able to isolate her memories with this," Granz said as he picked up a small device that looked similar to a screwdriver. "I severed the connections and removed part of her brain. Everything about her life as a Shinigami is gone."_

"_She is mine now."_

"_Yes, Lord Aizen."_

_Aizen put his hand on the side of Rukia's face as he marveled over her blank stare; her fear and her fire temporarily gone._

"_Now we will make you perfect," he said as he held out a small blue orb._

She blinked as she removed her hand. Rukia turned and looked at the door. The one Lord Aizen had come through many times throughout her ordeal.

"_I know you are in pain. Trust in me, serve me and I will make it go away."_

Her life was stolen, her memories stolen, everything she ever was, stolen. If the Shinigami were to be believed, she was taken from Soul Society and turned into…into what she was now. Her hand flitted to the hole in her chest. The tips of her fingers ran across the bone.

What was she?

"_Welcome to your rebirth, Zero," Aizen said as he extended his hand to her. She looked at him with wide blank eyes. He was tall and powerful. He was her Lord. He bent over her and kissed her forehead. "You are my prized possession. You will take down those who have wronged me and help me achieve my goal."_

"Posession," Rukia said before she gasped at her own voice. Shinigami, Zanpaktou Spirit, Hollow. She was all three. Ripped apart and thrown back together, molded into one consciousness, one being. She looked at the shelf near the bed that contained many jars and syringes. The desk in front had several knives, saws and scalpels. Grant's tools.

"_How does that feel?" Granz asked as she screamed. He took a scalpel off the table and held it in front of her eyes. She was strapped to the table, a band keeping her head in place. She screamed again as he cut into her skull, exposing her brain._

Rukia pushed the table away, knocking it over and turned towards the second set of doors.

"_You are nothing! You lay there all smug in knowing you are his favorite, but that will change. He will toss you aside like the Shinigami." He took a breath, adjusted his glasses and started to grin. "The Shinigami didn't care that we took you from them. No one came, no one missed you. You were as worthless to them as you will be here. Lord Aizen will soon know how flawed you are. He will create perfection and toss you aside. And then," Granz said as he laughed, "then I will destroy you!"_

Rukia scowled.

"_You are nothing."_

"No!" she stated firmly. She thrust her hands in front of her and watched as the shelves became frozen. Vials, beakers, jars and their contents froze solid before she made a fist and threw shards at them, breaking them.

She drew her Zanpaktou and felt the "hum" as it sliced the table in two. She turned, threw her hand out and froze the next set of shelves. It didn't take long before the entire lab was destroyed. With barely a pant, Rukia kicked open the next set of doors. This was Granz's second lab Ulquiorra spoke of.

Rukia's eyes widened at the sight. Rows of tank like cylinders lined the walls. They stretched to the ceiling and went all the way to the other side of the lab. Various hollows were inside, suspended and unconscious in some sort of liquid. Her stomach instantly churned. A feeling of familiarity overwhelmed her.

Shinigami, Zanpaktou Spirit, Hollow.

Here, here, here! Her insides screamed drawing her closer.

"I was here." Rukia frowned as she walked towards one of the tanks. Slowly, she touched an empty one and looked at the others. She had no conscious memory of ever being in this part of the lab before. Yet everything was familiar.

Her head cracked with pain as she fell to her knees.

Images of her being strapped to the table filtered through her mind. Lord Aizen smiling at her while she screamed. Looking on with passive interest as Granz tore through her mind, body and spirit, ripping it apart and thrusting back together. Forcing a new consciousness to take hold, permanently merging with the two already there.

Rukia held onto her head as she remembered the pain and agony she was forced to endure. She clutched at her chest, near the hole as memories of her "birth" surfaced.

* * *

><p>Toshiro stopped in his tracks as he felt the presence of other Shinigami. "What are they doing here?" he wondered out loud. Abarai was closest; he decided to head there and regroup.<p>

He flash stepped down a long hallway and went through the door at the other end. He carefully poked his head inside and was stunned to find the room frozen and destroyed.

It was then he felt her reiatsu and hurried to the other side of the room, through the next set of doors and stopped. "Zero!" He called out. He resisted the impulse to rush by her side. She was crouched down, one hand on her head, the other over her hollow hole. Her eyes were closed. His fingers twitched and his arms ached with wanting to touch her. His head played out several scenarios all of them ending in them fighting. Finally, he damned them all.

"Zero?" he asked as he took a step towards her. He stopped when she spoke, the tone halting him in place.

"Shinigami," she said with distain. She stood and turned to face him. Her violet eyes were clear and sharp.

"Hitsugaya Toshiro. You do remember me, don't you?" He asked as he took a small step towards her. "We tried to help you."

"Why?" she said as she moved her hand to the hilt of her Zanpaktou. "Why did you help me?"

"Because I wasn't going to fail you again," he replied softly. "I want to help you; I want to protect you so that no one can hurt you or use you ever again."

"Hmph," she breathed as she looked towards the tanks. She lifted her hand and let her fingers gently glide over the surface of the tank closest to her. "Rukia," she whispered. The name was both familiar and foreign to her and felt odd on her tongue. "Rukia died…here," Zero gestured to the destroyed part of the lab. "No one saved her." Toshiro's heart sank into his stomach as the truth slammed home. Rukia took a step forward as she tightened her hand around the hilt of her Zanpaktou, blue reiatsu emanated through her fingers. "No one came."

"There were orders put in place after her capture. We were all forbidden to come for her," he said and knew it sounded as lame as he thought it did. "It wasn't because we didn't want too. She was loved by many. She was - "

"Ichigo's Nakama," she mocked.

"Mine as well!" Toshiro burst out. His hand was outstretched towards her, wanting to connect.

"Means nothing," Rukia said as she pulled out her Zanpaktou. She held it in front of her and looked at it. Its pure white blade and hilt were bright against the dingy lab. "No one came for Rukia."

"Kurosaki didn't know you were taken. If he did…" He jammed his hand through his hair. "If he did he would have done what I should have and broke through hell to get you back. To save you before they could…Before they did…that to you." He closed his eyes. This was truly the lowest point in his life. If she chose to kill him he didn't think he would stop her.

Rukia looked at him and tried to comprehend her thoughts. She instantly decided she liked it better when she didn't have them. They were confusing, misleading and distracting.

"Take the woman and go," Rukia said as she dropped her hand with the sword. She turned and started walking towards the back set of doors to find Granz. Ulquiorra will make sure this ends.

"I didn't come for her. I came for you." Toshiro willed his feet to move, "I failed Rukia by not doing what I should have. I will not fail you. I came to bring you home."

Rukia stopped and let out a small laugh. "I do not need saving, Shinigami," she sneered. She turned her head and gave him a backwards glance. "My home is here."

Toshiro wanted to tell her this wasn't her home, wanted to tell her that her home was with him, but… She was right. She wasn't just a Shinigami anymore. She was more than that and as much as he hated Aizen for everything he has done, this was Zero's home. He was her 'creator'. He shook his head.

"Aizen doesn't care about you! He only wants to use you. He's waging this war so he can destroy Soul Society, the human world…even here!" Rukia stopped. "He doesn't care who he uses or what he destroys to get what he wants!"

Zero turned and looked at him.

"He wants the king's key and he's willing to sacrifice thousands of human lives to do it!" Toshiro forced himself to take a breath, to calm himself. "Your job as a Shinigami was to protect human lives and you've saved many! Time and again, Zero, because of you."

"No longer Shinigami."

"You're wrong. A part of you will always be Shinigami. It is your duty to guard and protect."

Rukia shook her head. "Irrelevant. Shinigami do not want me. I serve Lord Aizen." She shook her head again, trying desperately to clear her thoughts away.

"You are wanted, Zero. I came here for you. I want to protect you."

"Protect me," she whispered. Her mind drifted back to when she was captured. As she floated in and out of consciousness she heard his voice. She heard his promises, of his time with Rukia, of the things he'd done wrong. She blinked and looked at him. "You," she said. "You cannot help me." She whipped around and walked out the door.

"Zero!"


	14. Chapter 14

**AN: It's nice getting back in the swing of things… Again – based loosely on the canon timeline, but you will see drastic changes in people, places, events… Sorry I'm taking so long with this… Thank you for your continued patience **

* * *

><p>Chapter 14<p>

The light hit her eyes and made her squint. Granz in _that_ form was standing absolutely still near a group of rocks. A female Shinigami was on the ground looking at her hands. What intrigued Zero was the other Shinigami. The one with the face paint, outrageous hair and a white robe like the one Toshiro wore. He was grinning with smug satisfaction. She looked at Granz once more. Upon further inspection, she could see there was something wrong. A small thin trail of blood was slowly dripping from his chest. He stood as if in the middle of speaking, how that bastard loved to talk, yet he was frozen in time.

Frozen.

She blinked as her damaged mind wrapped around what she was seeing. How was that possible? Was he dead?

"Oh? And who do we have here?" Mayuri asked. She narrowed her eyes and frowned as she felt his eyes on her, looking her over like a specimen to be dissected. Like how Granz used to look at her. Her hand rested on the end of her Zanpaktou. The dull hum felt good on her hand. As she looked at the blue haired man she could almost feel him salivate.

Disgusting.

"How?" she asked and watched as the Shinigami pulled his gaze from the hole in her chest to her eyes. He exposed most of his teeth in a wide smile. An image of Nnoitora floated through her mind. He had that same cocky, toothy grin.

"That?" he replied as he gave a small nod towards Granz, "I'm finding your new friends to be fascinating although much to be desired, Kuchiki," Mayuri said as he laughed. "Just gave him time to think about a few things before his actual death." Zero looked at him, puzzled. His gaze returned to the hole in her chest, "It was supposed to be a simple procedure to turn you into one of them, but something went wrong. You didn't turn out like the others. Come here; let me get a better look at you."

Zero stayed where she was and didn't reply.

"I see. You would rather stay as you are then?" he asked as his smile grew impossibly wider. "I can fix what Aizen did to you. I believe I can even make you a Shinigami again."

"I am not broken," she stated as her mind started to scream seemingly in protest to her denial. Stray thoughts flew from every direction as a steady throb of pain settled in the center of her brain. Her cold reiatsu flooded the area. She was supposed to be the one to give Granz his final death. Lord Aizen promised her. To top it off this…this _Shinigami _dared to insinuate that Lord Aizen somehow –

Zero gasped as an unsettling realization came over her.

_Something went wrong._

Surely Lord Aizen didn't create failures? She was supposed to be perfection…

But she wasn't.

Wonderweiss was perfection. Lord Aizen took Wonderweiss to the living world on his mission. She was due another treatment, but wasn't given one. She was left behind to deal with these…imperfections.

Mayuri threw his head back and laughed. The door to the lab opened and Toshiro emerged. "Ah, there you are." Mayuri said as he turned away from Zero, "The old man is quite mad at you."

Toshiro narrowed his eyes. "What are you and the others doing here?" he demanded.

"We were ordered to assist and bring Kurosaki and the human girl back to the living world. Abarai and the Quincy went to find the girl.

"Nemu, grab Kuchiki, I want to check out what other goodies might be in the lab," Kurotsuchi said as he looked towards the female who was still on the ground. After a few minutes, Nemu still had not moved. She was still recovering from her own ordeal from Granz. He frowned and said, "Tsk, seems like I have to do everything around here." He reached out his hand towards Zero. "Come here, girl."

"No!" Toshiro said as he positioned himself in-between the two.

"My, my. Are we helping the enemy now?"

"She isn't the enemy!"

"She is an Arrancar, Espada even, therefore the enemy."

"I know what she is, but she is not the enemy," Toshiro insisted. He glanced back at Zero, her expression was blank, giving no indication that she was a threat.

"You're delusional, Hitsugaya." His eyes roamed again over Zero's small frame. "She is every bit the enemy. I don't think there's anything left of Kuchiki. Of course, I'd be willing to take her back to my lab and find out. I might even be able to reverse what they've done." Toshiro looked at him skeptically. "Does that interest you? After all, that is why you're here, isn't it?"

"I came here with Kurosaki to– "

"You came here to bring her back. In order for her to avoid being destroyed by the rest of Soul Society you will need me. Make her come to me."

Toshiro's face flushed with anger. Enough has been done to her already. "You will not lay a hand on her."

"You dare to give me orders?"

A cold blast of ice and snow rushed past Toshiro's head narrowly missing him. As he took a step to steady himself, his jaw opened as he saw that Zero had encased Kurotsuchi and Nemu in a block of ice.

"Won't hold," she said flatly barely giving him a glance. Her gaze turned to some point in the distance. With the chatter silenced she could concentrate. The Espada shared a connection that she was never a part of. Ichimaru-sama told her he didn't want their imperfections to cloud her mind. She was going to be different. Wonderweiss wasn't a part of that connection either. She frowned. Ulquiorra should have been here with the woman by now. She was told to capture the Shinigami and wait, but for how long? "Not coming," she whispered. The pain in her head was steadily getting worse. She couldn't wait any longer. She had to find Ulquiorra.

"Who?" Toshiro asked. He didn't have time to think about why she chose not to freeze him with the others. "Zero?" Without so much as a glance, she used Sonido and was gone. True to her word, the ice cracked and broke apart. Kurotsuchi was quite perturbed.

"Not the enemy? NOT the ENEMY? The next time I see that girl I will liquefy her in a – "

Toshiro spun in Kurotsuchi's direction and narrowed his eyes. "Enough!"

* * *

><p>The pounding in her head increased; little shards of pain embedded themselves deep within her brain like broken glass. Zero stumbled and fell to the ground near several towers. The soft sand was cool on her cheek. She grunted as she rolled onto her back as she waited for the pain to pass. She wasn't sure where she was or how to get back to her room, the lab, anywhere that was familiar.<p>

_Something went wrong…_

Pushing the thought out of her head she closed her mind and stayed perfectly still. She was forbidden to have thoughts. Thoughts were a weakness.

Weren't they?

_Something went wrong…_

Wonderweiss didn't need treatments. He didn't need his mind stripped. He didn't have to go through the pain she did.

_Something went wrong…_

To even consider what the Shinigami said might be true meant that Lord Aizen was flawed. But that was impossible. He told her so many things. How important she was to his plan. That he would not be able to complete it without her.

Her mind flooded with thoughts. She closed her eyes and gave in to them, letting her mind wander. They seemed to concentrate on the events following Wonderweiss' attack on her. Tosen-sama knew what was going on, yet let it happen. Lord Aizen didn't seem too concerned about it either.

She didn't understand. Why was she left behind? She was supposed to go with him, help him achieve his goal. Help him defeat the Shinigami. It was the Shinigami that turned on Lord Aizen, forced him to leave when all he wanted to do was help them, enhance them and make them better than they were. They cast him out of their precious Soul Society, banning him from returning.

_I can fix what Aizen did to you…_

Her body grew rigid as another stab of pain went through her head. Her back arched as she rolled over onto her side. She felt the cool sand on her face once again. She ignored the Shinigami's words as they tried to taunt her. She already knew she was defective.

_Do you think these thoughts in your head make you weak? _Ulquiorra's voice filtered through like cool water. _You are strong, Zero…_

"I am…nothing…" she whispered, not finishing her thought before it changed to something else and before she could get a grasp on it, it was gone and another was in its place.

_I hate that you'll never remember what we had. I hate what Aizen has done to you and I hate that I let it all happen. I'm sorry, Rukia._

"I…was…Shi...ni...ga…mi."

"_I will kill Aizen for what he has done to you, Zero."_

"Na…ka…ma."

"_I created you to help me, Zero. I can't do this without you. Follow me and I will take the pain away."_

"Aizen-sa…ma."

"_He can tell you he created you all he wants, I did all the work. I am the one who will keep you alive. Without me you are nothing."_

"Zero."

_I will protect you_.

"Stop," Zero whispered. She was drowning in thoughts and questions. As her mind began to heal and as connections reestablished themselves, she was left to deal with the overload.

Then it went dark.

* * *

><p>"Zero?"<p>

The voice came from somewhere far away. Muffled and distorted. Her eyelids were heavy and she was unable to open them. She tried to move but found her limbs were too heavy.

"Zero!"

The voice was closer, but still unfamiliar. An odd sensation came over her. She felt like she was floating. She tried to move again, but after failing she stopped fighting it. Granz used to keep her in a drugged state, especially before performing any procedures. The pain in her head was gone and the floating sensation was nice.

"Zero! Can you hear me?"

That voice again. Closer this time. Who was that? Granz? No… that's not right. Granz was dead. That blue haired Shinigami killed him. Maybe Aizen-sama returned for her; returned to fix her and make her right.

"Zero!"

There were no thoughts, no pain…just the sensation of floating. While training, she was subjected to all different forms of hollows. Some of them had the gift of flight and were harder to catch. But catch and kill them she did. She would watch in fascination as their bodies no longer hung in the air and crashed down to the ground, frozen and broken, covered in snow and ice.

Floating…

"Hold on, Zero," She should know that voice, she had heard it before. A wave of exhaustion flooded through her mind as the darkness came for her once again.

* * *

><p>He, himself, was battered and bruised from his last fight. Who would have thought he would need saving? As bad as that made him feel, he was glad Kenpachi was there. That freed him to look for Inoue and the others. He shifted the weight in his arms so that he could cover his eyes. He could make out some figures in the distance.<p>

Ishida and Inoue.

He grinned and sighed. "Hold on, Zero…" He looked down at the woman he carried. As he left Kenpachi to make his way back to the cells, he found her. She was alone and unconscious lying on the ground. A sense of panic overwhelmed him as he first thought she was dead; killed by another Espada or worse, one of the Taichos that were sent to help.

Slight relief ran through him as he felt her breathe. Yet he couldn't wake her.

"Inoue!" He called as he ran to them. "Inoue… Can you help her?" Ichigo pleaded as he set Zero's body down on the ground in front of his friend. Inoue and Ishida both turned to look at him. Inoue looked at Ichigo's injuries and gasped. She was taken by Yammi while he was fighting Nnoitora and was about to face her own death by the hands of two female Arrancars when Ishida was able to rescue her.

"Kurosaki! I don't think Orihime-san has the strength for that right now. She just – "

"It-it's ok, Ishida-kun." She said as she gave him a shy smile. "But shouldn't I heal you first, Kurosaki-kun? You're hurt…"

"I'm fine, Inoue, please… Help Zero." Inoue watched as Ichigo focused his attention on Zero. As she settled herself down on her knees in front of the smaller woman, she inwardly sighed. Rukia was an Arrancar now and still he looks at her that way. She lifted her hands to her hair pins.

"I reject," she said. Ayame and Shuno appeared and erected the familiar orange shield around Zero. The humming noise grew louder.

_BOOM!_

The shield exploded and the spirits were thrown in opposite directions. Inoue gasped as she was knocked over. Ichigo quickly shielded his eyes and braced himself. Ishida did the same, but was knocked over as well.

As the smoke cleared, Ichigo recovered and quickly checked Zero for injuries.

"What happened?" he demanded as he looked at Inoue. Ishida frowned and moved to help Inoue.

"Are you ok?" He asked her as he threw a glare towards Ichigo. "I told you, Kurosaki! Orihime-san doesn't have the strength for this! She's been through a lot!"

Inoue forced herself to look away from Ichigo who was still focused on Zero. She looked at her spirits who were just now shaking their heads, recovering from the blast.

Shuno stood up and flew in front of Inoue's face. "We can't help her."

"What?" Ichigo asked. "What do you mean you can't help her?"

"Do…do you know what happened?" Inoue asked Shuno who shrugged in response.

"Something is blocking us," Ayame said quietly.

"Whatever they did to her, they made sure it couldn't be undone," Ishida said as he looked at Zero. "I can't believe not even Orihime-san's powers can help her."

"Then we'll find something else," Ichigo said with determination.

"To what end?" Ishida asked.

"What?"

"Why not just leave her here? It's obvious she's not going to be a threat to us or anyone else in the state she's in and with Aizen in the living world and Granz dead – "

"Who?"

"Szayel Aporro Granz. Apparently he, along with Gin and Aizen are the ones responsible for turning Kuchiki into what she is now. But he's dead. Don't you see? Since Orihime-san's powers failed and without Aizen or Granz, Kuchiki is as good as dead if we just left her here."

"I'm not going to do that."

"Ichigo, if we bring her back with us, think about what's going to happen. Soul Society wants her dead and probably anyone who helps her! Do you want your new visored friends destroyed over this? By leaving her here – "

"To die?!"

"By leaving her here, think of all the conflict that can be avoided." Ichigo stared hard at Ishida, still not believing his friend could suggest such a thing. He looked at Inoue who was already facing away from them. Her shoulders were quivering.

"No. I will fight them all if I have to! I will make them understand – "

"Understand what? What Ichigo? Understand that Kuchiki is no longer Kuchiki? Wake the hell up! She's an Espada now! Even if we found someone who could heal her do you think they would just let her alone? She's a danger to everyone now!"

"No! I don't believe that!" Ichigo yelled as he jammed his hand through his hair as he looked at Zero on the ground. "I don't believe that," he said quieter.

Inoue, near hysterics, tried to calm herself as she turned towards the men. "I…I don't believe that either," she managed to get out between sobs. If she was honest with herself she did have a glimmer of hope when Ishida suggested they leave Kuchiki here. But she couldn't do that. Kuchiki was her friend. At least, she was when she was Kuchiki.

Ishida threw his hands in the air. "Of course you're going to side with Kurosaki."

"No, it's not that," she sniffed. "Kuchiki-san was the one who let me out of my cell. She asked who came for me and when I told her it was Kurosaki-kun, she…she grabbed my hand and led me to them. She said I didn't belong there. She let me go!" she yelled before breaking down again.

"See?" Ichigo demanded as he turned back towards Ishida. "She's not this evil enemy that everyone wants to make her out to be! She may not be Rukia anymore, but Rukia is still a part of Zero and I will not give up on – UNGH!" His words were cut short by a sword that was now sticking out of his chest.

"You will hand her over to me," Ulquiorra said as he pulled his sword out of Ichigo and kicked him to the ground.

Inoue screamed.


	15. Chapter 15

**AN: Still on a roll… hahaha… Thank you all for being so patient and taking the time to review ****. I do not own anything Bleach although I did used Ishida's words from chapter 352 from the manga…**

* * *

><p>Chapter 15<p>

"She's a danger to everyone now!" Ishida boomed.

"No! I don't believe that!" Ichigo yelled as he jammed his hand through his hair as he looked at Zero on the ground. "I don't believe that," he said quieter.

Inoue, near hysterics, tried to calm herself as she turned towards the men. "I…I don't believe that either," she managed to get out between sobs. If she was honest with herself she did have a glimmer of hope when Ishida suggested they leave Kuchiki here. But she couldn't do that. Kuchiki was her friend. At least, she was when she was Kuchiki.

Ishida threw his hands in the air. "Of course you're going to side with Kurosaki."

"No, it's not that," she sniffed. "Kuchiki-san was the one who let me out of my cell. She asked who came for me and when I told her it was Kurosaki-kun, she…she grabbed my hand and led me to them. She said I didn't belong there. She let me go!" she yelled before breaking down again.

"See?" Ichigo demanded as he turned back towards Ishida. "She's not this evil enemy that everyone wants to make her out to be! She may not be Rukia anymore, but Rukia is still a part of Zero and I will not give up on – UNGH!" His words were cut short by a sword that was now sticking out of his chest.

"You will hand her over to me," Ulquiorra said as he pulled his sword out of Ichigo and kicked him to the ground.

Inoue screamed.

Ishida put himself between Ulquiorra and Inoue and raised his bow arm. "Stay behind me!" he yelled to her. He looked at Ichigo who was trying to get to his hands and knees. A pool of blood was spreading beneath him.

"You will hand her over to me. Now." Ulquiorra said as he looked at the Quincy.

"No." Ishida said with a bit more confidence than he felt. He adjusted his glasses. "If you want her, you will have to go through me!" Ulquiorra looked at him and charged a cero. Ishida fired his bow and moved away from Inoue. If he was going to get blasted, he didn't want her hurt in the process. "Kurosaki! Take Orihime and go! I'll hold him off!"

Ulquiorra released his cero, the brunt narrowly missing Ishida. Sand and rocks blew apart on impact several meters wide. He didn't want to inadvertently hurt what he was trying to retrieve and kept the intensity of the cero to a minimum. Still, dust and debris clouded the area. It's density thick.

"I will not let you take her!" Ishida cried out. Blood dripped from his brow. His vision blurred, his hand was injured from the blast. He could make out Orihime's form a few yards away. She was sitting and huddled against a pillar. She looked to be ok. He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Do you think you can hold onto her?" Ulquiorra asked. Ishida jumped as he didn't see the Espada until he was standing right next to him. He turned but was quickly thrown up against another pillar. He felt the cold fingers of the Espada's hand as they dug into the flesh of his throat. "Do you think you can help her, human?"

"Do you think you can keep her?"

Ulquiorra leveled his emerald eyes at the Quincy. "You have no idea how to help her. If you try, she will kill you."

"What?" Ishida choked out, confused. He blinked and looked at Inoue. He made out another form lying next to her. Slowly his mind made the connection. "You're not talking about Orihime. You're talking about – "

"Zero," Ulquiorra said as he flung Ishida aside. He saw her unconscious form and while his face remained impassive, his mind was on overtime. He was furious. Granz was to blame for this. Always thinking he was better than any of them. And then there was Aizen. He instilled this…weakness in Zero. Limited her and made her dependant on the Hogyoku for survival. He was standing in the shadows when the woman tried to help Zero. He was surprised her powers failed. He walked over to the women. Inoue looked up at him with sad, wet eyes. Ignoring her, he moved to pick up Zero when he felt the tip of a cold metal object at his neck.

"Get away from her," said Ichigo.

"Fool," Ulquiorra said as he straightened himself. He did not move away though.

"You've done enough to her."

"I've done nothing to her."

"Right…" Ichigo said. "I told you to get away from her."

"Why do you want her back? Do you think you can fix her? Restore her to what she once was?"

"I don't know, but we're going to do everything we can to try."

"You are a fool," Ulquiorra said as he shook his head. "There is no turning back for her."

"You don't know that."

"I know more than you think," he said as he turned. He pulled out his Zanpaktou. With a resounding _CLANG_, their swords came together. "Take the woman if you wish, but Zero will stay here." He knew with that statement alone he was defying Aizen's orders, but what else could be done? Shouldn't Zero be a priority? Or has Aizen truly abandoned her like she thought? He spent the better part of his time since then analyzing it. He wanted to believe Aizen created her for their betterment; to win this endless, senseless war with the Shinigami.

He wasn't stupid. He knew from the beginning that Aizen had his own agenda and when he defeated Baraggan, and in essence became the Vasto Lorde of Hueco Mundo, things changed. He used the Hogyoku and created an army of more powerful hollow, the Arrancar. He further honed their skills and created the Espada. Although he was pleased, he was not satisfied.

When "Rukia" was first brought in and tested, Ulquiorra didn't think she stood any chance of surviving the change. She proved him wrong. She not only survived, but she excelled and exceeded everyone's expectations. A few were worried the Shinigami would come for her and then use her against them. Aizen had planned ahead. The commands were already installed, the damage to her brain already done, her dependency on the synthetic Hogyoku material complete. Her fate was sealed. Even if she was taken by the Shinigami, they wouldn't be able to save her. She would die.

To Aizen, she was nothing more than a weapon. But still he was not satisfied.

The plans that included Zero changed when he created Wonderweiss. "The idiot" as Zero called him. Zero was to be a part of the team that tested the living world and gathered more information regarding the humans and the reiatsu they unknowingly had.

Ulquiorra prided himself as being one of Aizen's confidants. A liaison to the rest of the Espada although he was originally ranked at number four. He knew the original plan and although he didn't believe Aizen would succeed, he did think it would cause enough havoc to knock the Shinigami down from their high horse. They were the arrogant ones.

Ulquiorra was bothered by the fact Aizen changed the plan several times without keeping him up to date. Not that Aizen needed his approval, but it certainly would have helped him prepare for the invading Shinigami. And Zero… He spared a glance at her still form. Aizen knew all along Granz screwed up yet he let it happen. He let her get captured. She was nothing more than an expendable pawn; as were they all.

Ichigo pushed with all of his strength. "I'm not leaving without her."

"Then you will die here," Ulquiorra said as he pushed back.

"Kurosaki!" Ishida yelled. "They are the ones who did this to her, maybe they can help her."

"She's not staying here with them!"

"Your arrogance will kill her," Ulquiorra stated as he pushed Ichigo back far enough to break contact. He lifted his hand and charged another Cero.

"Ban-kai!" Ichigo bellowed. Within a whirl of reiatsu, Ichigo stared down his opponent.

"Kuro-saki…kun," Inoue cried softly from her spot. She was joined by Ishida who could only watch as the two men faced off.

* * *

><p>Zero opened her eyes to find she was lying in a small open field surrounded by endless trees. Off to her left was a small hill. She could make out the tops of trees on the other side of it. Everything was covered in snow.<p>

As her mind cleared she jumped to her feet and drew her Zanpaktou in one seamless, fluid motion. She looked in all directions… There was no one else there.

This place was…familiar yet foreign. This was something from _before_ like the tank in Granz's second lab. A part of her knew this place at one time. It was…

"Home," she whispered. Sheathing her Zanpaktou she made her way towards the hill. The snow was several feet deep and was still coming down. She glanced at the sky. The sun was blocked out by thick grey clouds. She absently wondered if it were always like this; dark, cold…desolate.

She reached the foot of the hill and stopped. She hesitated. This was again, familiar. The snow came down harder. She looked towards the trees and watched. They stood tall and silent. The line was thick not allowing even the smallest of light to penetrate their guard. The small field was surrounded by them, protecting the area.

_Protecting her._

Frowning, she started up the hill. She did not need protecting. Lord Aizen protected her. Although, according to the Shinigami, Lord Aizen did everything but protect her. He stole her from her home, stole her memories, and forever changed who she was to suit his own whim. And now…now he abandoned her.

"_Do you think these thoughts make you weak, Zero?" Ulquiorra's voice._

They are confusing. They are not allowed. But…Ulquiorra is allowed thought. Nnoitora is allowed thought. Grimmjow is allowed thought. The others are allowed to think and express their thoughts.

_Why?_

"_You are nothing. That's what Zero means. Everything you are, you are because of me."_

I am...

"_You were Shinigami," Toshiro's voice floated through. "Your job as a Shinigami was to protect human lives and you've saved many!"_

"_You are strong, Zero."_

I…

"_Aizen doesn't care about you! He only wants to use you. He's waging this war so he can destroy Soul Society, the human world…even here! He doesn't care who he uses or what he destroys to get what he wants!"_

It does not matter. Does it?

"_I came for you, Zero. To bring you home."_

Why?

"_No matter what they've done to you, you will always be my Nakama, Zero."_

She reached the top of the hill and was thankful her mind was finally quiet. She scanned the lake and her eyes widened.

Images of Ichigo and Ulquiorra floated across the top layer of the water like a hologram. Ichigo was torn and bloodied. There was a hole in his chest and he was very still. The woman was screaming over him. The other human was by her side, trying to comfort her.

Ulquiorra was in his second released form. One Zero had only heard about from Ichimaru-sama. He too, was torn and bloodied. His limbs were trying to regenerate. She knew he had that power and also knew it was limited. If his internal organs were damaged there wouldn't be anything he could do to save himself.

She watched as a swirl of reiatsu started to form around Ichigo. His mask was reforming, a low growl started to emanate from his chest.

"Hollow," Zero said and watched as the hollow finished taking over Ichigo's body and slowly stood. His mask was fully formed with two horns that extended out. His hair had grown long, down his back. His wounds stopped bleeding and sealed shut.

He turned towards the woman.

"You…I will…protect…you," it said. He raised his sword and turned to Ulquiorra who was still regenerating.

"NO!" shouted Zero although she knew no one could hear her. She touched the water and the image disappeared. "No!" She said again and backed away. Impatiently she waited for the water to settle, hoping the image would return. She looked at the forest.

_Protecting…_

Zero narrowed her eyes as she struggled to find clarity in her new realization. She turned back towards the water. Without another thought, she dove in.

* * *

><p>"Please, Ishida-kun," Orihime pleaded. "Please take me up there. I need to make sure… I need…" she was near to the point of sobbing and losing her voice.<p>

The area where they were was completely destroyed. Ichigo, turned hollow made good on his word and was protecting her. Ulquiorra regenerated enough to continue the fight. At first it seemed like it was an even match. Each firing cero after cero at each other, but while Ichigo's body was healed, Ulquiorra had internal damage that he could not fix.

They took the fight to the top of the dome that covered the area and have been out of sight for several minutes. Inoue was worried for Ichigo. Ishida was worried for Ichigo but also for themselves. What if he didn't know how to regain control? He was quickly going over his options when Inoue made her plea once again.

"Please, Ishida-kun."

Ishida picked up Zero and slung her over his shoulder, vaguely noting how cold she seemed to be. He extended his hand to Inoue.

* * *

><p>Zero opened her eyes once again and looked around her. The woman and human were standing over her but were focused on something else.<p>

The beast roared. Quickly, Zero turned her head and looked to where Ulquiorra was lying on the ground. His legs and arm were severed and were trying to regenerate. A chunk of his torso was missing. Blood was pouring out of his mouth.

Internal damage that could not be repaired.

The hollow was standing above him, his sword ready to deal the final blow. Ishida moved and put this hand on the beast's wrist.

"That's enough…You've won. He may be the enemy, but there's no need to carve up his corpse." The hollow snarled and turned his head. "Can't you hear me Kurosaki? I said stop it! If you do this you won't be human anymore!"

The blade dropped closer to Ulquiorra's throat.

"Kurosaki!" Ishida yelled. With one swift movement, the hollow threw Ishida off of him with his sword already impaled in the human's torso.

"ISHIDA!" Orihime yelled. The hollow turned to her once again. "K-Kurosaki-kun! Please stop!"

"You…" It growled as it raised its hand.

_Protect…protect…protect…protect…_

Zero's mind screamed as she stood and drew her Zanpaktou. The hollow ignored her and turned back to Ulquiorra. A small red ball formed between its horns.

_Protect…protect…protect…protect…_

"Fubuki," Zero whispered. Everything went white.


	16. Chapter 16

**AN: Just for fun and to learn a little history – the Japanese had 24 Fubuki (blizzard) class destroyers in their navy back during the WWI era. It set a new standard around the world. They were bigger, faster and more powerful than any other ship of similar class and stayed that way until the end of WWII in spite of their age. **

**Cool, eh? Yeah, ok… I did a bit of research on hollows and I really couldn't find the answer I was looking for. So, here is where you come into my world and things are going to work the way I want it for the sake of the story… And cause I really liked Ulquiorra… **

**And Zero's release? Yeah… Take it for what it's worth… It's awesome in my head… I wish I could draw…**

* * *

><p>Chapter 16<p>

Zero's mind screamed as she stood and drew her Zanpaktou. The hollow ignored her and turned back to Ulquiorra. A small red ball formed between its horns.

_Protect…protect…protect…protect…_

"Fubuki," Zero whispered. Reiatsu swirled around her as she closed her eyes. The wind picked up and snow started to fall, instantly narrowing everyone's field of vision.

Zero used Sonido and placed herself between the hollow and Ulquiorra. She threw her hand up and sent several reiatsu infused snowballs at the hollow. They connected with his head and chest, forcing him to stumble backwards a few feet. It was enough to break his concentration on forming the cero and the energy dissipated. Immediately, it was lost in the incoming snow.

The hollow growled in response.

Ulquiorra opened his eyes and looked at Zero. She stood with her back to him, protecting him. He snorted at the absurdity of this entire situation. Here he was, the 4th Espada, broken beyond repair because of that...that _human._ Anger still fueled his veins. He was unable to complete his mission, unable to save Zero. She was right. He underestimated the human heart, underestimated _him_. He watched the human as he fought to protect his friends and watched Zero now as she stood in front of him, preventing the human's final blow, he felt he was on the verge of understanding. He was putting the puzzle together. The whys of wanting to watch over Zero were becoming clearer and fit into place. But now… He looked at his torn body and knew there wasn't anything else to be done. He looked at her again.

Zero stood in front of him in her released form. Although he was with Aizen and the others when Granz had her perform in the arena, they were all blinded by the endless snow and were not able to see much from their vantage point until the massacre was over. But now that she was this close, he could see her full form.

Her hair was several inches longer, her raven locks flowing down her back. As the wind from her reiatsu swirled around her, he could see the skeletal bone structure of her hollows spine down her back. Six fingers on each side spread out and formed into black wings of a hell butterfly.

She took a step back and turned towards him. Black sclera covered her eyes making her violet irises stand out dramatically. Black horns protruded from either side of her head and curled out and downward in an odd "S" shape. From her front, the white bone stood out brightly against the black part of her wings. Her white uniform jacket was torn off, leaving the white tube top to cover her chest. The hollow hole was larger and was dark compared to her near white skin. Her white hakama was torn and ragged on the bottom, her bare feet were exposed.

In her hand was her Zanpaktou. A snowflake shaped guard covered her right hand while a solid white blade protruded from both sides.

"Ulquiorra," she said as she continued to look at him as if waiting for a command.

"Zero…" he grunted. She was Aizen's weapon to command as he saw fit. To use as he saw fit. That thought while once agreeable, now angered him. She didn't need to be controlled. She released on her own, she was thinking on her own. She was -

Ichigo's hollow recovered from his stumble and roared regaining everyone's attention.

"STOP!" Inoue yelled, "Please, Kurosaki-kun! Please stop!" She ran in front of him and put her hand up as if to stop him. Ishida panicked.

"Orihime! Get away from him!" He yelled.

"This is my fault!" she yelled back. The hollow used Sonido and appeared in front of Ishida. He growled and pulled his Zanpaktou from his gut and swung, meaning to cut his head off. Instead of meeting flesh, it clanked against a solid object. Ishida managed to open his eyes and saw that one of Zero's blades was pushing back against the hollow right above his head. Zero lifted her left hand and a small blue orb of reiatsu formed. She pushed the hollow away with her Zanpaktou and released her bala. She looked at the woman and motioned towards Ishida.

"Heal him."

Orihime snapped out of her stupor and rushed to his side, her hands already on her hair pins. Before Zero could turn, the hollow wrapped his big hand around her throat and lifted her off the ground. He brought her eye level where his yellow irises locked onto her violet ones. For several minutes no one moved.

Zero huffed and slammed her head into his. The hollow inhaled sharply before throwing her across the dome. She skidded to the edge, her head falling over as she came to a stop. Quickly, she was on her feet and charged at him. She threw a succession of balas at him. The hollow charged a cero. Zero glanced at the humans and saw they were safely behind the woman's shield. As the hollow released it, Zero threw herself down in front of Ulquiorra and spread her wings out so they would absorb the blast. The dome cracked as her hands and knees were pushed into it from the pressure. When the energy disbursed, Zero gave in and let her body fall completely flat. Several minutes later, the dust cleared and the hollow walked over to her still form. As he brought down his sword from above, Zero turned and caught the blade in her hand. The blade went into her skin and stopped at the bone. Crimson liquid flowed freely, staining her arm as it dripped down, making a _ticking _sound as it hit the top of the dome. She looked at the hollow and watched as he reared his head and made a sound that resembled laughter.

"Zero," Ulquiorra whispered as he looked at her. She was cut in several places and her hand was still pouring out blood. He frowned. They were all expendable in Aizen's eyes. Tools to get him what he wanted. Used as shields and pawns in his personal game. His web of lies and deceit were never-ending. Ulquiorra knew how they were all lied to, how Zero was lied to yet he played along. He had his place. Empty promises of how things were to be once Aizen succeeded. He wondered what would happen to her once that happened; if that happened. He grunted. She would be killed once her usefulness was gone. That thought unsettled him.

Suddenly the beast stopped laughing and roared in pain. He looked down at the white blade that was impaled in his left flank. He watched as the area around it started to ice over and roared again as he pulled the blade out, breaking it off in the process and threw it to the ground. He snarled and backhanded Zero, sending her across the dome.

Zero shook her head and wiped the blood from her eyes as she sat up. Her broken Zanpaktou was lying by Ulquiorra. She scanned the area trying to find _him_. She felt his fist in her spine before she saw him behind her as he materialized. Before she could move and regain her breath, he flipped her over onto her back. Instantly he was on her, straddling her with his hand on her throat, pinning her down. Her arms were behind her, stuck. She stayed absolutely still as the hollow snarled at her. Her eyes locked with his. She felt the pressure ease off of her throat, he was allowing her to breathe. The hollow looked confused but maintained his grip.

"Kurosaki-kun!" Orihime yelled. The hollow looked at the woman. Zero used the distraction to her advantage and wriggled her body. She managed to free her bloodied hand and grimaced as she fought against the burning sensation of the bala that formed. She pushed against his chest and released it sending him away from her by several yards. Using Sonido, she picked up her Zanpaktou and ran her fingers over the broken blade. As her fingers passed over the edge, a new blade formed in its place making it whole again. With a puff of cold air, it was fixed. She held it in front of her and readied her stance. The wind picked up as her reiatsu flowed through her and out from the blades. Dark blue reiatsu and snow swirled violently around her. She pointed her finger to a spot just in front of Ulquiorra. A thick wall of ice, snow and reiatsu formed as a barrier. She narrowed her eyes and focused on the hollow.

Ichigo's hollow whipped his Zanpaktou, sending a wave of black and red reiatsu towards her. Zero put both hands on her sword and formed a cero to counter the wave. The blast met in the middle and sent them both backwards. She glanced at Ulquiorra and made sure the wall was holding before getting up. She pointed one of the blades toward the hollow as he was standing and sent a wall of snow and ice in his direction. He was quickly overcome and encased inside the wall. Temporarily frozen, Zero took a breath. As the ice cracked, she pointed the other end of the sword at him and giant spiked shards of ice about a foot thick grew up from the ground all pointed at the hollow. The ice wall crumbled and the hollow charged a cero. Zero threw her hand up, the spikes flew from the ground and encased the hollow once more, but not before he released his cero.

With the blast coming right at her, Zero wrapped her wings around her body completely encased herself and braced her legs. Her feet dug into the top of the dome, further cracking and breaking it apart. Splinters of the dome dug into her bare feet. The cero ripped and tore the flesh of her wings, leaving her exposed. When the blast was over she released her damaged wings and jumped into the air.

Ichigo's hollow had broken most of the spikes, but not before a few of them had torn through his skin. Infuriated, he whipped his Zanpaktou again and sent another wave towards Zero. Another red ball formed between his horns. Zero dodged the wave, but was unable to avoid the other one she didn't see behind it.

Caught in the Getsuga Tensho, Zero slammed back down onto the dome. Panting, she held her hand up and built another wall of snow and reiatsu in front of herself and waited for the blast from the cero to hit.

"Daiguren Hyorinmaru!"

Zero looked up and saw Toshio in bankai rise up from the side of the dome. He flew in front of the hollow and brought his Zanpaktou down, cutting off the hollow's horn. The cero energy exploded, breaking the mask that covered Ichigo's face. The mask, now broken, fell in pieces to the ground. Ichigo followed behind them, unconscious. He immediately transformed back to his Shinigami form.

Zero watched Toshiro as he landed and stepped back from her position. Would he want to continue the fight? She adjusted the grip on her Zanpaktou.

"Are you ok, Zero?" he called out to her.

_I will protect you…_

She shook the thought away. She would fight them all if she had too, but Ulquiorra… She lowered the barrier and her Zanpaktou. The snow stopped as she let go of her released form. The fight was over. She wiped the blood from her eyes once more.

"Kurosaki-kun!" Orihime yelled once more as she found her feet and ran to his side. She gasped as she watched the hole in his chest close. She felt relief wash over herself as he took a breath. Ishida cautiously watched Zero as she looked at Ulquiorra. The wall she erected earlier was gone. He lay there, broken and torn beyond his regenerating powers. He would fade soon.

Ichigo sat up and rubbed his head, confused as to what was going on. He took in the blood and the wrecked dome. The last thing he remembered was fighting Ulquiorra. He remembered losing…he remembered Inoue calling to him… And then the memories go dark. He looked at Ishida and although he was healed, he was still bloody. He looked at Ulquiorra's body strewn across half the dome and knew only his hollow would have been able to do that.

"Inoue… What happened?"

"Your hollow…" was all she could manage as a flood of emotions filled her. He turned towards Zero and his held his breath as his eyes widened. Half of her face was red with blood. Her hand lay limply by her side. She was a bloody mess…did he? He tried to stand. "Kurosaki-kun!" Orihime said as she held him down. "Don't move so quickly, you might still be hurt."

"Zero," Ulquiorra grunted. Cautiously, she made her way to his side varying her glance between Toshiro who was still in bankai and the humans that were surrounding Ichigo. Toshiro readied his stance and had Hyorinmaru ready. He had heard this Espada give Zero an order once before and would not be blindsided again.

She reached his side and knelt beside him, her hands in her lap. Blood was everywhere. Some of it Ichigo's hollow, some of it hers, most of it his. His legs were gone, his left arm was trying to regenerate, but it was slow.

"I understand…Zero…" he said. She looked at him, puzzled. "Heart," he held his broken right hand out to her which she took as he closed his eyes.

"Ulquiorra…" While her memories were taken, she was a fast learner and quickly picked up on the many roles people had. Human, Shinigami, Hollow, Espada – they all had a part to play to keep the cycle going. Ichimaru-sama would tell her things about the Shinigami, teaching her their strengths and weaknesses – giving her an understanding. He was a firm believer in 'know thy enemy'. She looked at Toshiro. He was a strong Shinigami. Perhaps… "Shinigami," Zero said flatly. "You can…help him…"

His eyes widened as his understanding of what she was asking sunk in. Performing Konso on a known war criminal was forbidden. "Zero, I can't."

"Why?"

"Because he's not just a hollow, he's – "

"Do it!" Zero demanded. Ulquiorra was one of Lord Aizen's most loyal subjects. He did not abandon her, nor did he see her as defective. He saved her from Grimmjow's cero. No, he did not deserve to just fade away. Lord Aizen might not find this acceptable, but he was not here. He left her behind.

She turned back to Toshiro and lowered her voice. "I will go with you."

"What?"

"I will go with you."

"Zero -"

"You came here…for me," she said as her eyes met and held his. Silence filled the area as Toshiro closed his eyes. He was already in trouble for defying the Soutaicho. What was one more thing? He moved in front of Ulquiorra and reversed Hyorinmaru, extending the hilt. As the end of the hilt started to glow, Ulquiorra opened his eyes. The hand that was regenerating turned to ash. He took his last breath as Toshiro tapped his forehead. Instantly he was gone.

"Did it work?" Ishida asked.

"I don't know," Toshiro responded honestly. He looked at Zero who was looking at the pile of ash in her hand. She watched as a small breeze carried most it away in the air. For once, her thoughts were quiet.


	17. Chapter 17

**AN: It's impossible to keep everyone happy when you're writing a story like this. There will be some aspects you're not going to like. There are some I don't care for, but it has a mind of its own. Its path has been decided and I am working on the details. If you want to see where it goes, please, join me. If not, that's ok. If you find this story a "disgrace" to "true" HitsuRuki fans then don't read it. Or at least, hold off your criticism until the tale has ended. To judge a story at this point is like reading the jacket cover and saying you've read "War and Peace"... **

**Onward…**

* * *

><p>Chapter 17<p>

Zero stayed absolutely still and waited until the last of Ulquiorra's ashes floated away before she looked at Toshiro. He had already sealed his bankai and had moved towards the other human. They were helping the Quincy sit up. That woman's powers of healing were truly amazing. Although he moved like he was stiff, there were no traces of him being gutted at all…even his uniform was restored to its bright white.

Ichigo was standing over him and apologizing for his hollows actions in what happened. Zero shook her head and looked out beyond the dome. With everyone gone, it was only a matter of time before the pain returned like before. It was already starting to come and go at random intervals and it was just as intense as she remembered. It was the start of the end; an end that would be welcome to this pathetic existence. She wondered how long she had left.

_Weak and pathetic._

She blinked, frowning she turned towards the others.

"Stop with the questions! I told you I don't remember what happened!" Ichigo yelled defensively.

"You were going to fire a cero at near point blank range!" Toshiro ground out. He closed his eyes and tried to calm himself.

"I know!" Ichigo yelled. "I lost control. I won't let that happen again!"

"You can't guarantee that!"

"I can!"

"Are you willing to bet everyone's lives on your arrogance? "

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the war! I'm talking about when we go back to your world! I'm talking about Zero…"

"She would have survived it," Ishida stated as he carefully adjusted his sitting position. He coughed, interrupting them. The two men looked at him. "With all due respect, you didn't see her fight, Hitsugaya. She was holding her own and was able to absorb two ceros so the likelihood of a third was pretty high."

"Two…ceros?" Toshiro asked incredulously. He looked at Zero who was now watching them. Toshiro thought about what Urahara had said about her power and frowned. She may be powerful but he will never forget how she looked as he came up over the dome; bleeding profusely, wings torn, partially incinerated and the look of distrust on her face as she saw him. He shook his head trying to clear the image from his mind. "We need to find the others and get out of here." He knew once the Espada's lab lost Kurotsuchi's interest, he would resume looking for them. Zero in particular. His frown deepened.

Zero moved to stand, but the blinding pain in her head returned as soon as she was half way up, making her stumble. She felt a hand under her arm that helped to steady her. She turned and glared.

"Do not touch me!" she spat as she pushed Ichigo away. He caught her damaged hand and held it up in front of her eyes forcing her to look at the still oozing gash and the bone that was exposed. With most of her reiatsu spent, it would take her longer to regenerate and heal.

"Not before we fix this," he replied. He softened his gaze and his voice, "I'm…sorry, Zero. My hollow, I… I should have had better control over it. What I did… What happened – "

"Was nothing," she said as she forcefully removed her hand from his grasp. She may have offered herself as prisoner, but she was hardly going to stand there and be insulted by this human. Powerful or not he was treating her like…like she was…

_Weak and pathetic._

Frustrated she turned away.

"Hold on," Ichigo said as he gripped her shoulders, making her face him once more. He almost cringed as he felt the hollow bone across her shoulder. "I just… I wanted to make sure you were ok."

In all honesty, she was anything but ok. She was confused. She did not know how to deal with these new thoughts and her actions…just what in the hell was she doing? She should kill them all and show Aizen-sama just how strong she really was. Prove to him that she should be by his side and not the blithering idiot. But then…

She looked at her hand and narrowed her eyes. "I am ok," she mocked.

"Kurosaki -kun," Inoue said as she joined the pair. "Maybe Kuchiki-san, I mean…um, Zero-san would let me help her?" Ichigo glanced at Inoue before giving a curt nod. Zero watched him leave with a defeated, sad look on his face. She frowned. "Z-Zero-san?" Zero looked at the woman, the one Lord Aizen wanted in a mission that went badly for everyone involved. "I – I can't heal you, but maybe, if you will let me, I can bandage you?" Her soft grey eyes were actually pleading with her own.

Zero stared intently at her for several minutes. Ulquiorra had found her worthy of the title "woman" rather than "trash" as he called everyone beneath him. To him, Inoue Orihime was almost an equal. Her grey eyes were soft and kind. They didn't hold an ounce of deception; which only confused Zero that much more. Aizen-sama said everyone had an agenda to use who and what they could to their own advantage. To play the game and win, you had to be the user. This woman was only a pawn in a greater game. Here because of Aizen-sama's whim to be used as he wished.

_Like Rukia._

Zero's eyes widened at the realization. She mentally shook the thought away. Rukia was dead. She was _before_ and_ before_ no longer mattered. What mattered now was serving Aizen Sama.

_By turning yourself over to the Shinigami?_

Her eyes narrowed. Aizen-sama's plan was to bring all three worlds together and rule them all. He would take the pain away. Trust in him, he will…

He will…

"_He is magnificent, isn't he?" Tosen said, "He is perfect. While I would love to stay here and watch him destroy you, Zero, but we have things to do."_

"_Fukusuru, Zero," Aizen said as he appeared behind Tosen. "It is time I put in motion part of my plan. While I originally included you in it, I find that you would be better off staying here."_

He will…

"_You are nothing! You lay there all smug in knowing you are his favorite, but that will change. He will toss you aside like the Shinigami." Granz said as he took a breath, adjusted his glasses and started to grin. "The Shinigami didn't care that we took you from them. No one came, no one missed you. You were as worthless to them as you will be here. Lord Aizen will soon know how flawed you are. He will create perfection and toss you aside. And then," Granz said as he laughed, "then I will destroy you!"_

He will…

She shook her head. She was tossed aside as Granz predicted. Wonderweiss was Lord Aizen's weapon now. He was strong; he had no thoughts to confuse him. No pain to debilitate him, no drugs to depend on. She was nothing more than a failed experiment.

Pain shot through her brain like a lightning bolt. She held her head and dropped to her knees.

"ZERO!" Toshiro shouted as he came over. Kneeling behind her, he held her so she wouldn't fall over. He smoothed her hair while pushing it to the side, exposing the "0" on her neck. He quickly fished out a syringe from his sleeve and injected her with the bluish contents.

"Zero-san…" Inoue said as she looked at her tattoo. "That will help her?" Ichigo came over and watched.

"Urahara-san gave you that?" He guessed. Toshiro nodded his eyes still on Zero.

"She's dependant on that for survival," Ichigo said as he looked at Inoue explaining. "It might not be exactly what they give her here, but it worked before," Ichigo said as he focused on Zero. Ishida was behind him. With the injection complete, they waited.

Several minutes went by before Zero opened her eyes and looked at everyone before closing them again. Her mind was calm, the pain was gone. She was saved by these people once again. Frowning, she lifted her damaged hand which was starting to heal. Several lines of muscle grew together and were now covering the bone. The gashes and holes on her feet were healed to scrapes. The bleeding on her head ceased, and it too was healing albeit slowly.

"If you released your resurreccion, wouldn't that instantly heal your wounds?" Ishida asked. Zero blinked. "The Espada I fought earlier said that that is what happens."

"I am not like them," she said softly. "I was –" Zero gasped in shock as Inoue threw her arms around her in a hug.

"I am happy you are better," she said as tears sprang to her eyes. This woman was truly different; or truly insane. Zero pried herself away and looked at her. Slowly, she held her damaged hand out to her. Inoue smiled and tore the bottom of her coat into small, long strips. She began chatting away mindlessly about the different things she would cook for Zero once they returned to the living world as she went to work wrapping her hand.

The endless chatter was nothing more than a hum inside her mind. Zero was lost after trying to understand the woman within the first few sentences and her mind hurt trying to keep up.

"I can't sense Chad anymore. I noticed a change as this last fight started but I couldn't do anything about it." Ichigo said as he started to pace. Satisfied Zero was taken care of, he could move on to the next pressing matter. "And now there's nothing."

"Oh," Inoue said sadly. "Sado-kun."

"Then we'll find him. Abarai is close by," Toshiro said.

"And so are the other two Captains," Ishida said as he adjusted his glasses. "Do you think they're going to let you walk out of here with Zero? How many are here?"

"Kurotsuchi and Kenpachi along with Nemu and Isane from what I sensed earlier," Toshiro said.

Ichigo frowned, "Kenpachi interrupted my fight with one of the fraccions. He told me to leave and complete my mission here. That's when I found Zero." He looked at Toshiro. "Take her and Inoue back to the living world. I'll find Chad and Renji and keep the others busy."

"Kurosaki-kun," Inoue started to protest.

"Inoue, we need to get you and Zero out of here. We can't let the others find her," Ichigo said. He turned to Zero. "Can you open a Garganta?" Zero looked at him and gave him a small nod. She stepped away from Inoue and brought her hand up.

"Wait!" Inoue said as she held her hands up. Zero paused. "What about Aizen?"

"It might be better if we all just stayed together," Ishida offered. "If Aizen went to our world already chances are most of Soul Society is there. No offence, but if your goal is to hide Zero, that's not going to work."

"He's right," Toshiro said. "Soul Society would send most of the court guards including the Soutaicho. With the 12th monitoring any Garganta activity, we'll be spotted as soon as we cross over."

"Fine, we'll stay together. When we cross over, I'll create a diversion and you can get Zero back to Urahara," Ichigo said. Toshiro nodded. It wasn't the best plan, but it was better than nothing.

"We had better get moving," Ishida said.

Toshiro looked at Zero. Inoue had finished wrapping her head with make shift bandages. He was slightly surprised and also glad that she let Inoue get close enough to help. That only confirmed his thoughts that Rukia was still alive in there, somewhere. She had to be, she was -

"_Rukia died…here."_

A chill went down his spine as his frown returned. He cleared his mind and pushed all thoughts away before focusing on Kurosaki.

"How are we going to get down?" Inoue asked.

"That's not a problem, Inoue," Ichigo said as he picked her up and slung her over his shoulder. She started to protest and her face turned beet red. Ichigo ignored her protests and jumped over the edge. Ishida shook his head and followed. Zero looked once more at the spot where Ulquiorra was lying.

"I don't know if I made it in time," Toshiro said as he followed her gaze. He tried to read her face. It was hard before with her perfection of the Kuchiki mask blocking her emotions, but now… Now it was impossible. She looked at him and gave him a small nod before following Ishida over the side.

* * *

><p>White sands greeted them as they reached the bottom. Renji's reiatsu was stronger from this position and was rapidly fluctuating. He was fighting. Ichigo tried to pinpoint his location and immediately headed in that direction.<p>

They reached a small hill and stopped. Renji was just ahead fighting not one, but many hollow that all looked the same. They were shaped like male humans, but had skulls for heads. Behind the small army, was a tall hollow with a head that resembled a bull.

"Sado-kun!" Inoue exclaimed as she was set down. Ichigo looked at her and then he felt it; a small flicker from his friend. He felt himself breathe and smiled at her in return. "He'll be ok!"

"Isane is with your human friend," Toshiro said as he tried to focus. Kurotsuchi concerned him the most and he wanted to make sure he had not left the lab. Kenpachi was apparently, still fighting. He didn't like Kurotsuchi and Kenpachi being there at all and was surprised the Soutaicho sent them. He glanced at Zero.

"_Is she worth it?"_ Urahara's voice floated through his mind. His hands fisted at his sides.

"We need to help Renji," Ichigo said as he drew Zangetsu once more.

"Zero, who are they?" Toshiro asked. Zero looked at the thirty hollow, all the same, and frowned as she tried to place them. Her interactions with the rest of the Espada were limited. Lord Aizen kept her away from them in her

_cell_

room so that they would not taint her mind and fill it with thoughts and ideas he didn't want. Some would come to the arena and watch her train. While never formally introduced, she knew several by name. None of them looked like those in front of her now though.

"I do not know," she answered finally.

"How could you not know?" Ishida asked, surprised.

"You know all Shinigami?" she replied without missing a beat. Ishida was about to respond when Ichigo cut him off.

"It doesn't matter who they are, they will be defeated shortly," Ichigo said as he took off.

"Kurosaki-kun!" Inoue called after him. As she started to follow, the hollow with the bull shaped head appeared in front of her. She froze as she looked up at him. They stood for several seconds. He broke out in a smile as his gaze shifted to the rest of the group and assessed their condition.

"This is going to be- " He stopped as his eyes came to a rest on Zero. Without another word he used Sonido and rejoined his group. In an instant, they all disappeared.

Ichigo and Renji stood there, scratching their heads.

"What was that all about?" Ichigo asked.

"I don't know. One minute I'm fighting them, the next they're gone!" Renji said. He looked at the group up on the hill. "What happened here?"

"Long story, but Zero is coming with us. Do you know who they were?" Renji gave him an odd look before responding.

"He said he was Rudbornn Chelute and was the leader of the Exequias, an army that cleans up after battles and gathers information for Aizen. He said an Espada named Ulquiorra was fighting and that I was not allowed to pass and interfere. I could tell it was you and the others up there."

"Yeah," Ichigo replied as he glanced at Zero.

Seemingly out of nowhere, an Espada appeared in front of Inoue. He was tall with wavy brown hair that hung down to his shoulders. His grey eyes seemed almost apologetic as he wrapped his arms around the girl.

"Sorry, I don't really want to do this, but…" The group was shocked at his sudden appearance. As Toshiro realized what was going on, he drew Hyorinmaru and was about to attack.

"Let her go!" He yelled, but just as quick as he appeared, he disappeared taking Inoue with him.

"What the hell?"

"Starrk," Zero said as she frowned.

"Starrk? Another Espada?" Ishida asked. Zero nodded. "Where would he take her?" Renji and Ichigo joined them at the top of the hill.

"What number is he?" Renji asked. Zero looked at him.

"One."

"So with you, we can defeat him and get Orihime-san back," Ishida said.

Toshiro frowned. "No."

"What?"

"I said no," Toshiro replied as he addressed the group. "Zero is not a weapon to be used; by either side."

Ishida shook his head in disagreement.

"Where have you been? That last guy we fought took everything out of Kurosaki as it was. It took him losing control to his hollow to defeat him and he was only number four! A weapon is exactly what Zero is and it's one we need to use in order to get Orihime-san back and get the hell out of here!"

"I will not –" Toshiro stopped and gasped.

Ichigo's eyes widened.

Zero froze.

"Can you hear me?" a familiar voice asked. "My dear invaders…"


	18. Chapter 18

**AN: Thank you for your reviews and pm's… I am forever grateful to you all for your patience. Yuzu – an IchiHime? Ug… Once – I did it once and only to fit that particular story… :P**

**Hokaku = capture. And before you comment and say that Toshiro is uber powerful and doesn't have to chant that particular spell let me remind you what Rukia said in Season 1 – chanting gives the spell that much more power… That and I thought it was cool…**

* * *

><p>Chapter 18<p>

"What number is he?" Renji asked. Zero looked at him.

"One."

"So with you, we can defeat him and get Orihime-san back," Ishida said.

Toshiro frowned. "No."

"What?"

"I said no," Toshiro replied as he addressed the group. "We are not going to use her."

"She is a weapon," Ishida said.

"I don't care! She is not to be used by either side!"

Ishida shook his head in disagreement.

"Where have you been? That last guy we fought took everything out of Kurosaki as it was. It took him losing control to his hollow to defeat him and he was only number four! A weapon is exactly what Zero is and it's one we need to use in order to get Orihime-san back and get the hell out of here!"

"I will not –" Toshiro stopped and gasped. Ichigo's eyes widened. Zero froze.

"Can you hear me?" a familiar voice asked. "My dear invaders, for your continued success against my Espada, allow me to express my congratulations…"

"Aizen!" Toshiro ground out.

"Aizen?" Ishida asked. He cocked his head and realized that he was using the same kind of kido Isane used when they were in Soul Society, Tenteikurra; the art of communication.

"While I am interested to see how you would fare with the rest of my army," Aizen continued, "I am to the point where I must leave you for a while. But do not worry."

"What have you done with Inoue?" Ichigo yelled.

"The Hogyoku isn't supposed to be awake for another four months!" Renji said.

"Leaving?" Ishida asked.

"Inoue Orihime," Aizen said, "is in the fifth tower. If you wish to get her back, you are welcomed to try as I have no further use for her. The rest of you, on the other hand, well…that is a different story."

Zero frowned. She knew what became of those Aizen-sama had no use for. Her eyes looked from Toshiro to Ishida to Renji to Ichigo. They would have to hurry if they were to get to her before the others. Orihime wasn't a fighter; she wouldn't be able to hold any of them off for very long. Not even a weak one.

"Her ability is truly a remarkable one and I knew that if I had her, those in Soul Society would be concerned with what I could do with her powers. They would be more worried about Soul Society than the human world and thus, fortify their own leaving the human world defenseless."

"That…that can't be true…They would never do that," Ichigo stated.

"Of course not," Toshiro replied. "That was the whole point of me being there in the first place. To assess the situation so we could formulate a plan that would protect the living world."

"By taking her I have also succeeded in trapping three of Soul Societies finest captains and one Shinigami daiko who is considered one of their strongest allies, leaving the Gotei thirteen divided." With that, several loud audible booms were heard in several areas overhead. "I have sealed all Gargantas. So please, enjoy your stay as you will be here for quite a while."

"NO!" Ichigo yelled.

"Where is he going?"

"He must be going to Karakura Town! It'll be destroyed!" Ishida yelled.

"We have to get Inoue and get back there as soon as possible!" Ichigo said.

"How? Aizen closed all the gates leading back," Ishida said.

"Zero, are you still able to – "

"Zero…" Aizen said. A chill went down Toshiro's spine as he watched her hand freeze in mid-motion as she attempted to open a gate. "I am disappointed in your recent behavior. After everything I have done for you, everything I have given you. Ah, none the less. I have no doubt that you will make it up to me." Zero gasped. Of course he would know of her actions. She gave herself to the enemy so easily. She looked at Toshiro. "I wish I could see their faces. I am sure they have already tried to turn you against me, haven't they?"

"Run," she said. The others looked at her. Toshiro had a guess as what was going to come next and had his hand on Hyorinmaru. He flash stepped in front of Zero putting himself between her and the others as he pulled his Zanpaktou. Ichigo readied Zangetsu while the others looked at them questioningly. Zero didn't understand.

Why were they not leaving to save the woman?

What were they doing?

Zero gasped. All that talk about protecting her…saving her… She looked at them and frowned. Their faces revealed nothing, but their stances were all she needed to see. They were going to fight her. They tricked her.

_No._

"While your reasoning is admirable, Zero, do not think that your fate would have been any different from Ulquiorra had you actually left with them. You are no longer a Shinigami. You are their enemy."

"I am…" she whispered.

"NO!" Toshiro yelled. "That's not true, Aizen!"

"Don't listen to him, Zero!" Ichigo shouted.

Zero looked at them, confused. She shook her head and took a step back.

"Show them their efforts are in vain, Zero. Show them why you are mine. Hokaku, Zero," Aizen finished. Her eyes glazed over and without missing a step, she drew her sword with her wrapped hand and held the other up, palm out. Her reiatsu flowed and the wind picked up. Renji, who was already worn down from fighting, stumbled as the cold reiatsu felt heavy.

"Bankai!" Toshiro yelled as a bala formed in her hand.

"What's going on?" Renji asked as he too pulled Zabimaru and planted himself firmly in the sand. The reiatsu was intense.

"Get Inoue!" Toshiro yelled to the others. He swung his sword as the bala came after him. "I will deal with Zero!" Hyorinmaru made contact with the bala, dispersing the energy. The others quickly shielded their eyes.

"What? No!" Ichigo yelled. Zero already had another bala in her hand and flicked a glance to Ichigo. "There's no way I'm leaving you here."

"You heard Aizen!" Toshiro responded as he flash stepped in front of her once again. Zero changed direction, turned and released her bala towards Ishida. Ichigo flash stepped in front of him and used the same motion Toshiro did to disperse the energy. When the flash was gone, Ishida looked at Ichigo.

"Thanks," he said. He looked at Zero. "What happened? Has she changed her mind?"

"No," Ichigo replied in a low voice. "She's being controlled through Aizen." The two watched Toshiro and Zero engage. Their swords met and sparks flew.

"Zero!" Toshiro yelled, "Snap out of this!" Zero threw a half charged bala at Toshiro. He was sent reeling backwards towards the others. He let out a small groan as he stood and shook himself off.

"Toshiro!" Ichigo yelled.

"You need to get to the fifth tower and save your friend. Now!" Toshiro responded as he lunged towards Zero once more. Their swords came together once again; ice formed around them, fusing them. Zero tugged, but the ice held firm. With her other hand, she used her reiatsu and punched Toshiro in his gut. The force was enough to separate the metal and shatter the ice. He flew back several meters before regaining his balance. He turned his full attention to Zero and spread his palms up, "Shakkaho!" The red fire flew from his hands and caught Zero in her right shoulder, pushing her backwards and down onto the ground.

Ichigo hesitated and looked at Zero once more. A strong part of him wanted to stay and help her. She was being controlled, what if Toshiro went too far… His free hand started to bleed as he clutched his fist tightly. Aizen would pay for this. Rukia would never -

"We have to hurry," Ishida urged him. "Inoue is defenseless and alone and who knows who is there with her!"

Sighing Ichigo turned away from the fight. "I'll be back as soon as I can," he vowed. He looked at Renji and Ishida.

"I'll stay here and see if I can help the taicho," Renji said as he watched their fight. Zero was back on the offensive and had Toshiro backing up with each bala she threw.

"I'll leave it to you then…"

* * *

><p>"Stop this, Zero! I know you're in there!" Toshiro yelled as he dodged a stream of ice and snow as it shot into the sky. "Fight him! Do you hear me? Fight the control Aizen has on you!" As their swords came together he looked into her vacant, violet eyes. He didn't see her fist until it was too late. Her punch sent him reeling backwards. He skidded to a stop and stood. He spat blood and adjusted his hold on Hyorinmaru.<p>

_If I get serious, I'll hurt her. If I don't, I'll die. _He narrowed his eyes.

"Bankai!" Renji yelled as he came up behind Toshio. A big cloud of dust formed as Zabimaru transformed. When it cleared, he spoke. "I think if we tag team her, we can bring her down."

"I don't want her hurt."

"Taicho…No matter what your feelings are, I know in my heart Rukia would not have wanted this."

"Abarai…"

"To turn her Zanpaktou on a friend…she would have killed herself first," he said as he seemed to be thinking of a memory. "Zero is not Rukia."

"I know this!"

"Then you should also know that we know nothing about Zero other than she belongs to Aizen."

"That's not true. Zero has compassion and reason otherwise she would not have agreed to come with us. I believe that while she is no longer the Rukia we all knew and…, Zero has a part of Rukia inside her. Her mannerisms down to the way she fights is Rukia and that is something I cannot disregard!"

"Taicho…"

"I believe that if we give her the chance to heal her mind and undo some of the things Aizen has done to her…"

"Then what? She'll forgive you for what you've done to her? Forgive us for not coming after her?"

"NO!"

"Too much has been done to her for her to go back to Soul Society! They're not going to accept her!"

"I know!"

"They're going to destroy her after they tear her apart!"

"I KNOW!"

"Then face it! Rukia is GONE!" Renji was in Toshiro's face almost nose to nose. Sighing, he took a small step back. "We failed her," he almost whispered.

Zero held her hands apart and charged a cero while the men were talking. She released it and repositioned her sword. Toshiro and Renji flash stepped apart, narrowly missing the blast. Renji gathered his reiatsu and released his cannon.

Zero smirked and closed her eyes. Her reiatsu swirled around her and as the cannon blast came, tons of sand and dust flew into the air blocking the view.

"We can't help Rukia anymore," Renji insisted. "But we can free her. Free her from that…that thing in front of us." He frowned in determination as he gripped the hilt of Zabimaru. The way he saw it, Aizen killed Rukia and is using her body for what is now Zero. Zero will never be Rukia. What was before him was an abomination. Somewhere in his mind he knew his best friend wouldn't rest, wouldn't be at peace until Zero was destroyed. If he defeated her, maybe he could atone for doing nothing when Rukia was first taken. It wouldn't be much, but it would be a start. Killing Aizen would be the finish. He didn't care if he died trying. He couldn't let his friend go on like this anymore.

Toshiro shook his head and focused on Zero's position. Renji was wrong. He knew it in his mind and he knew it in his heart. Rukia was still there, only different. For several minutes they stood still watching and waiting. The cold air became frigid as snow and ice started to fall. A blast emanating from the point where Zero was blew the sand, dust and snow back at them.

The wind howled and the snow was blinding. Zero released her Zanpaktou. The ceiling of Los Noches cracked and separated from the sheer force of her reiatsu. As she spread her semi-healed wings, she gripped her Zanpaktou and pointed it towards Renji and Toshiro. Ice flowed from the tip and formed large sharp pillars around the men. Before they could react, she released another cero.

The energy blast was hot and melted some of the smaller shards that held the pillars in place. Toshiro was the first to recover and threw his arm in the air.

"Hainawa!" He yelled as the yellow rope flew from the tips of his fingers and encircled Zero, bounding her arms to her body.

Frowning, she took a step back and tried to move. Still stuck, she gathered her reiatsu and pushed. Renji looked on as she struggled. The ropes were loosening.

"She's going to break it!" Renji yelled over the wind. But Toshiro was already chanting.

"Carriage of Thunder. Bridge of a spinning wheel. With light, divide this into six! Rikujokoro!" Zero freed herself from the rope and was able to release another bala towards Toshiro. As six beams of light slammed into Zero's midsection, Renji flashed in front of Toshiro and dispersed the energy with Zabimaru… and then fell over. The bala had several shards of ice hidden inside and caught Renji off guard. He was impaled in the midsection and shoulder. Renji and Zero dropped to the ground together. "Abarai!" Toshiro yelled as he knelt down. He glanced at Zero who was not yet moving.

"Taicho…she's…not…" Blood was spreading rapidly and was dripping down onto the sand forming a small pool.

"Abarai!" Toshiro yelled at the now unconscious man. "Damn!" he cursed as he readjusted Renji's sash to help control the bleeding. He tore the bottom of his hakama and tied it around his shoulder. He spared a glace over at Zero who was struggling to stand back up. Managing to get to her knees, she gathered her reiatsu and pushed. This time, she concentrated on one petal at a time. One by one, they broke.

Toshiro cursed again. He wasn't sure if he could hold her off without hurting her until she came to her senses; if that was even possible. If he used any of his powers too excessively…

_"Zero…Zero is more than an Espada. She is a weapon." Momo's eyes were on the ground, tears fell silently as she spoke softly, defeated. "Only Aizen-sama and a chosen few know all of her commands. That's how they control her. She has her own control until a command is given."_

_"I thought you said she would kill until she was killed?" Shinji asked._

_"They didn't tell me how to stop her," she said sadly._

"Of course…" Toshiro said as he remembered the conversation. Quickly his mind went back to when Zero was taken by the Espada. She was already under the control of a command given by Hinamori but he had given her another command that stopped her. What was it?

The last petal blew apart and Zero stood.

"Zero!" Toshiro yelled, "Mou ii yo!" and held his breath.

* * *

><p>It was quiet. He was lying on something soft. Not the ground. A mat? A bed? He wasn't sure. Why was he lying here? Where was he? Was he still dreaming? He struggled to open his teal eyes. His lids felt like they were a hundred pounds each. His body felt heavy. It was hard to move. He lifted his arm and brought it to his face. He cracked his lids and tried to focus. It was dark; almost too dark to see his hand.<p>

Where was he? His mind was foggy and seemed scrambled as he tried to put together where he was. He remembered… He remembered…

What?

He felt a chill run down his spine. There was something he was supposed to remember. Something he was doing? Was supposed to do? His mind hurt. It felt like it was run through by his own Zanpaktou. He put his hand to his head as he heard a small rustling of clothing coming from his right side. He focused his eyes as he tried to sit up. All he could make out was shadows.

"Who is there?" he asked.

"Shh.." cooed a familiar voice as he felt a small hand push him gently back down. Toshiro rubbed his eyes, but it was still too dark to see. He reached out but felt nothing but air.

"Who are you? What's going on?" He could make out a shadow of…someone… moving around the foot of his bed to the other side. "Where am I?"

"Shhh," said the voice again. "Rest now, I will explain it all to you later."

"But…"

"Shhh…You are safe but you were hurt. Rest and heal." Toshiro relaxed and tried to remember what was happening but he was tired. He felt a sharp prick in his arm. Warmth quickly spread from the site throughout his body. He was warm and tired. Something was wrong, out of place. There was something important he was missing. He struggled to remember, struggled to keep his eyes open.

"Shhh…Shiro-chan."


	19. Chapter 19

**AN: Thank you for your kind reviews and pm's **** Thank you for continuing to read even though I've been lax at keeping up with writing. **

**To those who are also following my other work in progress, I have not abandoned it, I promise. **

* * *

><p>Chapter 19<p>

She cracked open her eyes and looked at the familiar surroundings; a window, a bed, the door. A layer of frost and fog covered the floor of her (_cell) _room. The fog hovered a foot from the floor. She realized she was in her room, on her bed. Although her mind was quiet, she felt the pressure in the base of her skull and dreaded what was next. She would be in pain once again.

Good. She should be punished for…

What?

Her nose wrinkled as her brows came together as she sifted through her memory. She remembered Starrk taking the woman. Remembered Aizen-sama speaking to her and the feeling of confusion as to what would come next. When Aizen-sama stated he longer needed the woman, the others stood there and looked at her. Then Toshiro pulled his Zanpaktou and Ichigo did the same. She felt betrayed. They were going to take her down like Ulquiorra.

_Ulquiorra_

She shoved the thought away. Aizen-sama must have given her a command. His voice was the last thing she remembered before waking up here. In her (_cell) _room. She looked at her hands. The strips of cloth the woman wrapped them with were gone. Her hands were flawless. Not a scratch or scar remained. She wondered what happened to the woman; wondered if any of the Shinigami went to save her. She wondered if she killed them before they could.

She closed her eyes. It would have served them right.

She frowned. That thought was unsettling. Before she could examine it further the pressure in her head burst into full blown, blinding pain. To think about anything was torture. She sat up and assumed her usual position of her back to the wall and brought her knees up. She slowed her breathing down, cleared her mind of all thoughts and waited for the pain to subside.

She lost all track of time and couldn't tell if it had been hours or days before she heard something other than her own breathing. As her door opened, she opened her eyes. An Arrancar she had never seen before came in. Although the female was tall, she had a small frame. Her entire face, save her left eye, was still covered by her mask. She entered and sat on the bed. Zero watched as the woman motioned for her to lean forward. As she complied, she saw the female produce a syringe. With one fluid motion, she pulled Zero's head down, stuck the needle in and was back out of the door. Zero felt the familiar cool feeling as the contents quickly spread through her mind, instantly easing the pain.

Then the thoughts returned.

What happened? Were they dead? Did she kill them? She thought of the kindness the human woman displayed to her and frowned. Without thinking, Zero left her bed and stood at the door to her room and pulled on the handle. It didn't move.

There was no point in denying the fact this wasn't her room. It was her prison. She was not allowed the freedoms of the other Espada. She was not brought in for any of their meetings. She could not roam Los Noches freely like Grimmjow or Ulquiorra.

Ulquiorra….

Zero's frown deepened. He mentioned how he was starting to understand the woman and wondered what he meant. _"Heart" _he had said to her before he died.

"What does that mean?" she asked the empty room. A memory floated to the surface of her mind.

"_Rukia…She was loved by many. She was - " Toshiro had said._

_"Ichigo's Nakama," Zero mocked._

_"Mine as well!" Toshiro burst out. His hand was outstretched towards her, wanting to connect._

_"Means nothing,"_

"Nothing," she whispered and shook her head. She had seemed so sure of it then.

"_I will not fail you. I came to bring you home."_

She froze the lock and pushed open the door.

* * *

><p>"<em>Kuchiki! How many times do I have to tell you?" Toshiro said as he frowned. He grabbed the white blade and held it in front of him horizontally. "If you hold it this way you can attack and block at the same time." The raven haired woman returned his frown. With renewed determination in her violet eyes she gave him a short nod. "Again!" He said as he took a step back and brought up his own Zanpaktou in defense.<em>

_Rukia narrowed her eyes and charged at him. Their swords came together in an X formation. "Keep the pressure on, Kuchiki! Don't back off!" She pushed hard against his sword but found her feet being pushed in the opposite direction. _

"_Hitsugaya Taicho…" she breathed. She was giving it her all yet he would not budge. She was the one being pushed back. After several hours of training on top of a long day at work, she was at her limit._

"_Don't give up!" He yelled at her. Rukia planted her feet and dug into the last bit of reserve energy she had. _

_It was of no use. Again she was being pushed backwards. In a last ditch effort, she kicked her leg out and slid his out from under him. Their blades came apart and he fell with an ungraceful, "oof". Panting she smiled. He gave her a glare._

"_You cheated!" he bellowed as he sat back and stared at her._

"_You told me not to give up and I didn't. I just found another way to win is all," she said as she sheathed her Zanpaktou and held her arm out for him. He took it and grumbled as he stood. _

"_That was not the point of the lesson, Kuchiki." Although he was standing, he didn't let go of her arm. "The point of the lesson was to show you that you have an advantage to your opponents by being…" He looked into her eyes and held his breath. Have they always been that violet? _

"_By being what…Taicho?" She asked. He blushed and released her arm and cleared his throat. _

"_Short." He said and watched as her face turned red and the flames turned on in her eyes. Toshiro smiled. Instantly, the anger deflated out of her like a balloon and she returned his smile. _

"_Shiro-chan!"_

_A few minutes longer…_

…"_Shiro-chan!"…_

_No… I don't want to leave._

"Shiro-chan!"

Toshiro opened his eyes and turned his head. "Hina…mori?"

"It's about time you woke up, sleepy head. I was starting to worry about you. Are you feeling ok? Do you want to go back to the 4th?" Toshiro shook the cobwebs from his head and sat up. He was on his couch, in his office. The late afternoon sun shone through the window making him squint.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. "What am I doing here?" His mind was groggy, his vision still fuzzy. He blinked a few times before his eyes cleared and focused on a face that was right in front of him. One he knew for so long.

"It's ok," Momo said as she sat on the couch next to him.

"I…I don't remember how I got here," he frowned. "Or where I was… before…" He looked at his friend. "I don't remember." Toshiro stood up in a panic. He went to his desk and leafed through the small stack sitting there. Nothing but routine reports.

"Unohana- taicho suspected as much," Momo said as she stood and moved next to him. She placed her hand on his arm and gently guided him back to the couch to sit.

"Suspected what?"

"She suspected that you wouldn't remember after what happened on your last mission."

"Mission?"

"Yes. There was a new type of hollow found beyond the districts. They are very strong and powerful and don't look like hollows at all. They look like us and are called Arrancar."

"A-arrancar?"

"Yes. You and a small squad were sent to investigate. You were the only one to come back. You made your report to the Soutaicho and checked in at the 4th. You were hurt…" tears started to well up in her eyes as her body started to shake. "You were healed and released. As usual, you insisted on returning here, but once you sat down on the couch you passed out. I've been waiting here for you for a long time."

"How long?"

"A few days."

"I don't remember any of that," he said as concern and worry crossed his face.

"Unohana-taicho said that the Arrancar you fought had some sort of poison on his weapon. When it struck you, you were infected. She thinks you might remember everything eventually, but the real danger is hallucinations. What's the last thing you remember?"

_"Be happy, Toshiro."_

"I…" he blinked as his heart started to pound. He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. The pressure was starting to build behind his eyes as he tried to remember.

Rukia…

"Don't strain yourself or you'll pass out again!" She said as she gripped his hand tighter. Toshiro frowned. Images of Rukia broken and upset entered his mind as his gut filled with dread. "Shiro-chan?"

"My…my last memory was of a meeting with Kuchiki," he said. "Where is she?" It was Momo's turn to frown.

"She went to the living world with Matsumoto-fukutaicho."

"Matsumoto?"

"Yes, she was upset and worried that you were gone so long and was greatly relieved when you returned. She said something about her emotions in turmoil," she gave him a sympathetic smile. "It was something she called retail therapy?"

"Hmmm. Why did Kuchiki go?"

"Because she knows the area," she said as she watched his reaction. "Come on, you must be hungry after everything you've been through. I brought a few of your favorites. Let me go heat up some tea for you."

"Yeah…tea would be great. Thanks." Toshiro watched as she stood up and left the office. He didn't care for the tea; he just wanted a few minutes to be alone. Something wasn't –

A knock interrupted his continuing thoughts.

"Come," he said as he went to his desk and sat down. Renji poked his head in. "Abarai! What are you doing here and what happened to you?" Renji limped in the office and bowed.

"Forgive me, Taicho. I was instructed to assist you while Matsumoto was in the living world. And…" his face turned as red as his hair, "and apparently I had a little too much the other night with Kira and Hisagi. I don't remember what exactly happened..." He cleared his throat.

Toshiro narrowed his eyes as he looked over the tall man. Bruises marred almost everything that was visible. He stood hunched over and his face showed he was still in pain. Toshiro sighed and pointed towards the couch.

"That's her usual spot; you might as well take it."

* * *

><p>Zero silently roamed the empty halls and made her way towards the woman's cell. Areas of the hallway that were damaged were now fixed and in pristine condition. The hallway opened up to the staircase she remembered. The broken pillars were replaced, the debris cleaned up. Everything was as it should be. Like nothing ever happened.<p>

Except…

It did happen. She was here once before in a confused state. She was afraid of her own thoughts; afraid of disappointing Aizen-sama and wanting something…some kind of assurance that it would all be ok. She looked at the stairs, her thoughts interrupted. She heard voices coming in towards her direction. Quickly she ducked behind one of the pillars and kept herself hidden until they had passed. Two more Arrancar she did not recognize. Frowning she emerged from her hiding spot and climbed the stairs.

Expecting to find a row of cells, Zero was surprised to find a large room filled with monitors. Wall to wall, floor to ceiling were lined with various sized monitors. Along the main wall, off to the right was a terminal with a small desk and chair.

Zero looked at a few of the monitors which showed various areas of Los Noches. She saw a big man with spiky hair in one monitor. He was unconscious and submerged in a long vertical tank, similar to the ones she found in Granz's lab. Another monitor was pitch back save for a face. This face Zero was familiar with. This was the man that had killed Granz. He looked to be a cross between perturbed and in pain. She couldn't make out much of anything else. Still another monitor showed a room much like her own.

_Prison._

Two women were in the room sitting on beds opposite from each other. Each of them was chained to the wall and wore a black collar. One looked tall and had short white hair save for a small strand that framed one side of her face. The other had dark hair. Zero recognized her as being with the one who killed Granz. Neither of them were the one she was looking for.

"Ah, Zero-chan, you're awake!" Gin said as his big chair swiveled around to face her. Behind him all of the monitors flickered and went dark. "What are ya doing out of your room? Ya feeling better?" he asked as he looked into her eyes. "Aizen was still pretty mad at ya for what you've done. He wanted ya to suffer for a while longer. But I felt a week was long enough and I sent ya a treatment. Wasn't that nice of me?"

Zero blinked and looked at him. Gin stood and walked towards her. Immediately, Zero got down on her knees and bowed her head. Gin stopped in front of her and placed his hand on her head. "Don't worry. He won't stay mad at ya. Ya did execute your command perfectly. Although if he finds out you've left your room…" As he removed his hand, hers shot out and gripped his arm. Gin opened his eyes in surprise.

"Are they dead? The woman?"

Gin closed his eyes and grinned. "Now Zero-chan, ya know better than to ask questions."

"Ichimaru-sama," she whispered as she bowed her head.

"Humph," he grunted as he removed his arm from her grasp.

"Ulquiorra – "

"What happened to Ulquiorra shouldn't have happened. It was a gross underestimation." Zero looked up at him. "Aizen wanted to see how strong the human had gotten. Of course, he already knew, but had wanted to see it none the less."

"The hollow…" Zero said flatly.

"Yes. Kurosaki Ichigo's powers have grown tremendously in such a short time. I'm afraid Aizen has taken a keen interest in the boy."

"The others?"

"It appears we can remove every last memory from a person yet their essence will remain." He smiled at her. "Ya always were the inquisitive type." It took her a few minutes to comprehend what he said before she frowned.

"Rukia."

"Hmm, yes."

"You knew her."

"I did." Gin cracked open his eyes. "Do ya want to know about her?"

"Rukia is dead."

"Perhaps." Zero regarded him and contemplated his words. She was becoming more confused. Pain shot through her brain and stabbed at her like an ice pick.

"It…does not matter," she managed to get out. The room was spinning.

"No? Well, maybe not. Hitsugaya seems to think otherwise." Zero gasped and placed her hand on her head. Gin placed his hands on her shoulders. "What's wrong, Zero? Zero?" Her head dipped forward and Gin realized he was supporting her. "Ah," he said as he reached into his sleeve. He pulled out a syringe and plunged it into the base of her skull. "I told him leaving ya without a treatment for so long wouldn't be good for ya. It's a matter of time now."

"I am defective," Zero whispered as she opened her eyes.

"What makes ya say that?" Gin asked, slightly shocked. Zero looked away. Ichimaru-sama was with Granz on several occasions so maybe… Maybe he could fix what was so terribly wrong with her. She looked at him. If she admitted her flaws she was sure she would go back to the lab, back to the pain. But what good was she like this?

"I am…not good enough…like Wonderweiss." Zero's eyes widened as Gin burst out laughing. After several minutes he put his hand on her head once more and cupped her face with his other.

"No, you are nothing like that idiot," he said finally. "Everything has a purpose, a reason for being, Zero. We are all pawns in a game that is much bigger than ourselves. Go back to your room and wait for Aizen to summon you." Zero dropped her gaze to the floor and stood. She heard Gin sigh before speaking once more, "She is still alive. Loly and Menoly have been attending to her needs in the cell on the third level. The others are alive as well but I can't guarantee for how long. Aizen is conducting an experiment with a few of them. So who knows." He watched as Zero bowed and left. A genuine smile crossed his lips before he turned back to the monitors.


	20. Chapter 20

**AN: Anyone still out there? Still interested? Time and motivation are hard to come by these days, but anyway…**

* * *

><p>Chapter 20<p>

Zero sat on her bed and closed her eyes. Her jacket was on the floor, lost in the haze of the cool mist that floated right above. It was almost a week since her visit with Ichimaru-sama and Aizen-sama had still not summoned her. She frowned. He was still upset with her. No training, no treatments, no interaction with anyone. This was her punishment; being left to rot.

_At least the others were still alive._

But for how long? Aizen-sama had already admitted that he had no use for the woman. Menoly and Loly were nothing like Ulquiorra. Although they were sweet in front of Aizen-sama, Zero knew they had many faces. Orihime was kind, but there was something about her that was also strong. Surely she could take care of herself?

Her frown deepened.

Once Aizen-sama gained whatever information he wanted from the others, he would have no use for them either. She was very familiar with what happened to those he had no use for. They were sent to the arena or just disappeared. Her nose wrinkled. The humans wouldn't last very long. The Shinigami would have a better chance, but eventually…

_This was wrong._

Zero gasped. Who was she to question what Lord Aizen wanted? Indeed. She was no one. She herself was here only because he had a use for her.

_And what was that exactly?_

She did not know. She was sure it was for something important. The way he would come into the lab and make sure Granz was doing everything a certain way, following his instructions. She shook her head. He all but ignored her since Wonderweiss was created. He even admitted to her that his plans had changed. Maybe now it was a matter of time before he no longer had a use for her. That thought was unsettling. Just as unsettling as a few others she had buried away. One being that Tosen-sama let Wonderweiss attack her on purpose that night. Another was Granz. Ichimaru-sama had once told her that there was little they did not know in Los Noches. Everything everyone did was monitored. So how much did Aizen-sama let Granz get away with when it came to her care?

Her thoughts drifted to the day she woke up in Ulquiorra's room. He must have found her after Granz drugged her. Aizen-sama must have known what Granz was after that night. If that was the case – Her door flew open, interrupting her thoughts. Nnoitora stood in the door way and looked her over.

"Aizen wants to see you," he said. He watched as Zero unfolded her legs and stood. She grabbed her jacket and put it on all under his watchful eye. Ulquiorra did not like this man and in turn, neither did she. He blocked the doorway and sneered at her. "Maybe later I'll come by. You must be lonely with Ulquiorra dead and all." Zero narrowed her eyes.

"Get out of my way," she said slowly and deliberately so her words would be clear.

"Huh," he replied. He stood there defiantly. Zero let her reiatsu flow and balled her hand into a fist. Shards of ice gleamed off of her knuckles as she stared him down. Nnoitora was visibly uncomfortable, but grinned and took a step back. "Feisty women are such a turn on." Zero ignored him and walked past him out into the hallway. "That woman Ulquiorra was so fond of was pretty feisty." Zero froze. As his words sunk in she spun around. Nnoitora was still in her doorway, still grinning. He was baiting her. She cocked her eyebrow and turned back around.

"Aizen-sama is waiting," she said and continued to the throne room. He followed behind her and laughed.

"I could tell you what I've done to her, but I wouldn't want to make you jealous," he continued.

"You speak as if I care," she replied.

"Oh?" he snorted. "I don't believe you." Zero continued on and ignored him. Infuriated this wasn't going as he predicted, Nnoitora grabbed her and pushed her up against the wall and pressed his hard body against hers, pinning her to the wall. "I think you care very much what happens to them. Do you want to know why? You're one of them and that's how it will always be. I don't care what Aizen did to ya, you will never be one of us." Zero narrowed her eyes. "I'm not the only one who thinks this way. The other Espada? We will destroy you." He smiled impossibly wide at her.

"Then you will die," Zero said, facing him. His smile only got wider at the absurdity of her claim.

"Is that a challenge?" he asked, excited.

"Do I have to go over again with you the importance of following orders, Nnoitora?" Aizen said as he emerged from one of the hallways close by. Tosen and Wonderweiss flanked his sides although they were a step behind him. "If you had bothered to follow my instructions that last time, I wouldn't have had to save you from a mere Shinigami." Nnoitora's grin faded as he turned his head. "Don't tell me you are being ungrateful after I have shown you my generosity?"

"N-no. Not at all," he said as he took a few steps back, freeing Zero. She looked at Wonderweiss and Tosen before her eyes settled on Lord Aizen. She fell to her knees and looked at the stone floor. Her heart doubled in speed automatically. "I-I was just bringing her to you like you asked…"

"Leave," Aizen said as he walked towards Zero. Not daring to look up, she heard Nnoitora's footsteps as he scrambled away. "Well now, Zero. It seems we have a bit of a problem now, don't we?" She focused on the floor and said nothing.

* * *

><p>"Kurosaki!" Ishida yelled from his position. He had just taken down another hollow out of countless others and was trying to see how his friend was fairing.<p>

"Ishida!" Ichigo yelled back as yet another hollow dissolved in front of him, clearing the path to his friend. They met and stood together, waiting on the next batch of hollows to arrive. They were in the arena, as they were brought there every morning since their capture. They fought, healed their wounds and fought more until whoever was in charge deemed they could rest; at which point, suppression collars and chains were put on and they were brought back to their cells only to be brought back to the arena to do this again the next day.

Ichigo looked over his shoulder at Ishida's battered and bruised body. "You're not looking so well."

"Speak for yourself. At least my head isn't bleeding all over the place."

"Humph." Ichigo wiped the blood from his eye and looked at the blood that was pouring out of Ishida's hand. He wouldn't be able to shoot for much longer. "Have you thought of a way out of this yet?"

"Finally acknowledging the fact I'm smarter?" he quipped. Ichigo frowned. He hated looking like he was stupid, but it was painfully obvious that after giving it everything he had the first few days of capture, something else was needed. Brute force wasn't going to get them out of this cycle they were in especially since he was now limited. His hand absently touched a small metal device that was implanted under his skin near the base of his skull. He wasn't sure what it was, but it prevented him from releasing his full reiatsu and from going Bankai. The one called Starrk had warned him of trying to remove it. Apparently it was attached to the base of his brain. Remove it and he would turn to ash, like Ulquiorra.

Then there were the others to consider. Starrk had told them that Orihime was kept not in the 5th tower as Aizen had told them. No, that was a complete trap they fell into. She was actually being held elsewhere and was unharmed…for now. Starrk didn't know where Toshiro and Renji were; only that they lost to Zero and Aizen had them in another part of Los Noches.

Zero…

Starrk wouldn't talk about her; her whereabouts, her status, nothing. In fact, no one would. Even Lynette, who would chatter on endlessly about how annoying Orihime was for days on end, would clam up and leave the cells if Zero's name was even mentioned.

"ISHIDA!" Ichigo yelled as he noticed, a bit too late, a hollow come from under a pile of dead bodies. It had claws for hands and immediately gripped Ichida across his midsection. Blood bubbled out of his mouth. His glasses flew to the ground and broke. Ichigo grabbed Zangetsu and slashed the hollow across its face instantly killing it.

As it released Ishida, blood poured out of his gut as he fell to the ground.

"Ishida!" Ichigo said as he ran to his friend.

"End exercise," a voice called out from above. The doors opened and several Arrancar came in. One gently pushed Ichigo aside and started attending to the wound on Ishida. Another attached the suppression collar to Ichigo's neck and took Zangetsu before turning to Ishida. His body was placed on a hovering stretcher and was taken away. Ichigo felt a shove and numbly let himself be led back to the cells. This was the first time in weeks he was heading back there without his friend.

As the door closed behind him, he sat on his cot and put his head in his hands. How were they going to get out of this? Ishida…

"Your friend will be ok," said a voice across the room. Instantly, Ichigo looked up and tried to focus his eyes in the dim light.

"Who…who are you?"

"Hmph," said the tall Espada as he walked the few paces to Ichigo's bed. "I am Zommari Leraux, Kurosaki Ichigo. I am here to take you to Ichimaru-sama."

"How do you know Ishida will be ok?"

"Because Aizen-sama is allowing it."

"Che, that doesn't mean anything."

"Aizen-sama is a great leader! Do you doubt his powers? That's not surprising coming from a lowly human like you."

"And the fact you follow him blindly says a lot about you," Ichigo quipped.

"I do not follow blindly. He has powers of his own and what he can not accomplish, he controls others who can."

"Control? Yeah, I've seen how he controls people," Ichigo said with a note of disgust. "He tears them apart, uses what he can and discards the rest. He is no great leader."

"That is your opinion. Which, I am sorry to say, does not amount to much."

"Where is Ishida?"

"He is two levels above us. The woman who can heal is with him." Ichigo's eyes widened as realization kicked in.

"Inoue!" He jumped and grabbed onto the Espada's collar. "Inoue is with him?"

"Relax!" Zommari said as he shoved Ichigo away who landed on his cot. "She is healing your friend as we speak." Knowing Ishida was safely with Inoue Ichigo felt a little calmer… Ishida would be ok. He let himself breathe.

"What about the rest of my friends?"

"They are in other areas."

"Are they alive?"

"As far as I know."

"What about Zero?" Zommari walked to the cell door.

"It is time to see Ichimaru-sama."

"What about Zero?" he repeated. "How is she?" Zommari said nothing which only infuriated Ichigo. "Why won't you tell me about Zero? Where is she?" Ichigo demanded. The cell door opened.

"Aaah, Kurosaki-kun," Ichimaru said as he walked into the cell. Zommari stammered and sputtered an apology for his lateness only for Gin to wave him off. "Go back to your room. I am sure Aizen will be calling for a meeting soon." Zommari bowed deeply before leaving. Gin turned to Ichigo and smiled.

"Where is Zero?" Ichigo asked. "Is she ok? What have you done to her?" Gin looked at him and smiled.

"You are somethin' else, Kurosaki-kun. It isn't a wonder why Aizen is so interested in ya."

"Why won't anyone tell me about her?"

"Because they don't know."

"What?"

"What Aizen does with his experiments are on a need to know basis. Ya don't need to know."

"Like hell I don't!" Ichigo curled his fingers into fists. "You're the one who took Rukia in the first place. You're the one who did all this to her!"

"Oh, now…Don't ya like what we've done with her? She's oh so much more powerful this way. She was able to keep up with yer hollow without too much damage. She's quite impressive."

"Where is she?"

"I'm shocked that ya keep asking about the only one who ya can't save and not about the others who ya can." He walked over to the bed and grabbed Ichigo's wrist and quickly twisted it behind his back, forcing him to his knees. He let out a grunt as he fell. Gin produced a syringe and injected its contents to the side of Ichigo's neck. "No more questions. It's time we had ya healed. After all, you're part of Aizen's plan."

Ichigo started to protest but found everything in his world went dark.

* * *

><p>Toshiro opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. He had looked at it so many times over the years since he became a captain. He would stare for hours waiting for the solution to his latest problem to appear there somehow. Although it never did, he stared none the less. Today was no exception. Momo had checked in on him for what seemed like the hundredth time that morning and left to tend to her own duties. Abarai had not shown up for work yet. That in itself wasn't entirely unusual. He had heard from Kuchiki before that he was known to be late on occasions. Kuchiki… He blinked. Although that is what he always called her, today it seemed…wrong.<p>

Kuchiki Rukia.

His dreams as of late were about the little raven haired woman. He sighed as his mind returned to the latest installment...

"_Hitsugaya Taicho!" Rukia said as she stood at attention. She had been training and had missed when Toshiro walked over._

"_At ease, Kuchiki," he replied as he walked past her and sat down beneath a tree at the edge of the training ground. He looked at the sky and sighed. Puzzled, Rukia walked over._

"_Are…are we going to train or would you like me to continue what I've been doing?" She asked. Several minutes went by and she was about to repeat herself when his gaze shifted and his eyes met hers. They looked troubled, conflicted. Curious, Rukia took a step closer and sat across from him. "Are you ok, Taicho?"_

"_I'm not sure," he replied. _

"_Is there anything I can do?" she asked noticing his eyes never left hers. She felt warm under his gaze, but not uncomfortable. On impulse, she reached out and touched his hand. A bolt of electricity shot through her as his eyes widened. She blushed and retracted her hand. "I..I'm sorry," she mumbled. He reached out to her and put her hand in his._

"_Don't be," he said as he looked at her hand. It was small, delicate and fit nicely in his; which only fueled his confusion even more. He closed his eyes and felt how his body seemed to respond so easily to hers. A simple hand holding and he was on fire. "Rukia…"_

Then there was the other dream. Violet eyes stared coldly at him; pale skin with traces of hollow bone; a hole where her heart should be… Toshiro shook his head. He sat up and frowned as he thought back to his last real memory. It was shortly after the human invaded Soul Society. Kurosaki Ichigo, the one who saved Rukia from execution and then again from Aizen, was talking to Ukitake about becoming a Substitute? Hinamori was at the 4th after her own ordeal with Aizen.

Aizen.

What happened after he left? He couldn't remember. What happened to Kurosaki? He couldn't remember. What happened to Kuchiki?

_Be happy, Toshiro…_

He couldn't remember. He supposedly went on several missions since that time but he couldn't remember any of them. As Hinamori filled in his history he found himself listening to the words, but they didn't feel right. They felt rehearsed.

"Shiro-chan!" Momo said as she entered his office without knocking. Toshiro frowned. It had been a week since Matsumoto and Kuchiki…Rukia went to the living world for "retail therapy" but there had been no contact. Oddly, every time he mentions them to Hinamori, the subject quickly gets changed or she brushes the matter off as being something minor.

She was acting strange as well. When they were alone, he felt uncomfortable. A feeling he tried to blame on his amnesia, but even that felt like a lie. The other evening she brought dinner to his office after Abarai had left. She started talking about their time together when they were young. He remembered those feelings he used to have for her but there was something else. Something…off. Again, he tried to ignore it, but when she moved to hold him, it didn't feel right.

"Are you ok? You know, you should be relaxing in your room. You would be so much more comfortable there."

"I'll relax where ever I want."

"Are you feeling better?"

"You mean since ten minutes ago when you asked me last?"

"Okay, okay," Momo said as she laughed lightly and sat on the opposite end of the couch. "You're a grump. How about we go for a walk?"

"I have things to do. Abarai hasn't come in yet."

"Oh, yeah…I forgot to tell you this morning. Abarai-kun had a bit too much to drink last night and is in the 4th."

"Great," Toshiro said as he rubbed his eyes. He could feel his pulse throb as the tension headache started to increase pressure. Abarai wasn't known to be an avid drinker. Even Matsumoto would complain how he would shirk going out with her in order to train.

"Are you ok?" she asked as she stood behind the couch. She placed her hands on his shoulders and started a massage.

"I'm fine," he said as he shrugged her hands off.

"Can I get you anything?"

"Matsumoto."

"Huh?"

"Matsumoto. Why is she still not here? Why have I not been able to reach her? Why has she not checked in?" He looked at Momo who smiled at him.

"I'm sure she just got caught up in the fun of the living world. That's what happened to Kuchiki-san when she first went there. Remember? She was several weeks late coming back."

"That's not acceptable. They both should be here where they belong," he said as he stood up.

"Where are you going?"

"To see the old man," he replied as he reached the door.

"For what?"

"For permission to retrieve my Fukutaicho!" _and Kuchiki. _His mind added. Confused he looked at Hinamori. Something in his mind clicked. "You know something, don't you? That's why you're always here, looking in on me. It's not just because of what happened on the last mission, is it?"

"Shiro-chan…."

"There's more going on. Tell me!"

"Yes," she replied softly. "There's a lot more, but – "

"What is it?" he asked as he crossed the room and put his hands on her shoulders. "Where are they?"

"Shiro-chan…" Momo said.

"Where?" he demanded and slightly shook her. Tears started to form in the corners of her eyes as she looked at him. She threw herself at him and draped her arms over his shoulders. She buried her face in his haori and let her tears go. "Hina…mori?"

"I'm sorry…." She sobbed.

"For what?" He asked as he held her. "What have you done?" He didn't have a chance to say anything else as he felt a prick stab him in the shoulder. Soon, everything went black.


End file.
